a/n: long time no post! got over a severe writer's block and past midterms #weresoback
After the eventful weekend, Lena found herself in Professor Smith’s class again. It was almost midterms, so they were going over the last unit before the exam, the Titan Wars.
“The Titan Wars started around the year 1304 AD. It was between two groups, the first, known as the Devils, had been colonized and severely oppressed for hundreds of years while the other maintained an advantage over them. The second group had technology the first didn’t have, which historians have come to call the Warriors. These weapons helped them make sure they didn’t act out.”
Lena felt a pang go through her head, though she ignored it as she continued taking notes.
“After hundreds of years of this, the Devils were able to further their technology and produce weapons that were able to beat the Warriors. This was the start of a series of brutal and bloody battles. For many years, they went back and forth attacking each other on different territories, but mostly on the island where the Devils lived.”
Goosebumps shot across her arms as chills ran through her body. Lena felt a strange coldness wash over her, it was comforting in an odd way.
“But one day, it became a worldwide genocide. The scale of their violence killed 80% of the population and flattened countless cities and cultures.”
As quickly as the coldness came, it was replaced by suffocating, fiery heat. Lena gasped, rubbing at her arms, trying to get rid of the burning feeling. She tightly closed her eyes and took a few deep breaths, but much to her avail it didn’t help. When her eyes flickered open, she was seeing flashes of a port and a mass of huge skinless beings coming toward her.
“Hey, what’s wrong?” Hitch asked, placing her hand on Lena’s arm.
The touch grounded Lena slightly, but she could only shake her head in response, still horrified by what she saw.
“It was a horrible tragedy, the effects of which are surely still felt today.” Professor Smith continued. “Are there any questions on what was covered today? I will be sending out the study guides tonight for your exam later this week.”
Lena pressed her palms into her eyes, rubbing aggressively. “I-I’m okay, I might just still be hungover.”
Hitch frowned. “You’re never hungover for that long, are you sure-”
“Yes,” Lena snapped, “I don’t want to talk about it.” Something about what she had seen felt so real, but she didn’t want to think on it.
Shrugging, Hitch stood and put her backpack on. “Whatever you say. I’ll see you back at the apartment later, I have to run to office hours for Dok’s lecture.”
Lena nodded, still a little dazed as they parted ways from the classroom.
Hitch had been walking to her car after office hours when the sight of someone caused her to stop in her tracks.
“Hitch?”
“Hey, Jean. Long time no see.” Hitch laughed dryly, “I heard you’re getting awful close to my roommate.”
Jean frowned, “You make it sound like a bad thing, I-”
“I’m just teasing,” Hitch snorted. “I’m glad you guys reconnected, it took long enough for you to find each other.”
The tips of Jean’s ears turned pink as he tried to stutter out a response.
“There is something I wanted to talk to you about,” Hitch said, her tone suddenly becoming serious. “I can tell she’s been getting a lot of flashbacks, but I don’t think she fully remembers.”
Jean nodded. “There’s been a few situations where I can tell it triggered something, but it isn’t enough for her to gain all her memories back.”
“I’m pretty sure something from Smith’s made her remember something, she froze up and got really spacey. I just couldn’t tell what she was remembering.”
“What was Smith saying when it happened?” Jean asked, frowning. “I knew I shouldn’t have skipped today.”
Hitch scratched her head, “Not sure what specifically, but we were talking about the Titan Wars.”
“There’s a few things she could’ve remembered and none of them good.” Jean paled, “Did she say anything?”
“She just told me she was fine and was probably still hungover. She actually got really irritated at me, so I’m not sure what that’s about.” Hitch frowned.
“Promise me you’ll keep an eye on her, I think she’s getting close to remembering how she died. She’s going to need someone around after that, even if it’s just a flashback and not regaining her memories.”
Hitch nodded, her gaze falling to her shoes. “I guess I didn’t know her in that life, I…I really hope it isn’t as painful for her in this one.”
Jean put his hand on her shoulder. “Hey, it’s okay. I’m sure she’ll appreciate you being there for her now.”
Hitch gave him a small smile, before exchanging numbers in case anything else happened. She felt a little more hopeful about Lena’s situation, especially after knowing everyone else was going to be there to help her when everything came back.
–
Lena had been walking back from getting lunch when she passed the biology building. She paused and stared at the big wooden doors. Something in her said to go in, despite having a lot of work to get. Her legs seemed to have a mind of their own as she walked in and took in the new building. The ceilings were high and the lights were almost sterile. There were chairs scattered throughout the entryway and hallway, which led to the staircase.
Lena glanced down behind her as she went up the stairs to the second floor. She passed classrooms and offices until she found a common area with tables and couches. As she looked around the room, a poster on the wall captured her attention. It was an illustration of a long centipede entity with the words “The Source of All Living Matter.”
Lena frowned, she’d never seen that type of bug before but something about it intrigued her.
“Hey! You don’t usually stop by this part of campus.” Hange’s voice rang out from behind her.
