Tutant Meenage Needle Teetles

Who am I? Who are you? Who's driving this thing?

[cuppydogshane]

crucially important that the centaurs overwhelming response to their first full week of Shane is oh my god ilya why didnt you SAY he was so fucking funny

[maxxie-or-smth]

goddddd and i just UGH but also UGHHHHH and aughhhh.... oughhhhhhhhh...... ACK !!! and.... aghhhhhhhh. ughhhhh ! UGH !!!!! and i can't even because AGHHHHHHH. UGHHH

[bowlby4]

[tinylilhollander]

During the post-cottage era when Ilya's still playing for Boston, Shane sends Ilya a text one night that's just like "Are you alone?"

And Ilya is like "No I'm out for drinks with the guys. Did you not see that we won, Hollander?"

And Shane texts back like "Of course I saw, that's why I'm texting." Then a few seconds later: "Download this app right now. Be discreet." with an app store link. And Ilya texts back like '??? 🤨 Shane, have you been hacked?'

And Shane is like 'Just download the fucking app, asshole. This is your reward. Username is Jane2481. Fucking HURRY.'

And when Ilya follows the link and finds out that it's the app that controls a vibrating butt plug, he nearly blacks out at the table before disappearing for a suspiciously long smoke break.

[boccher]

penis poll

ball

dick

ball

Voting ended onMay 25

[eel-in-a-glass]

CASTRATION BAYBEEEEEEEE

[free-my-mindd]

[kingbedlam]

[reallyreallyreallytrying]

all roads lead to road dude. and when in road do as the rodents do.

[shrekhollander]

Jade Pike: *Hayden, Shane and Jackie are inside the house getting food and Ilya is outside with the Pike kids and Anya* Uncle Shane, Uncle Ilya had an accident in the car... Ruby is helping him.

Shane and Hayden: *They get super concerned and get outside fast af because Ilya was showing off his Porsche to the kids, they immediately head out to see what happened*

Ilya: *Is stuck inside this thing*

[hudsonswilliams]

hudson williams + glasses (1/2)

[hays-code-evader]

Reading the Wikipedia pages for 1910s films is like

"Made on a budget of $75, the film was an unexpected smash hit, selling out theaters across the country. Thought lost after a vault fire in Paris in 1954, a full print was discovered in a Brazilian nursing home in 2013, where it was being used as a doorstop."

[evanzbuck]

The Long Game — Chapter Nineteen | insp.

[wearewatcher]

Why did Shane ask a Wedding painter to paint art of him and Ryan?

it's just nice to have around the office

[wearewatcher]

just nice to have aroooooound!

[wehaveourdragons-deactivated201]

[characterlimit]

a show about a hospital

[felixcloud6288]

Listening to a podcast

"Let's take a word from our sponsor."

*Skip ahead a minute* "You can-"

*Skip ahead a minute* "Use code-"

*Skip ahead a minute* "300,000-"

*Skip ahead a minute* "300,000-"

*Skip ahead a minute* "T-shirts-"

*Skip ahead a minute* "Motherfuck-"

*Go back 15 seconds*

[felixcloud6288]

Oh we're all feeling this one aren't we?

[kitsuleif]

[earhartsease]

and that much ado? it's about nothing

[knucklecurve]

filthy, filthy read

[ap-kinda-lit]

Goblin shark seen alive in natural habitat for the first time: "The most iconic of all the deep-sea sharks"

The goblin shark had only previously been seen when caught by fishermen and they died shortly afterward.

So this is what a Goblin Shark actually looks like…

I love it

[bogleech]

[ragehangover]

the other thing ill say is it could have been very interesting for reid to address the rapid and inexplicable changes to shane’s personality at the end of the long game (immediately overcoming his disordered eating, not wanting to watch the stanley cup finals, passively forgiving everyone offscreen, being excited to play in ottawa without complications) as like……. shane is experiencing a severe dissociative episode.

shane — who at this point has spent the entire book being told by literally everyone that he needs to be less mopey and anxious and to support ilya’s life more — fully compartmentalises everything and pushes all of it down. he’s never been happier, truly. yes he’d love to host the centaurs at his new house without warning. he’d love to do a photoshoot. he’d love to post a video on instagram. he’d love to be the butt of the joke. look how much fun he’s having. this is great. he just needs to be less worried about everything and it’ll all work out. ilya will take care of it. he just needs to go to the back of the line. yes, he wants another slice of chocolate cake please and thank you

ideally i think. ilya and his parents would perhaps slowly catch on that the bizarre stepford wife act is in fact a coping mechanism and shane hollander the person is in fact grieving in total freefall. itd be nice for other characters to objectively look at the situation and think. man i can’t believe we were mad at shane for getting threatened by the commissioner of the nhl or being outed twice over or being accused of cheating and losing both his professional career and his reputation. but in the meantime shane is doing just awesome thanks for asking.