Raze This Barn

Claudia, 24, UK I like lots of shit

[toastbutteregg]

[auckie]

When I was little I wanted to be Italian REALLT badly bc I loved the movie cars and specifically had a crush on this fucking THING

Which doesn’t speak English at all, all it’s line are in Italian and it’s name is GUIDO. And everyone knew I was obsessed with Italy in elementary school but they didn’t know why bc I, even as a young autistic child, had the sense to know this was a rightfully so, highly mockable thing. So I would read about cars on IMDB and then one day someone posted a crackfic on the message boards there and it was about this guy getting drunk and beating his wife, and it snapped me out of my fugue long enough to realize how absurd wanting to be Italian was, but then it made me cry really hard and my parents were like ‘hey what the fuck’ and I didn’t have the chutzpah to admit anything so I told them I saw a naked lady online and then they went into the computer and found all the weird south park midi songs I downloaded on lime wire and I thought they were literally going to kill me for about two weeks.

[auckie]

The reason I was downloading South Park episodes and songs on limewire and frostwire was because I was also obsessed with Kenny McCormick and for school we had to make a shitty little website about a world issue, so I found this free platform that doesn’t exist anymore but it was like a horrible little wix site from the mid aughts, and we based my groups theme on global warming. But when we were done with it I repurposed it as a perosnal site and lied about being a voluptuous blonde 19 year old woman who worked at a fictitious restaurant called the lunchbox, and I just wrote about how obsessed I was with Kenny McCormick and my sister found it and was like what the fuck is wrong with you. But she never told my parents. She also found this 80 page story I was writing about buddy the elf and all my weird skater ocs breaking into the moulin rouge, and at one point I was sick of buddy so I had a herd of buffalo trample him in the middle of a city and it was very tragic but jarring and unexpected. And she referenced a part of the story to me and it made me SO fucking paranoid that I wiped our entire, family shared packard bell computer and got in huge fucking trouble for it.

[kalichnikov]

[deejay]

What’s the mood today?

[chicks1023]

[chicks1023]

[killerkitty707]

“Yoink” is the opposite of “Yeet”

[wierdrocks]

But it’s just as fast

[viewtiful-kim-deactivated202105]

The Lord yeeteth and the Lord yoinketh away

[missauditore]

I could die, my brother just ran up to my house while I was taking out the rubbish, recited what the courier always says in Skyrim, handed me a wax sealed letter and ran away like a full on NPC. Skyrim themed dinner party night here I come!!

[missauditore]

The Skyrim dinner party happened!! The food was authentic, we played Skyrim bingo, did quizzes and ended the night with Skyrim mafia!! (The card game) it was incredible! Thought it would be rude not to follow up this invitation without posting the results!

[shittymoviedetails]

In Up (2009), Violet Parr, from The Incredibles (2004), makes a cameo appearance.

[mikachu1122]

[whitepeopletwitter]

[whitepeopletwitter]

[chylerleighs]

[whitepeopletwitter]

[missauditore]

Totally the same for queues for rides at theme parks

[koobaxion-deactivated20220403]

here’s a hot take: giftwrap is dumb, 95% of the time you can just hand someone the thing and accomplish the same task. Society has conditioned us to love wrapping shit up for no reason, probably by gift wrap industry people.

[dunkstein]

Counterpoint: monkey instinct says uncovering secret bounty from colorful shell good as fuck

[bitchycode]

[ratgrrrlz]

[lifeofcynch]

[xx-sikki-nixx-xx-deactivated202]

this just triggered a memory I didn’t know I had

[moved-to-averinthine-deactivate]

ROMAN SOLDIER: halt, strange person! where are you from?

TIME TRAVELER: i come from the future. what are your names?

ROMAN SOLDIER: my name is QUINTUS, as i am the fifth child in my family. my comrade is SEXTUS, for he was the sixth child in his family. what is your name?

TIME TRAVELER: my name’s LIV

ROMAN SOLDIER: [starts counting on his fingers as his eyes open in fear]

[memewhore]

[thefuzzydave]

I have no idea what to do with this information

[pics-that-make-you-go-hmm]

[patchwork-fox]

wen u have a $100 gift card 2 da ethiopian supermarket

[iwannapushyourdaisies]