Lena jumped and quickly turned to greet them, only to be faced with a change of scenery. She was in a dark office, it had papers and books strewn across the floor and various surfaces. Behind a stack of books sat Hange, who was furiously writing in a journal. She felt frozen as she just watched the scene play out, not able to stop anything coming from her mouth.
“I got done early and figured I’d come to see how your research has been going.”
Hange smiled as they finished whatever they had been writing and closed their journal with a satisfied sigh. “Well, we have some evidence pointing to titans losing energy at night. Which we might be able to use to our benefit when we venture outside the walls.”
Lena felt herself smiling. “That’s wonderful! That could help lower the number of casualties on each mission.”
Hange nodded enthusiastically. “That’s what I’m hoping for. We’ll have to continue researching with Sawney and Bean. We’re going to put tents over them and see how they react to the lack of light.”
Lena nodded, though the vision of Hange at their desk began fading and went black. Once it focused again, she was back in the library staring at the poster on the wall. She sighed, getting used to the bouts of weird memories.
“Hey! You okay?” Hange’s voice called, this time her vision stayed in the present.
Lena nodded, shaking her head. “You know how it is with classes and stuff. Been thinking about the seventy page reading Professor Smith assigned.”
Hange nodded understandingly, “He always did enjoy reading.”
Lena frowned in confusion, but before she could say anything Hange interrupted again.
“We knew each other in undergrad, though I didn’t think we’d end up teaching at the same school.”
“Funny how life works out,” Lena said, brow furrowed. Something seemed off, but she couldn’t place it.
“So, what brings you to the biology building?” Hange asked, shifting their papers to their other arm.
“I’m actually not sure.” Lena paused, “I’ve never been here before, I guess I was just curious.”
“Hm. Well, welcome!” Hange smiled brightly, gesturing for Lena to follow. “My office is this way.”
As Lena entered, she glanced around, taking in the chaotic interior which seemed to match Hange’s personality. There were open books haphazardly placed and papers strewn across every surface. Though there seemed to be a method to the mess.
“This is where I spend most of my time.” Hange said excitedly. “Though I grade a lot of papers, I still have a lot of time for researching.”
Lena gestured to the pile of papers on their desk. “What are you researching now?”
“Pathology! I’ve been researching certain pathogens and how they evolved, eventually leading to infectious epidemics. I’ve been specifically looking at civilizations from the late 1200s. There was an outbreak that wiped out almost half of their populations, so I'm trying to figure out what disease it was and why it was so dangerous. My guess is that after being colonized, they were exposed to a virus that their body hadn’t built a prior tolerance for. But that wouldn’t make sense, because they didn’t have contact with other groups of people until after the turn of the 14th century.” Hange scratched their chin. “Oh, I’m just talking your ear off!”
Lena shook her head, “That’s so interesting, I didn’t even realize things like that could be tracked so long ago.”
“Isn’t it? And we can use that to see future trends!” This will also help us to further understand the way our bodies function and what precautions we can take to protect against disease.” Hange smiled, “It all ties together somehow!”
“Yeah…everything is always connected.” Lena gave them a small smile. “I’ve been feeling that way lately. I don’t know how to explain it, but I feel like I’ve been having the weirdest sense of deja vu.”
Hange’s expression dropped slightly, their head turning in a doglike way. “Do you remember-”
The door opened suddenly, interrupting what Hange was going to ask.
“You didn’t answer my text about lunch, but they had your favorite so I…grabbed some.” Moblit trailed off, feeling the energy in the room.
Lena waved, as her vision flashed and their outfits changed. The casual attire switched to green capes and gear strapped to their waist. It disappeared as quickly as it appeared.
Moblit smiled at her as he sat down at Hange’s desk.
“I should go,” Lena mumbled. “It was nice to talk to you and get the tour.”
Hange gave them a bright smile through their sandwich. “As always, I’m here if you need anything.”
Lena left the building feeling weirder than she did after Smith’s lecture. Her eyes swept her surroundings out of habit. Standing next to the sidewalk, she noticed the blond guy from the party the other night, Reiner. Next to him was another blond man, though he had a beard, and a tall dark haired guy she hadn’t seen before. Behind them was a short guy with an undercut and a girl with messy black hair.
Lena winced as her head began to ache, feeling pretty similar to her hangover on Sunday morning. She started walking down the quad past them to her next class.
She tried to ignore the group staring at her as she went by, glancing at them out of the corner of her eye.
Reiner’s eyes were wide as he watched, while the rest of the group had curious expressions on their faces.
Though Lena didn’t notice the bearded one. Rather than curiosity on his face, it was filled with a sinister look. A smirk spread on his lips and his eyes narrowed.
“Hey!”
Lena froze midstep and turned her head slowly, her brow raised. “Can I help you?”
“You’re that guy's sister, right?” The man’s eyes glinted.
Reiner grabbed his arm, “Zeke, what-”
Zeke shook it off, not sparing a glance at him. “Tell him we say hello. Marco, I mean.”
Lena’s heart dropped and she sucked in a breath. “How do you-”
“Hey, Lena!” A voice interrupted.
