MomLists

Lists About Motherhood Posted in Public Places

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Hello! Thank you for visiting! The way Tumblr works is you’re reading the most recent #MomList first (AKA the last of all 150 lists), titled “The Beginning” (just to make things really confusing!).

To read #MomLists in the order they were created, scroll all the way down to the bottom. The very first list is “Ways I Was Productive While My Son Was at Day Care Today.”

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3 years ago, I started the #MomLists public art project, posting these autobiographical lists about motherhood (and turning them into art pieces) in public places -- 50 in Berkeley, 50 in Oakland, 50 in San Francisco. My son, now 5 years old, is hilarious, smart, incredibly sensitive and caring. He also gives me a hell of a time. 2 years into the project I had a daughter. But it's my son who has been my muse for this project. He is larger than life and it made sense to me to close out this portion of #MomLists with his birth. I'm not sure what I'll do with this project online. I love posting and connecting. I really love the guestlists. I may just post randomly. We'll see how it evolves. But a big shout out to all my friends and family and new virtual friends and followers who have enjoyed and contributed and supported me and my art in a variety of ways. When this gets published into a book, you all will be the first to know:) ❤️❤️❤️❤️Minna Here's #MomLists San Francisco 50 -- "The Beginning."

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Here's #MomLists San Francisco 49 - "The Need to Feed." It's amazing how quickly (and slowly) things change with children. I wrote list 2 weeks ago when I was at a fever pitch of frustration. We have made some huge changes in our approach to food with the guidance of a good book. Here is a list of food my son tried this week, all of which he hasn't touched in months, years, or ever: carrots, chocolate croissant, plain white milk, pumpkin muffin, scrambled eggs, jasmine rice, spaghetti, penne pasta, grated Parmesan cheese, Ritz crackers, Club crackers, strawberry yogurt. There is a food revolution happening in my house. I could die from pride and relief. I know his palate will close up again, but goddamn I'm enjoying this.

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Here's #MomLists San Francisco 48! "A (Child) Layer of Filth". Parenthood is just a groundhog day of wiping. Also, how come no one told me how many years potty training takes? There are so many levels of clean! Children are filthy animals. Thank god they're so cute!

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Here's #MomLists San Francisco 47! "Breastfeeding: Amicable Separation or Heartbreak." Hugs to all the mamas trying to feed those babies in whatever way works. Even those big kids who refuse all the foods and only want pancakes all day erryday. No, I don't know anyone like that. Also, I stamped this list upside down. That's two lists in a row I've done something upside down. Interpretations?

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Here’s #MomLists San Francisco 46 – “A Day’s Worth of ‘Sorrys’”. Also, and fittingly, I sewed this one upside down. I considered rewriting it and redoing the whole thing (perfectionist that I am) but then I was like, “Wait, this is perfect.” Sorry not sorry!

For pics of sewing screwup, go to @momlists on Instagram.

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Hi all! Shit's gotten real over here! We're talking about birth and death in my house a lot lately. I'm so into it. I love seeing my son trying to make sense of the order of things. Here's #MomLists San Francisco 45. Also, holy shit, only 5 more lists til I'm done San Francisco!! .

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Here is #MomLists San Francisco 44! "Love Is in the Details". Guest lists wanted, guys! Please submit your own momlists! I love getting and sharing your experiences of motherhood! Guidelines are at www.minnadubin.com/contact

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Over winter break I got to see some of my dearest friends from summer camp (“the camp girls” I call them, but I know it should be “camp women”…Mayim Bialik would be pissed!). We spent about 8 weeks a year together from age 9-21 at a cult-like youth-movement Jewish camp that had its issues but also made all of us good people. Being with them is like standing in front of a time-lapse mirror–I see the ways I’ve changed and the ways I’ve stayed the same, the roads I didn’t choose, etc. It’s a teeny bit painful but mostly it’s the best. Here’s #MomLists San Francisco 43 – “Old Friends Reunion”.

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My son turned 5 this week, my daughter turned 1 today. I cannot believe I am "a mother of two." I alternate between feeling very seasoned and experienced and feeling totally at sea and like each new phase is an experiential masters degree program...and I'm not sure I'm passing. Because of my son having SPD (see last post on Sensory Processing Disorder), he is physical with other kids. He has good weeks and bad ones. I always feel anxiety picking him up and getting "the report." Unless you have a kid with these kinds of issues, you probably don't realize how wonderful getting no report at pickup is. Here's #MomLists San Francisco 41 - "Preschool Pick-up PTSD".

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In June my 4-year-old son was diagnosed with sensory processing disorder. It's hard to explain what it is and how it manifests. I now know that a lot of his behavior issues (and using his hands when he's upset) that he's had for YEARS are part of it. It took til 2 weeks ago when his preschool called an emergency board meeting to kick him out, for me to realize how much it affects him and how much I need to write about my experience. Here's #MomLists San Francisco 40 -- "Sensory Processing Disorder."

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Someone on FB asked me to write about how I feel about my postpartum body. And I have to say it was really challenging. My body is a vulnerable place for me. I wrote enough content to shape into 3 lists. I've edited it down to 2 and I'm still unsure if I can share the 2nd one. But here's the first. More about what having a postpartum body is like as opposed to how I feel. Here's #MomLists San Francisco 38 -- "My Postpartum Body." Happy holiday to everyone. Hope you get a little warm and cozy family/friends time. And also some pie. And also a break. Grateful for this forum and all of you who respond and share and connect.

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Having kids has really challenged the ways I think about gender. I notice the rigidity of gender expectations in the world, and also my own rigidity. Here's #MomLists San Francisco 37 -- "The Absence of Pink".

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Happy Friday! Just made it under the wire to get a list up this week! Thanks to those of you who've sent in guest lists! They're so great! Keep 'em coming! People always say how important it is to have mom friends when you're a mother. It is nice, but (like everything with motherhood) it's complicated! To all my besties with kids: I miss you and your adorable babies! On the real real though, I miss ALL my friends! Here's #MomLists San Francisco 36 -- "Reasons Why You and Your Best Mom Friend Never See Each Other". (Can we call best mom friends BMFs?)

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Here's #MomLists San Francisco 35!

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All this #metoo stuff has been swirling in my head. The list I began writing of verbal and physical assaults, the workplace sexism, was just too long. I started thinking about what we learn and how (scarily) young we learn it. Sending love to all of you struggling from this #metoo stuff. It's so powerful and so hard. Here's #MomLists San Francisco 34 -- "Learning Gender."