You Betcha~

Mollie, 31 ❤️🏳️‍🌈✌️

[flutterbvnny]

daddy has regretfully informed kitten that we need a dual income household to survive

[armandology]

fuuuuck i just realized that the future idealized version of myself cant exist without current me being the catalyst for change and doing hard things. has anybody heard about this

[heymacy]

HEATED RIVALRY SEASON ONE + hall of fame text posts

[sheisraging]

yes good.

[mutationgirl]

im calling for an immediate moratorium on men until we can figure out what’s going on.

[deceasedcardinal]

[calcazars]

let it be known that i touch grass frequently and I’m still like this.

[lakemojave]

"Please don't hit on anyone when we go out later you keep swearing chivalric oaths of fealty"

Me after one beer talking to a woman two inches taller than me: I could be yuor sword

[dailyflicks]

COMMUNITY 1.12: Comparative Religion

[livesuffer]

sorry about all the mean things i said when i was right

[rounni]

[spidersinmysoup]

"You snooze you lose" anti nap propaganda, changing it to "you snooze yaaaaayyyyyy yippeeeee"

[jennamoran]

this is going to be a controversial one but I think the optimal number of cats for facilitating making the bed is not, in fact, "every cat in the house" but perhaps even ... zero

[rickybabyboy]

dangerous misinformation

[draconym]

Me: Fuck, the paper towels I want are on the top shelf.

The Sir David Attenborough That Lives In My Brain: Being smaller-than-average presents an added challenge to foraging ... but necessity is the mother of invention. A little creativity turns a baguette into a tool, and voilà--

(paper towel roll falls on my face)

Sir David Attenborough, pleasantly: Success.

[spiribia]

dude why did you just walk up to me and quicksave

[mx-capgras]

this will stay in my ask box forever. i have never enjoyed an ask so much as i have enjoyed this one

[rosedavid]

i hate it when you're heating something up in the microwave and it starts to go snap crackle pop so you take it out but it's still completely cold. shut up then??