Glancing up, she saw Connie walking towards her.
“I’m so glad I found you, we were about to be late for class. We do not need another tardy from Pixis.” He grabbed her arm and practically dragged her down the sidewalk, shooting a dirty look behind him.
“Who are they? I’ve only seen them at parties, but I must’ve had a class with some of them because they seem so familiar.” Lena frowned. “I know the one guys name is Reiner, but-”
“They’re bad news, I wouldn’t go near them.” Connie shook his head, “Zeke is the one with the beard, he’s the ‘ringleader.’ I’ve never heard anything good about him.”
Lena stayed quiet as she thought back to what he said. You’re that guy’s sister. How would he know about Marco?
“Hello? Earth to Lena,” Connie waved his hand in front of her face. “I lost you for a second there. As I was saying, the group is hanging out at our place in a bit if you wanted to come.”
“Sure, I have to give Jean notes from Smith’s today anyway.” Lena smiled.
-
Tonight they were playing board games, starting with Clue.
“Armin! It’s cheating if you keep track of who guesses what.” Sasha groaned, trying to cover her own sheet.
“You say it’s cheating, I say it’s strategic.” Armin said with a coy smile.
Jean glanced at Lena, shaking his head. “I don’t understand why they take this game seriously anyway. Armin is always going to win.”
Lena laughed, listening to Connie and Sasha argue over the pieces.
Jean elbowed her gently, leaning in to say something but her vision changed once more.
Lena felt an elbow in her ribs, she glanced over with a scowl. “What?”
“You’re making it too obvious,” Sasha whispered, “he’s gonna notice.”
“Pff, he’s the most oblivious person here, next to Connie.” Lena rolled her eyes.
Sasha shrugged, “Don’t say I didn’t warn you.”
Lena ignored her and went back to playing with her food, her head resting in her hand. She was trying to pretend Jean wasn’t blatantly fawning over Mikasa. Even after everything that went on between them that night, that wasn’t something they’d do platonically. Yet Jean never mentioned it, it was as if it never even happened.
“Look at Jean blushing!” Connie laughed, shaking her from her thoughts. “You’re in deep.”
“I am not!” Jean argued, his face reddening even more.
Everyone at the table laughed at his flustered expression, his reactions betraying his words. Jean groaned before covering his face with his hands.
Lena rolled her eyes, wanting nothing more than to get away from their endless jokes and teasing.
“Lena!” Marco called, “Walk with me back to the bunks.”
Lena huffed as she passed Sasha her tray and stood.
“What’s wrong?” Marco asked once they were far enough away from the mess hall.
“Nothing, just tired.”
Marco turned to her with a raised brow, “I’ve known you for what? 14 years? As if I wouldn’t know you’re lying.”
Lena groaned in embarrassment. “Fine, but you can’t tell anybody this.”
Marco nodded, holding out his pinky, something they’d done ever since they were kids.
Lena looped her pinky with his before sighing. “Don’t laugh, but I like Jean.”
“I know.”
“Wait, what?”
“I could tell, it’s not that obvious. At least not to Jean, but for me it is.”
“This is so embarrassing!” Lena threw her hands up.
“I’m just that good of a brother,” Marco grinned.
“Stop it,” Lena mumbled, burying her face in her hands.
Marco’s expression became thoughtful. “You know, Jean isn’t the best at expressing his emotions. Comes off as cocky more often than not. But I think something in him likes you.” He concluded.
Lena gave him a dumb look, “Oh he definitely does, especially with the way he is always staring at Mikasa.”
Marco shrugged, “I’m just stating what I observe.”
Lena sighed, “I don’t know. I’m not getting my hopes up that anything will happen.”
Marco shrugged again, “Who knows what’ll happen. I’m just saying, don’t throw it all away for no reason.
When Lena’s vision shifted and she was back in the living room she saw Jean looking at her, an almost expectant look on his face. “You okay?”
Lena’s face turned red, thinking about what she had just seen. “I’m fine, it’s been a long day so I’m kind of spacey.”
Nodding, Jean gave her a small smile before turning back to the game. Lena tried hard to convince herself he didn’t look disappointed.
"the sea might look like the colour of the youth's eyes, who blinking turned his back. Or else, that which will never open again, the colour of Erwin's eyes as well"
a/n: hey everyone! this was my first time trying out writing smut lol and ofc it had to be a miche fic :p
word count: 1.2k
summary: You decide to tease Miche during training, but it doesn't end well for you.
It was late afternoon and you and Miche were stuck training the new cadets. It was one of the hottest days in a long time and it was a mess.
“Cadets! Take five! Make sure you go get water.” Miche ordered, gesturing for you to follow him to a shady spot.
You wiped your brow. “Why is it so hot today? It’s never this bad this time of year.”
Miche shrugged, “I don’t know but it’s making this more miserable than it needs to be.”
“Is there any way we could end early?”
Miche shook his head. “Erwin has all of us on a tight schedule, we need this day of training.”
