Misc.

Misc. Strange, alien, unlovable thing. Occassional writer/artist. Living in the walls of an old house.

[evilwizard]

just a heads up. im gonna do a big curse soon

[evilwizard]

okay so honestly i wasn’t expecting they’d be able to hide the body for this long

[evilwizard]

LINDSEY GRAHAM ?

[breya-etherium-shaper]

*multiplies you by 1*

Ach im the exact same but a process has occurred

[worldheritagepostorganization]

World Heritage Post

[breya-etherium-shaper]

*multiplies you by 1*

Ach im the exact same but a process has occurred

[worldheritagepostorganization]

World Heritage Post

[magneatio]

[magneatio]

[galactic-mayhem]

saw this on pinterest but i think it belongs here too

[ram-me-ramiel]

*thap thaps you*

[moffpup]

[lonelyphantom]

i will never risk saying this in an actual gaming server but I don't think constantly screaming out of anger when you're playing is good

[lonelyphantom]

if a game is making you so angry that you have to scream, dusturbing the whole house and distressing your teammates maybe close the game and go cool your head and i mean this in the nicest most literal way possible

[tastylemonbread]

friend who went to bed is a type of dead wife

[didderd-reblogs]

[so-much-for-subtlety]

in 2015 we didn’t have AI psychosis so people had to make do by believing a dress was white and gold

[thickness-protection-program]

Because it was

[queer-as-city-folk]

Is the gold in the room with us right now?

[thatoneliquidbicricket]

yes. the dress is gold.

...

the dress has always been gold

r u saying this doesn't look white and gold to u???

...

[queer-as-city-folk]

what.

[estrogenesis-eeveeangelion]

it's a white and gold dress in cool blue dim lighting w/ bright warm light behind it, making an optical illusion. we're not fucking doing this again

[im-mender]

[estrogenesis-eeveeangelion]

oh god fucking damn it

[kaban-bang]

I know tumblr likes to exclusively make it about bloody hospitals but this is what Color Theory is about

[theflowergrrl]

HOW DID THIS DISCOURSE COME BACK IN THE YEAR OF OUR LORD 2026!???

[marzipanandminutiae]

when I tell you people were shouting up and down my dorm's hallways about this when it first happened

(the dress was by Roman Originals and it was in fact blue and black. but they made a one-off white and gold one for charity later)

[circusheart]

If I keep practicing I might even be a person soon

[pennythemechpilot]

@demilypyro

[whosname]

[id. A twitter post by @/Bennieeexyz Jury duty letter came addressed to my cat. Not a mistake. "Felix Martinez" - that's his full name according to his vet records. My last name. His first name. Somehow he's a registered voter now. Called the county clerk. Me: My cat got summoned for jury duty. Clerk: Is the name correct on the summons? Me: Yes, but he's a cat. Clerk: Is Felix Martinez a legal resident of this county? Me: He's a legal cat. Clerk: Sir, if the name matches our records, he needs to appear or file an exemption. Me: He can't file anything. He has paws. Clerk: You can file on his behalf. Me: Under what exemption? There's no box for "is a cat." Clerk: (pause) Check "unable to serve due to medical reasons." Me: What's the medical reason? Clerk: He's a cat. Me: That's not a medical condition. Clerk: It is if it prevents him from serving. Sent in the form. Got rejected two weeks later. "Insufficient documentation. Please provide medical professional's statement." Took the letter to my vet. Me: I need you to write that my cat can't do jury duty. Vet: Why is your cat summoned for jury duty? Me: Excellent question. No good answer. Vet: This is the weirdest request I've gotten. Me: Can you just write that he's medically unfit to serve? Vet: On what grounds? Me: He's a cat. Vet: (started typing) "Patient is unable to serve due to species-related limitations including inability to speak, read, or comprehend legal proceedings." Me: Perfect. Sent it in. Got another rejection. "Summons is mandatory. Failure to appear will result in contempt of court." My roommate thought this was hilarious. Roommate: Felix is going to jail. Me: This is serious. Roommate: Bring him to court. See what happens. Decided that was actually the only option left. Day of jury duty, put Felix in his carrier. Brought the entire paper trail of rejection letters. Checked in at the courthouse. Clerk: Name? Me: Felix Martinez. Clerk: (looked at the cat carrier) Is that Felix? Me: Yes. Clerk: (long stare) He's a cat. Me: I've been saying that for six weeks. Clerk: Why didn't you file an exemption? Me: I filed three. All rejected. Showed her the letters. She read through them, expression shifting from confusion to disbelief. Clerk: Someone rejected the veterinary documentation? Me: Twice. Clerk: (called her supervisor over) You need to see this. Supervisor read everything. Looked at Felix. Looked at me. Supervisor: How did a cat get registered to vote? Me: You tell me. Supervisor: This is a data error. Me: Took you six weeks to figure that out. They dismissed Felix immediately. Apologized for the inconvenience. Supervisor: We'll remove him from the voter registry. Me: Appreciate it. Supervisor: (pause) Out of curiosity, how would he have voted? Me: Probably whatever party supports universal treats. Got a formal apology letter a week later and a voter registration card. For me this time. Apparently I wasn't registered, but my cat was. Roommate: Felix committed voter fraud. Me: Felix committed nothing. He's innocent. Roommate: That's what they all say. Felix is sleeping on the jury summons now. Fitting end to his legal career. end id]

