I’m sorry. He made me do it. I told you. They upset him. They shouldn’t have done that.

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@moriartyfall
I’m sorry. He made me do it. I told you. They upset him. They shouldn’t have done that.
john: i'm chained to the well
john: oh look a rope
I’m just kidding.
this is the most married thing
perfect couple: one person has cold hands, the other has warm hands. together, they maintain the ideal temperature for hand holding
relationship goals: thermodynamic equilibrium
[walks up to a couple] so which of you is the source and which is the sink?
I wish more foods were named in the same vein as “I Can’t Believe Its Not Butter!”
You’ve Got To Be Pulling My Leg, THIS Is Ranch?!
Shut The Fuck Up, Are You Telling Me This Shit Is Ketchup??
I Firmly Believe This Is Not Mustard And I Am Horribly Wrong
I Refused To Believe That This Condiment Was Barbecue Sauce, And I Have Been Summarily Flayed For My Apostasy
I Assigned Negligible Probability To This Being Chili Sauce And Have Since Updated
In Which Your Humble Narrator Assumed That The Substance Within This Container Was Not Worchestershire Sauce Only To Be Rudely Awakened From This Delusion By Mysterious Circumstances
So I Figured This Was Jam But Boy Howdy Was I Jumping To Some Erroneous Goddamn Conclusions
this not soup
So I said to Justin Timberlake, “That is Not Eggnog.”
Fuck. Beans.
I’m Really Concerned This Isn’t Rice
do u ever feel like you’ve accidentally tricked certain people into thinking you are smarter and have more potential than you actually do and do you ever think about how disappointed they’ll be when you inevitably crash and burn
Fun fact: Impostor Syndrome is ridiculously common among high-achievers, particularly women. If you identify with this post, odds are pretty good that you’re exactly as smart as people think you are, and the failure you’re afraid of isn’t inevitable at all.
Even Maya Angelou stated, “I have written 11 books, but each time I think, ‘Uh oh, they’re going to find out now. I’ve run a game on everybody, and they’re going to find me out.’”
Don’t forget this is one of the psychological barriers put in place by thousands of years of patriarchy and male supremacy.
Reblogging again because of new commentary
I still find it really funny that in Rent, Roger’s all like “you look familiar” and Mimi’s response is “maybe you went to the strip club I work at” and not “well you see, I do live in your building, soooo”
Best show ever y/y?
PETITION FOR NETFLIX TO REVIVE PUSHING DAISIES WHO’S WITH ME
Beam him up, Mr. Scott. 💔
Terrible news out of Los Angeles today: Anton Yelchin has died at the age of 27 in a car accident.
“Russian whizkid, what’s your name? Chanko? Cherpov?” “Ensign Chekov, Pavel Andreievich, sir.”
“I think you can always find interesting, complex and fascinating characters to play in different kinds of movies. It’s in your hands.”
R.I.P. Anton Yelchin (March 11, 1989 - June 19, 2016)
I want it to be a hoax so badly.
RIP Anton.
I can do that by ~tillieke
It was a bit of a struggle with the light this time, and the hair once again.
Such terribly sad news about Anton :(
RIP Anton Yelchin.
Before this was a Sherlock blog, this was a Star Trek blog titled "ensignchekhov." Anton was my way back Into the Star Trek fandom. I was such a huge, huge fan of him not only in the reboots but in his incredible body of work as an Actor. I can't believe he had to go and in such a horrific accident that didn't have to happen. I am distraught.
“Did you miss me?"