You groaned, slumping against a tree. The fabric of your shirt kept sticking to your skin, making the heat suffocating. With a sigh, you stripped off your top until you were left in your sports bra, immediately feeling better. You glanced up, catching Miche’s stare. “What?”
“Don’t you think that’s inappropriate?” Mike mumbled, his cheeks brushed with pink.
You raised a brow. “Oh, is this distracting you?”
Miche was attempting to look anywhere else. “No, I-”
Smirking, you stood in front of Miche, sensing his nerves. You crossed your arms, bringing his attention to your chest. “Well, if we ended early I would put my shirt back on. Unfortunately though, I don’t think that’s going to happen.”
You took a step closer to Miche, dragging your finger down his clothed chest.
Miche cleared his throat, “Like I said, Erwin told me-”
Cutting him off, you traced your finger across his belt, watching as his face flushed. “Hm, I think it’s been more than five minutes.”
Miche gulped, his eyes moving from your chest to your eyes a few times. “I’ll call the Cadets back.”
After another few hours of working in the blistering heat, training was wrapping up for the day. You had felt Miche’s eyes on you every once in a while, but could never catch him looking at you.
Once Miche had gotten done giving the Cadets a few reminders, they were dismissed. You watched as everyone practically sprinted inside.
As the courtyard emptied, Miche walked over. “Good work today, I think Erwin will be pleased.”
You nodded as you grabbed your bag. “I hope so, I think I watched the life drain from those cadets.”
Miche snorted and shook his head as you made your way to the door that led to the Scout’s headquarters. “I’ll see you at the meeting later?”
After your goodbyes, you quickly made your way to the showers. You took your time scrubbing the sweat and grime from your body and enjoying the cold water against your sunburnt skin before getting out. You wrapped yourself in a towel and stood in front of the small mirror as you brushed your hair. The door creaked as someone walked in.
Miche came around the corner, a towel loosely held around his waist.
“Oh,” His face turned red as he stopped at the sight of you.
You turned to face him, brow raised. “I must’ve really made an impression on you earlier.”
Miche was quiet as he looked at you, his eyes foggy.
You smirked, walking closer. “Are you just that speechless?”
Miche’s stare was unwavering as he observed you. His eyes followed the droplets of water going down your collar bones before quickly shifting back to your face.
You turned pink as you crossed your arms, unknowingly drawing his eyes lower. “Well?”
Miche let out a shaky breath as his gaze moved upwards, pausing for only a second on your lips before he met your gaze.
You felt heat rise in your core as you kept his stare, his green eyes clouded with lust. You glanced at his lips for a split second before you felt yourself take a step closer to him. His warm breath brushed your face as your eyes fluttered closed and your lips brushed together.
Miche groaned into the kiss, looping his arm around your waist to pull you closer. Your bodies pressed together tightly as he pressed his tongue into your mouth. Your breath hitched as he began kissing his way down your neck, nipping at your collar bone.
When he reached the top of your towel, he glanced up at you and his hand brushed the top of your breast. “Please?”
Your cheeks burned as you nodded, hands feverishly yanking your towel off.
Miche’s mouth fell open slightly as he took you in. His breath quickened as he ran his fingers down your side and across your stomach, then trailing them up to your chest. You gasped as he took them in his hands, his rough fingers playing with them.
His eyes were hungry as he kissed your cheek softly before making his way down your body. You gasped as you felt his lips wrap around your hardened buds, taking them in his mouth and sucking on them. You throbbed more with every touch and you felt your cunt get wetter.
Miche pulled back and took in your disheveled appearance. Your lips met as he picked you up and placed you on the counter. Heat pooled between your legs as you felt him pressing into you. Gripping your hips, he put his head in your neck and inhaled you. He groaned as he rubbed himself against you, feeling the warmth against his member.
You pushed Miche back and tugged on his towel. Taking a step back, he let his towel fall with a smirk. You let out a small gasp at the sight of his length. You felt yourself clenching for him, your body wanting nothing more than to feel his cock rubbing against your walls.
Miche didn’t go back to kissing you, instead he got on his knees and started kissing and biting your thigh. He stopped right before he got to you, pulling away with an unreadable expression. “Can I taste you?”
Any teasing you had over Miche was gone as you begged, clenching your thighs together. “Please, I need you.”
That was exactly what he wanted to hear. Your back arched as his tongue was on you in an instant, languidly licked your folds, though purposely missing the one spot you needed him most.
“Miche, please.” You whined, squirming against his face.
You felt Miche smirk against your core as his tongue flicked across your swollen clit. You were throbbing as he continued to play with you, not giving you the satisfaction you wanted.
Miche pulled away after a few moments of teasing and wiped his face with the back of his hand. “I love the way you taste.”
“Asshole,” You panted. “That’s not fair.”
Miche shrugged as he picked up his towel again. “You were teasing me earlier, so I was just returning the favor. Now if you don’t mind, I’m going to take a shower.”
You covered your face with a groan as he turned the corner. That meeting was going to be awkward later.
when everyone knows you're Levi's – everyone except you...