[kdinjenzen]

A Proper Fairy Environment Simulation Device~

Comic by @girl-poss Original text post by @amnesiaguy All voices by Kdin Jenzen/Me~

[girl-poss]

aaaaaaaa!! this is the best thing i could have imagined waking up to from a nice nap!!! this is excellent <3

[ihatepissvortex]

[kropotkindersurprise]

September 22 2020 - A Hillsboro man convicted to 6 months for drug possession managed to make his escape from the courthouse. A cop trying to stop him gave himself broken ribs and a concussion and had to be taken to hospital, while the hero of our story managed a clean getaway and is still on the loose. [video]

[canadian-marxist]

I’ve watched this over and over again and I laugh every time

[emiliusthegreat]

I’m still trying to figure out what he was hoping to achieve by diving headfirst over the banister like that.

[strawberry-crocodile]

Bold of you to assume cops have any thought process other than “im a cool action hero”

[pileofknives]

Rolling down the stairs like a fucking slab of ham lmao

[chillgamesh-the-swing]

[unashamedly-enthusiastic]

Every single time I see this I’m reminded of that husky that had never seen stairs before

[ovenroastedtwerkey]

[stormesandshowers]

Whenever I see that gif my head just plays Nicki Minaj’s “Nuh, nuh, nuh, na-nuh-na-nuh-nuh Ah-huh di-duh, a-nuh-di-da-duh”

[mxtomituck]

Pigs still cannot fly confirmed

[runcibility]

ellingson.tv on instagram

[sometiktoksarevalid]

[mousidy]

jax died before she could come out, and she died before she could become a better person and make any kind of amends with the people she hurt. I don't think the story was written that way by accident

[mousidy]

she's horribly repressed and comes from horrible circumstances including homelessness. she also pushed away every hand extended to her and every chance she could have taken to get better. there were a million better decisions she could have made and she did not make them, and she caused an incredible amount of harm along the way. and still the story wants us to believe her worthy of being understood and loved

[mousidy]

to come out would be to embody herself, to view herself as a real person, to start to leave the haze of dissociation that allows her to think of herself and everyone else as cartoon archetypes in a false world where nothing matters

she's desperate to stay in this world that she sees as false, where she's a funny cartoon character and she can still brush off the pain she causes as silly cartoon antics

it's exactly this dissociation that allows her not to take her own pain or the pain of others seriously. it was what ultimately led to her death. a jax that cannot come out is also a jax that cannot make amends

[mousidy]

something I love about a tragic story, where a character fails to complete the arc that might have satisfied us as the audience, is that it asks us what led to the tragedy

the despair it leaves us with, the satisfaction it denies us, leaves us to yearn for things to have turned out differently. it leaves us thinking about what could have been done, what decisions could have been made, what different circumstances could have prevented the tragedy? dissatisfaction drives us to act

you're not supposed to be satisfied when she dies

[mousidy]

I love, by the way, the matter-of-fact cut from her walking away to her already being gone. like many tragedies we experience in our lives, the news comes to us unceremoniously, undramatically, flatly. it arrives well after the moment where we could have been there. in one quiet moment the world shifts underneath our feet. at first it feels like nothing at all until the information percolates through us, manifesting first as a dull ache that feels inadequately small and insignificant

we don't get to ask "what could I have done if I were there," we can only ask "what could I have done before it got this bad?"