With wax melted, I'd meet the sea

c. × 25 × she/they

[camtot]

🍊🍊

[fayriequeene]

[desire-mona]

watching mushroom and mold growth time lapse videos like theyre horror compilations

[herowyn]

5 0    Y E A R S    A G O

[closetocanada]

Happy Moon Landing Day! ❤️👩‍🚀🌛

[twoweeks]

celineyrs

[alexisneverokay]

i hope one day we get to see the real robby. i hope we're able to see him find a way to drag himself out of these lowest of lows, and ask for help, and make steps forward in recovery and figuring out who he is outside of his actions within the hospital. i hope we get to see him learn, and understand, and then internalise the fact that he's worth more to the world than what he does in the ER department. i hope one day the show will start and it *won't* be one of the worst days of robby's life, because he's gone through hell and now he's come out of the other side.

more than anything i want him to get to the positive stage where the viewers can be directly shown the man who earnt the trust of trinity despite her traumatising past, and the man who has such a good rapport with the nurses that they automatically assume he's asking about them on a personal level when he talks to them since that's just who he is, and the man who gives javadi the space and encouragement to grow into who she wants to be, giving her the courage to understand that she's more than her parents wishes for her.

we know he's there somewhere, every interaction with the other staff show us that that's who he is inside, someone deeply caring and loving and driven, above all else, by an all-consuming empathy that is now eating him alive. i wish so badly that we'll get to see him happy and healthier and with the capacity to take care of not only others, but himself as well. he deserves that recovery and he deserves that peace and the medical community who have so deeply connected with this character deserve a story that is, at it's core, still driven by hope for a better future.

who knows if it will be one, or two, or four seasons down the line that we might get to this point. recovery is never linear and when faced with a broken system, the setbacks will be hard and the lows frequently catastrophic. but nonetheless, robby deserves a happy ending and deserves to find a way to get back the parts of him that burnout and depression have stolen from him. my biggest wish with this show will be to see the day robby has found some peace and respite, and is able to give once more the empathy that his relationships with others are all founded by. that maybe this might be a sign to people that hope isn't lost, and we can work for and achieve a better and kinder future within the medical field and beyond.

[puppiegracie]

yeah at the core of it, on a very personal level, michael robinavitch means so so much to me as a character. I'm not a 50ish year old jewish man. I'm not a doctor. I didn't workhorse myself through covid, my mother didn't abandon me, I didn't watch my mentor and father figure die.

but I know exactly how it fucking feels to be tired, exhausted in every part of you. how it feels to lash out, hurt people you care about, start to fail at the one thing you've put all your worth into. you are the villain and the victim and the spectator all at once, and beyond that, or maybe in the center of it, you're a crying, hurting child. and you just can't take anymore.

he doesn't wanna die— he keeps grasping at reasons to stay, excuse after excuse. if baran is unfit to run the ED then maybe he has to stay. if dennis can't look after his house maybe he's gotta stay. if duke is dying, well, shouldn't he stay? what if langdon relapses, shouldn't he stay, keep an eye on it? he's clawing at life, clawing at purpose, clawing at the one thing that gave his existence meaning. nothing will ever matter more than what I've done in this hospital. trying to prove to himself he's still needed and coming up empty.

so no, he doesn't wanna die. he just doesn't wanna be here anymore. he doesn't wanna be anywhere, anymore. you don't wanna die, it's never about that. you just don't want to exist. you want it all to stop, and oh, it never, ever does. I'm tired of feeling like you can't get ahead, I'm tired of feeling like I'm drowning every day, I'm tired of all of it.

so, so, so, so tired. anger, grief, stress, anxiety. at the root of all of those, at the root of even the most explosive emotions, especially the most explosive emotions, is fatigue. fatigue that inhibits everything else, every ability to function, leaving you running on fumes. emotions dysregulated, self-control spiraling, self-worth in the trash. (have you ever thought about hurting yourself?) that haunted look in his eyes that answers yes, all the time.

so no, I'm not a doctor, I'm not a 50ish year old jewish man. I don't have the same life experiences, the same traumas. but I know depression very well, and I know exactly how it feels to want to die. and no portrayal of it has hit me in the gut quite like this one does. and it is so fucking important to me.

[heyfruitcake]

Now that everyone is discussing Nolan's Odyssey movie, I feel like it's a good time to let non-Italians know that the production dumped plastic props into the Italian sea. Weirdly enough I could not find any article in English about it but it's a fucking problem nonetheless.

I might translate this article later today. This one was the most complete one, even in Italian news it's not talked about that much.

L'Odissea di Nolan tra "scheletri spazzatura" e relitti: Arpa al lavoro in Sicilia, che succede

Non è la prima volta che la produzione solleva un vespaio in Sicilia. A Lipari una squadra di sub sarebbe però già impegnata a bonificare i

[ignitelimelight]

They dumped plastic skeletons in environmentally protected areas, against the literal contracts they had to sign to get the permits to film in environmentally protected areas. Like they not only did a bad ecological thing that freaked out some divers, they literally broke environmental protection laws and their contract with the Italian government

[cuppydogshane]

all the rights that come with marriage you should be able to have without marriage btw. you should be able to designate a person who can visit you in the hospital regardless of your relationship to that person.

[beardedmrbean]

[pommegf]

the approach to bosigran castle, southwest coastal path, Cornwall.

[sobcat]

wild horses living on the cliffs of the welsh gower

[canichangemyblogname]

This June, I need Gen Z queers to understand that some people are closeted.

[canichangemyblogname]

I am saying this as a Gen Z queer, before y’all get your guns out to fucking shoot me.

But I need y’all to understand that if someone doesn’t give you their government name in a queer space, it’s not because they’re “mysterious,” and you do not have permission to take it upon yourself to figure out their “real identity” and go digging for them online like a private investigator. First, that’s creepy and a violation of privacy and reasonable boundaries. Second, some of us keep our private and professional lives very separate because we need to keep food on the fucking table and a roof over our heads, and our private life could jeopardize that.

[canichangemyblogname]

“Why won’t you tell me about your parents?” “Why can’t I know your real name?” “Where do you work?”

1.) Not all our parents would bake us a fucking cake when we come out. Some of us are closeted. Surely you understand this? You also do not need to know my parent’s names or occupations; we are both adults. I do not need nor want to mix you and my private life with my parents and my public life.

2.) Trans people do not owe you their dead name or government name

3.) I’m not telling you for the sake of job security. I am a government fucking caseworker working amidst a fucking lavender panic!

“There’s no way you’re a different person outside this; you’re still you at your core. What harm is there—”

No, I am a completely different person. A different person with a different personality and different interests and a different name and presentation. I am a completely different person because I keep this life and my public life private to avoid fracturing 90% of my interpersonal relationships and 100% of my professional ones.

“You’re not out? But you’re so confident.”

See— that’s part of the issue. Y’all assume someone is in the closet because they hate themselves or lack self-identity. Some of us know exactly who we are, but need to prioritize financial stability or else our entire life gets exponentially harder immediately.

[canichangemyblogname]

You meet queer people over the age of 40 and one of the first/earliest questions is “who knows?”

I need y’all to start bringing that energy. Because it’s not always safe for someone to be out and not everyone is safe to be out around.

There is a misnomer that “the closet” inherently means “doesn’t know they’re queer” and not “isn’t out widely and publicly.” “Outness” is often a patchwork.

[annafridacharlotte]

[microcheap]

somebody fucking sedate me

[microcheap]

this is distressing

[microcheap]

somebody fucking sedate me

[pietroleopoldo]

So true Italo