Kenny has known since you were both kids. Just two brats he'd taken under his wing in the Underground (why he'd done that, he still doesn't even know himself). Kenny knew you were Levi's when he saw the way the runt would always stay close, moving when you moved as if some invisible string were tying you together. Levi would always make sure you ate first, that you were always warm, always safe. It was also during that time when Kenny realised that, even with his own shit influence, the runt would turn out alright.
Isabel and Furlan have known since before Levi knew himself. They noticed the way that, in a room full of people, Levi's eyes would always seek you first. When you spoke, he'd listen with an intensity so unlike the usual disinterest he showed towards most other people. When you were separated for some reason – maybe, you were with another team during a heist, or just out for an errand – Levi's shoulders were tense, he was snappy, on edge, and overall unpleasant to be around. But it only lasted until he saw you again, safe.
Mike has known from the moment he saw Levi's eyes widen with pure terror when you'd been held at knife-point. It was that day when the Scouts had finally caught Levi's infamous gang in the Underground. It was almost comical how fast Levi dropped his dagger and let himself get dragged to his knees, then shoved right into a puddle of sewer filth. Especially now, when Mike knows how much that guy hates filth, he marvels at how Levi didn't even seem to notice it – no, his attention was solely focused on you, and first when the immediate threat to your life had been removed had he looked at Erwin.
Erwin and Hange learned that you were Levi's shortly after you both joined the Scouts. You were always seen together – during training, meals, and every other time of the day. They noticed that, unlike with others, Levi was always patient with you. He'd spar with you, even though he was much better at it than you were (you were still remarkably good, it was just that no one was as good as Levi), and he'd show you a move again and again and again just so you could learn it, never raising his voice at you and always answering your questions. And he didn't express even the tiniest hint of annoyance during those moments – only a softness in his eyes they would've described as adoration, if that word wasn't so strange when associated with Levi.
The Levi Squad also quickly learned that you were his. At first, they'd thought that the rumours about Levi being an aloof asshole were wrong. How could he be, with the way he acted around you – talking more than they'd ever heard him talk before, smiling like it was natural to him, letting you hold his hand, hug him, and kiss his cheek as if the two of you were a happily married couple. However, it didn't take long for them to realise that he was every bit as grumpy as rumours had claimed him to be – not quite an asshole, but still blunt and private. That is, to everyone but you.
The revelation had spurred Petra to casually ask how long you and Levi had been together. To their surprise, Levi had fallen very silent, while you spluttered and waved your hands frantically in front of yourself. "No no, I promise it's not like that! We've just known each other since we were kids!"
Petra was sceptical, Oluo confused, and Eld and Gunther exchanged looks. Later, they asked Hange about it, but they'd just pinched the bridge of their nose, mumbling something along the lines of, "If that idiot doesn't tell them soon, I'm going to ask them out myself. That should get him going."
But after that day, you notice that Levi suddenly starts acting strange around you for some reason. He'll get very still every time you hug him or get too close, something he's never done before. When you ask him about it, he doesn't say anything at first, so you ask if you did something wrong.
That seems to catch his attention, and he immediately pulls you close. "Don't be an idiot. It's not you, it's me."
You laugh a little at that. "You know, it sounds like you're breaking up with me when you put it like that." You say it as a joke of course, but it seems like Levi is taking your statement very serious.
"To break up, you have to be together first, you know."
"Right. But you never really saw me like that," you muse, looking away and trying to sound like you don't care when, really, your heart hurts just thinking about it
Again, Levi doesn't say anything, so you look at him again – only to find him staring at you as if you've suddenly grown an extra head.
"Huh? Was it something I said?"
He groans loudly. "You really are an idiot." Then, he flicks your forehead. "I always liked you, dumbass. It used to drive me mad – no, scratch that, it does drive me mad. You drive me mad, but in the best fucking way."
Your eyes light up. "Really?"
"Don't make me say it again."
"Does that mean I can kiss you?"
Levi blinks in surprise, his lips parting. Then, he quickly snaps his mouth shut, only for it to spread into a smirk a split second later. "I'd be pretty fucking stupid to say no to that, wouldn't I?"
You agree wholeheartedly, right before leaning in to kiss Levi. Right on the mouth.
There was an emptiness in Dahlia Bodea that she was not equipped to fill.
A gaping maw that only deigned to echo her own sticky grief in tenfold stereo. Mixed in perfect balance with the choking guilt and despair spilling from the counterpart of her soul.
Yin. Yang.
Black. White.
Up. Down.
Beginning.
And end.
How... had it come to this?
· · ─ ·❁· ─ · · ▬▬ι═══════ﺤ · · ─ ·❁· ─ · ·
The days passed. A winter vortex blustered and pounded against her bedroom window. Her dissociating gaze imagined curled, icy hands reaching to snare her.
Or was that banging sound the front door? Was that her name being called?
She ignored it. She ate when her stomach demanded it. Slept when her body forced it.
