Yoinks

26, queer, tired Know what I like? Tiny versions of things

[queerculus]

shoveling handfuls of baby carrots into my mouth after jerking off to create a pavlovian response that allows me to see fine details at 2 miles whenever I get an erection

[ooccoo]

[fearthefuzzybear]

oh uh. scuse me. just a lil snail crossing your dash

[alex51324]

I love how certain I am that I’m not the only person who stopped scrolling to let the snail finish crossing the dash.  

In fact, I would bet small sums of money that the majority of Tumblr folk do.    

[teatops]

Rb for the lil hops it does at the end before it finishes crossing 🥺💓

[support]

One legitimately weird thing about Tumblr is that we literally can’t code for shit, many people quit working at Tumblr due to a hostile work environment, and we can’t seem to program a simple blogging website to not flood your RAM.

[monopoison3r]

nearing the 10 year anniversary of banishing editable reblogs

[rabbitrah]

Me thinking why a whale (big) would eat krill (small) and then I remembered rice (yum)

[rabbitrah]

so few people appreciate the wisdom I have to offer.........

[amygdalae]

kind of hate my stupid caustic pussy for dissolving my underwear over time but it's kind of cool, like, scientifically

[destinationtoast]

dying at this sequence from @pinkydragon01 :

[halfbloodfanboy]

[cultstatus]

you can search anything on here and get completely unrelated x reader fanfics. you could search up rainbow trout and it would only take a few scrolls before you hit the Jung Kook BTS x f!reader exhibitionist kink fic

[boringkate]

You listen to music regularly? Why? Have you even tried quitting? Could you quit? You get music stuck in your head? Wow. You're so ruined and music brained. I bet you make your partners listen to music with you when you have sex. Music addiction has really ruined a whole generation. You know it's not realistic to expect reverb in real life, right? You're probably so desensitized that you don't even feel anything anymore when you hear a bird singing that it wants some fuck.

[paradigm-adrift]

I don't have a problem with people listening to music per se, but I do have a problem with the music industry exploiting & mistreating artists.

Personally, I abstain from all music in order to keep my hands clean but really music should just be illegal outright to protect musicians from abuse.

[terramythos]

holy shit this person in the notes

[discodyke-dogthing]

[chaoticgouda]

[leafstem]

*while sewing*: you are a fabric. you can stay a fabric. you do not yearn to return to being string.

[butchtoks]

[baejax-the-great]

Somewhere out there on a planet very far away is a civilization that has included our sun in a beloved constellation of some animal we couldn't dream up if we tried

[kihart]

for dan, phil and all peeps that get it

[iamthemaestro]

found this at an antique shop the other day and was immediately like oh this belongs on tumblr. sniles sneetly. fwowns fwangry.

[dduane]

Meanwhile, via Bluesky...

(See also the video here from ITN.)

[cafffine]

woke up this morning, rolled over, and very confidently tried to blow out my alarm clock like a candle. absolutely no precedent for that.

[wizardshark]

In the year 1450 a priest rolls over and slams his hand into his candle, burning him and sending wax flying all over the place

[moon111111]

[neonfretra]

do you want to play dead bodies with me

[neonfretra]

floats along your dash face down and quiet and cold