[nineinchmales]

Did you know that um…. (remembers that words are very unnecessary, they can only do harm) …………

[girlbloke]

I could really do with a reward or incentive

[m-has-a-blog]

Lovely sentiment but the way it’s worded sounds like this dude got fucking killed during a little league game

[kaisertheadvisor]

You know what day it is today.

[charl0ttan]

[one-time-i-dreamt]

Creepypasta characters were real, but nobody was afraid of them or treated them seriously anymore because they were all washed up and past their prime. Slenderman wore a wig and apparently got addicted to cocaine.

[xaveria]

noticed my coworker was on tumblr so i told them “i like your shoelaces” and they said “never say that out loud to me”

[xaveria]

this is the correct response btw

[dogpuppy]

[xargon]

me: yeah so a few years ago someone invented infinite scrolling and really it was a terrible idea

the elf I just hooked up with, taking the lavender and honeysuckle lollipop from their mouth: An infinite scroll... most elfmaidens learn to enchant a scroll to never end before they're a mere 300 years old. It saves on paper.

me: oh see that's just writing, with social media it's really bad, it just leads to people doomscrolling all day

the elf I just hooked up with, spluttering and panicked: The Doomscroll! Be silent human, thou shoulds't not speak the name of that fell parchment

me: oh so you get it

[parkchanwoohoo]

[freakoutgirl]

the internet seems like a distant dream

[freakoutgirl]

whatever we are on rn is not the internet. It's ads

[lemonsweet]

Smiley face french fry from memory

[lemonsweet]

I don't know why you guys are so afraid it's just a memory

[baeddel]

[themysteriousmurasamecastle]

its fucking snowing outside i've never seen snow in my life what is this shit

[grulu]

[themysteriousmurasamecastle]

can you get out of here

[charl0ttan]

does anyone have the foggiest

[amygdalae]

haven't. fresh out of the faintest as well

[lowpolyanimals]

Pig from Black and White

[persianmom-deactivated20251026]

what will it be, boss? the comfort of misery or the pain of change?

[wizard-of-interesting-failure]

[redarmyscreaming]