On the fourth day, Connie had had enough. He opened the front door with the spare key she hadn't known existed. The implication of who the young man had to have spoken to made her collapse into herself once again. His strong arms caught her. And with gentle brotherly care, she was encouraged to eat, bathe, and dress.
On the fifth day, the rage hit her lungs first as she roared herself hoarse into her pillow.
On the sixth, she halted herself from marching to headquarters, fire and venom on her tongue. Crescent indents from her nails on the wall edge of the foyer were the only evidence of her restraint.
And on the seventh day...
Dahlia knew she would not be able to look him in the eye without her heart breaking.
All over again.
· · ─ ·❁· ─ · · ▬▬ι═══════ﺤ · · ─ ·❁· ─ · ·
It felt like betrayal when she walked straight into Commander Arlert's office. Her feet screamed at the break of habit as she stepped through and closed the heavy door softly behind her.
Dahlia willed her expression into a blank, almost serene mask as she handed Armin the written request.
His mouth pursed in confused concern as he took it.
Read it. Then read it again, his grip tightening slightly around the paper.
When he looked up, his striking blue eyes shone with such untempered sadness.
She wanted to vomit.
"Are you sure?" he asked quietly.
"Yes, Commander."
"Maybe... maybe we could talk-"
"No, Commander."
Armin swallowed hard, eyes dropping back to the letter.
"Does he know?"
"I'm sure he'll find out."
He tried once more, any pretense of command slipping away, his face so unbearably young.
"But surely, if you both came to an understanding-"
"Armin."
Dahlia's interruption was gentle as a warm hand. Her small, close-lipped smile trembled subtly. Her eyes too bright and raw in the early morning light.
"He cannot be swayed once his mind is made up. And I refuse to bash my head and heart into a brick wall any longer... so..." Her voice cracking at the end despite her best efforts. "Besides... I won't be far."
His eyes glazed over. And with words barely over a whisper, he conceded:
"I'll speak with Captain Mumfred."
· · ─ ·❁· ─ · · ▬▬ι═══════ﺤ · · ─ ·❁· ─ · ·
Word spread quickly.
Mikasa came as soon as the grapevine had reached her.
"I told you." Her face was hard as slate. "I would kill him."
"If he hurt me."
"Or broke your heart."
"He didn't want to do that, Bright Eyes," Dahlia said softly. "Leave it be."
"But-"
"Please."
Mikasa had stared at her for several moments, eyes wide and fists trembling. Then, slowly, reluctantly, the young woman's shoulders slumped in helpless defeat.
"Fine," she muttered. "If that's what you want."
Her acquiescence, however, did not stop her from requesting to spar with humanity’s strongest. Every single day.
Dahlia supposed that was Mikasa’s version of compromise.
She didn’t stick around to hear the rest of the gossip to know who won and who lost.
It hurt too much to keep hearing his name.
· · ─ ·❁· ─ · · ▬▬ι═══════ﺤ · · ─ ·❁· ─ · ·
Captain Mumfred welcomed her with open arms and wasted no time before running her through combat and ODM flight drills.
The physical exertion was a soothing balm to the cacophony behind her ribs. Her body buzzed with excitement as she pivoted and swung. The week's pent-up energy and angst had finally found an outlet.
She'd forgotten the older man's steady eye tracking her until his loud, joyful guffaw startled her with a jolt.
"What in the world were you benched for?" he boomed. “I knew ol' Levi had high standards, but hellfire, small fry! You can move. Did he see you do this? There ain’t no way he'd keep you off the field.”
The sound of his name brought the pounding back so fast she felt it in her tonsils.
Mumfred shook his head, still laughing.
"I haven’t seen anyone fly like that since..." He paused, then barked a laugh. "Well, shit. Since Levi. When he first enlisted about a decade ago. I know he's learned a hell of a lot since then, but still."
Dahlia swallowed hard.
The captain suddenly pivoted, marching off with purpose behind his heels.
"I'm gonna have a talk with him, because if you transferred 'cause you were left behind, we can get him to change his mind and-"
She moved without thinking. Her fingers closed around his wrist, stopping him cold. She kept her face angled down, hiding the emotion threatening to claw free.
'Please don't.'
She hadn’t missed the way his expression softened with quiet, fatherly concern at her soft tone.
By the end of the following week, Captain Mumfred had given her a position in his squad formation with a full training schedule to test team chemistry and communication.
And then, before she could even process what had steamrolled ahead of her, the captain had submitted the papers and...
Dahlia Bodea was an official enlisted military member of the Survey Corps regiment.
It felt strange standing in Commander Arlert’s office as he handed her the newly signed transfer paperwork. Seeing the adjusted pay grade. The designation of a commissioned officer of the Scouts.
She retained her title as logistics officer, even though both the Commander and Captain Mumfred had reiterated over and over that she was Mumfred's lieutenant now.
But it all felt like too much, too quickly. Too-
She saluted and swore in before her Commander. Captain Mumfred stood at her side, smiling with open, unmistakable pride.
And all she could think about... was how badly she wanted to scream.
