global slutmuffin

trash on every level  - the loud polyglot in your group of friends

[marisatomay]

babygirl you would not believe the superiority complex me and the other never left tumblr homies have right now

[rattle-my-stars]

[flowercrownimpala]

i wonder if actors ever get their scripts and are like

well this is fucking stupid

[daenerys-targaryen-moved]

[plavoptice]

[image description: photos of the cast of Game of Thrones at the season 8 table read, in various stages of grief]

[woomylord-deactivated20240930]

posts that are made funnier by the image description

[princesofphithia]

jo march in little women (2019) was like [you’ll be bored of him in two years and we’ll be interesting forever] [i love my liberty too well to give it up anytime soon] [can i call you teddy] [but i’m so lonely] [i want to be loved] [i can’t believe childhood is over]

[vampmilf]

Germany has states????

hey before i answer this can you let me know if youre american real quick

[vampmilf]

yeah that checks out

[beardedmrbean]

[rockshitty]

Gandalf throwing his staff at gollum is what really makes this

[captain-snark]

Thank you for commenting because I was going to scroll past this. 

[boypart-blog]

WHAT!!!!

[transhumanisticpanspermia]

No

They can leap 36 feet

As in leap forward 36 feet

They don’t jump 36 feet into the fucking sky do you know how terrifying that would be the human race wouldn’t have survived because we’d have all had heart attacks while still in Africa

[handsomeamoeba]

[endquestionmark]

#death from above

[uhouse]

this post makes me cry every single damn time

[gabbigabriella]

This is one of those legendary posts that’s been around since I first made a Tumblr. When I didn’t have access to my Tumblr for a few years I would sometimes reference this post. Iconic lol

[vaspider]

My spouses and I talk about this post at least once a week, often because I think about it and start laughing helplessly without explanation and can only squeak out “lion… in the sky… ” when they ask me what the fuck I’m on about

[bigbosscangotohell]

years ago i watched this p/orn and the girl was screaming ‘oh god!! oh god!!!’ and the dude was like ‘there are no gods here’ and to this day it haunts me wtf was he talking about

[hiamigoman]

[icarus-suraki]

Happy Easter.

[unclefather]

*touches the dirt* something happened here

[dingdongyouarewrong]

i love that rebecca bunch is listed as bisexual on the crazy ex-girlfriend wiki page. there’s nothing that states she’s bi on the show someone just put that on there. and honestly they are right. good for them

[phantomrose96]

“Be sure to shake it!” the bubble tea barista tells me but I don’t. I won’t. Why would I? “It mixes the sugar” maybe you want that. Maybe YOU do. To be drinking some homogenous concoction. Uniformly distributed. Each sip the same as the last. Just as sweet. Just as sweet. Just as sweet. All pointless flat indulgence. No personality. No humanity. A time-loop of your own devising, bereft of experience, sanitized of risk.

I want my first sip to be teeth-curdlingly sweet. I want the next to be horribly disappointing. I want to hunt. I want to jab my straw into pockets of substance like my ancestors stirring twigs into a bug colony. I want to raise the straw to different depths and feel something. The ocean is so far but I know what it means to rise from its syrupy dark depths into the still waters above.

I want all boba. I want no boba. I want to scoop the bubbles with my straw when the ice-rocks have been washed dry by the tide. “Be sure to shake it.” Never. I want to experience every human emotion in this cup of tea. I am not a coward. I am not a sheep. My tea is still enough for pond-skaters to glide. It will not shake. Live your repetitive nothing. Live in fear of the unknown. Live your fear of change. I am choking on a boba.

[gen-is-gone]

[phantomrose96]

You. You understand this post.

[itsmidknight]

This whole thing with Whatsapp, Instagram and Facebook being down and Tumblr still going strong is like that point in a sports movie where the team of serious, hard-trained professional athletes suddenly can't play the match because of food poisoning of whatever so their only hope left is a group of absolutely unhinged lunatics

[nb-nightwing-deactivated2022111]

Once again Tumblr wins by not even having enough code to break

[guooey]

Stop looking at Instagram for an impossible to get figure and form and start looking at some ancient pottery figurines

[guooey]

ok this one from the tang dynasty is going to make me cry so hard

[unashamedly-enthusiastic]

She’s over 1000 years old and I love her

[headspace-hotel]

Round…

[ampervadasz]

Unmute !

[theriu]

IT IS VITALLY IMPORTANT THAT YOU UNMUTE!!!!

[the-real-fucking-daddy]

um num num num. aaam! num num num

[uvindi]

the above^ transcription is both correct and not doing justice to the video at the same time

[shadow-wizard-moneygang]

[reblogsnotlikes]

What the fuck is that

[transfemininomenon]

[cabybapa]

going bonkers at this