After the ceremony, she quietly followed Captain Mumfred toward his office as he spoke excitedly about how she'd be getting her own space now.
The words filtered through her as she walked, and thought, and walked, and thought-
Until she softly bonked into a warm, solid surface.
She gasped, flushing with embarrassment.
"I'm so sorry, Captain-”
"Hey."
His warm, drawling voice dropped and softened. His brows pinched together as he looked down at her, easily towering at five-ten over her five-one frame.
"You don't gotta talk about it if you don’t want to," he said quietly. "But... you can talk about it to me. If you like."
She swallowed.
"Not sure what there would be to talk about, sir."
"Hm." He hummed thoughtfully. "Well, you can sit in your silence if you want. That's fine. Ain’t any of my business."
Then he softened further, voice steady and sure.
"But one thing you'll learn about me real quick, small fry, is I take care of my people." He gave her a small, encouraging nod. "So... just think on it, alright?"
Dahlia nodded, and he carried on ahead of her. His words circled lazily in the back of her mind.
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She was set up with an empty office. Connie and Jean did her the kindness of retrieving all of her previous ledgers on Yeagerist activity. She requested only her copies, so her old squad still had everything they’d need.
Mikasa gathered her odds and ends into a box and gently placed it on Dahlia’s new desk, offering a small, sad smile.
The three of them stood there together, looking at her with kind eyes and small, proud smiles. Though... it was tinged with grief.
Jean broke the silence first, clearly trying to smile through it.
"Look at the hotshot," he said. "Own office and everything."
Connie chimed in, his usual energy muted but present.
"Lieutenant Ma-mo," he added. "Got a nice ring to it."
Dahlia rolled her eyes softly, looking at them all with unmistakable fondness, "Stop looking at me like you'll never see me again. I’m down the corridor."
Jean swallowed hard, eyes darting away to hide the telltale gleam of tears.
Mikasa spoke quietly, "We know. It's just…" She trailed off. "It won’t be the same."
"I know, my loves," Dahlia murmured.
They stood there in shared silence, simply looking at one another.
Then Dahlia let out a soft chuckle.
"You all know exactly where I live," she said gently. "And we still have our Fridays. Aye?"
They'd stayed to help her unpack and settle in, chatting softly amongst themselves as they worked. Her fingers pulled out her belongings bit by bit.
Pens.
A half-full, dog-eared notebook.
A cardigan she'd forgotten she'd left behind.
Her heart started to race.
Her fingers brushed against wool, and she froze.
The others noticed her sharp pause and went still as they watched her for a single, fragile beat.
Slowly, Dahlia pulled the navy scarf free, and the broken sob ripped from her throat and passed her lips as soon as Levi's scent hit her.
She slapped a hand over her mouth immediately, eyes screwing shut to hold back the inevitable.
"I'm-"
Her apology didn't get the chance to be heard as arms wrapped around her in a cocoon of steady, unyielding warmth.
On the next breath, she let go, sobbing into them as they anchored her and held her upright.
· · ─ ·❁· ─ · · ▬▬ι═══════ﺤ · · ─ ·❁· ─ · ·
Dahlia had avoided seeing Levi for almost a month. She knew his daily schedule as well as her own ingrained routine. She timed everything around his rounds so as not to risk either of them being blindsided.
The one time she had been careless and hadn't checked the wall clock before heading toward the stables had been the moment the fragile little bubble around her reality popped.
Levi hadn't seen her yet. His attention was fully on Jericho, one hand stroking the horse's muzzle as his forehead pressed close to the beast's own.
Her eyes were wide as they tracked the movement of his lips as he murmured softly to his companion.
Dahlia couldn't breathe. Grief and hot panic crawled up her throat.
She pivoted sharply, sucking in a breath, her chest locking, her eyes stinging-
Jericho's soft, high-pitched whinny cut through the air.
The one he only ever made for her.
She took a quicker step.
She heard his running bootsteps.
No. No, no, she wasn't ready-
"Dahlia."
She froze.
His boots stopped just behind her.
She focused on her breathing, grounding herself the best she could, before she turned.
Her eyes met his after so long.
The first thing that hit her mind was the memory of the bucking, horrid cacophony of their hearts breaking in tandem on her apartment floor.
Dahlia's tongue felt like lead in her mouth.
Levi's light silver eye gleamed in the sunlight of the cool afternoon. His black hair was wind-blown, from running, from the breeze whipping between the stable buildings and the stone walls of headquarters. His cheeks and the tip of his nose blushed with the chill.
His lips were parted. His eyes just a touch too wide. His expression almost terrified the moment would break. That she would disappear.
She swallowed hard around the knot in her throat.
Her voice came out small. Almost fragile.
"Hello."
He just stared at her.
She wondered if he’d even thought about what he would say to her after... everything. Or if he’d acted without thought, just pure instinct dragging him forward before his mind could catch up.
Maybe that was why he looked so scared.
The anamchara bond fluttered wildly between them, disorienting in its intensity. It was so much stronger than it had ever been. Now fully realized between them and impossible to ignore.
Finally, he wet his lips and spoke. His breath hitched, his voice a low rasp.
"How are you?"
Dahlia had no idea how to answer that. It must have shown on her face, because Levi exhaled sharply, rolling his eyes at himself as he dragged a hand down his face.
"Stupid question," he muttered before drawing in a short breath and saying instead, "You transferred."
Dahlia gave a small nod. "Yes."
He nodded in return, jaw working as he bit the inside of his cheek. His gaze lifted briefly to the sky before dropping back to her.
"How are you liking Captain Mumfred’s leadership?"
"Fine. He’s a kind man."
Levi nodded again. "Good."
He cleared his throat softly, then tipped his chin toward the new insignia on her uniform.
"Lieutenant Bodea," he said, his voice still low, almost careful. "Congratulations."
Dahlia swallowed tightly. "...I kept my original title."
Something in Levi's chest visibly hitched. He looked away, as if holding her gaze was suddenly too much. When he spoke again, his voice cracked just enough to betray him.
"You’ve been avoiding me."
She worried her bottom lip, gaze drifting down to their boots. An angry heat started to grasp around her heart.
"...I'm not sure what you expected me to do," she murmured flatly. "Didn't know how to look at you without-"
The rest of the sentence crashed behind her teeth. Too much. She swallowed the knot down hard.
He met her gaze again, his expression tightly restrained. To anyone else, he might have looked pissed off. But she saw the gleam in his eyes. The way he was holding on by a thread.
His words came out in a low rasp.
"Me neither."
Taut beats of silence passed between them. Her eyes stung, emotion threatening to rear up again, but she sniffed it back.
Levi spoke first, "You'll be joining Mumfred’s squad in the field?"
She exhaled, almost relieved at the shift.
"Yes. First mission's next week."
His jaw clenched. Then unclenched. "Where does he have you in formation?"
"Flank," she answered. "To start."
Levi exhaled through his nose and nodded.
"With the expectation," she continued carefully, "that once I understand how they operate, I'll shift to take point with him and Corporal Mateo."
His mouth pulled into a thin line. He clicked his tongue softly against his teeth, correcting himself before he said anything else.
"I see." His boot tapped once against the stone. "Will you still be doing council work?"
"The captain wants me to gain field experience for a few months before returning to the political side," she replied. "The Commander agreed."
Levi nodded woodenly. His gaze lifted back to the sky. "Mumfred’s squad is solid. Should all go smoothly."
Her chest clenched again. The bond bucked sharply between them. They both swallowed at the sensation.
Levi's eyelids shuttered closed as he let out a soft puff of breath. His head bowed slightly, his hand coming up to pinch the bridge of his nose.
His words were barely above a whisper.
"I'm so fucking sorry, Dahlia-"
"Don't."
He stopped. Didn’t open his mouth again. Didn’t drop his hand. Just stood there, braced, and frozen. Clearly not knowing what the fuck to do next.
Dahlia drew in a deep, steadying breath.
"Look at me," she said quietly.
Slowly, his hand fell away. His expression was guarded to the world, but his eyes were raw and exposed to her.
Dahlia took him in. The dark circles beneath his eyes. The faint lines at their corners were more pronounced with exhaustion. The question slipped out before she could stop herself.
"Are you sleeping?"
"Not gettin' fuck all."
"Yeah," she said quietly. "I can tell."
He just looked at her.
Then she deadpanned, "You look like shite."
Levi blinked, then snorted softly.
"Gee," he muttered. "Thanks."
"No problem."
A beat passed.
"I meant what I said, " he whispered, "...I'm still your friend."
She clenched her jaw around the immediate urge to snap at him.
He continued, a wary breath, "...if you want me to be."
"I need time, Levi." The words sharper, harsher than she wanted them to be. She caught the way he flinched unintentionally. She continued in a flat rasp, "I'll stop avoiding you. Frankly, it's starting to impede on what I need to do for work."
He nodded stiffly. Expression pinched and sharp. His eyes and the nauseating tug behind her ribs told the truth of how her words raked at him.
She pulled in a deep, slow inhale through her nose, lids fluttering closed. Trying to quell the stinging venom on her tongue, fighting to be spit out.
Dahlia forced her voice to gentle. "...I am still your friend, Levi." She swallowed. "And as your friend, I am asking for time... to re-build myself. Without you."
She met his gaze again. The pain reflected in his eyes made her stomach twist. Her fingers twitched to draw him into her. To take it back. To comfort. To make the hurt go away.
Dahlia ignored it with a mental right hook to her heart.
Levi swallowed audibly.
"I understand."
She nodded stiffly and let out a shaky breath before stepping around him. But almost like her soul refused to leave it clean, her lips moved before she even registered what she was going to say.
"My office is down the corridor, third door on the left... If you need anything."
And with that, she forced herself to step, one foot after another, toward the stables.
Leaving Levi standing, fists clenching and unclenching at his sides, eyes staring holes into the cracked stone wall. Time passing around him, the world still spinning.
