I love that our main character in Widow’s Bay is essentially the mayor from Jaws.
Stranger Things

@theartofmadeline
Jules of Nature
almost home

shark vs the universe
Sade Olutola

PR's Tumblrdome
Monterey Bay Aquarium

★
One Nice Bug Per Day
No title available
Game of Thrones Daily

#extradirty
Three Goblin Art
Sweet Seals For You, Always

izzy's playlists!

Kaledo Art

Andulka
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"

titsay

seen from United States

seen from South Africa
seen from United States

seen from United States
seen from Austria

seen from Malaysia

seen from United States

seen from Netherlands
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Greece

seen from Malaysia

seen from Hong Kong SAR China

seen from Russia
seen from United States

seen from United States

seen from Brazil

seen from Greece

seen from Poland
seen from United States
@moth-maam56
I love that our main character in Widow’s Bay is essentially the mayor from Jaws.
if an archaeologist says an artifact was probably for “ritual purposes” it means “i have no fuckin clue”
but if they say it was for “fertility rituals” they mean “i know exactly what it was for but i dont want to say ‘ancient dildo’”
Back in the day I worked at a certain very famous and very high caste art museum in the US as a junior curator. Part of my job was to catalog the objects in the museum database. This includes details like provenance, measurements, and a visual description of what the object looked like.
Like I said, the museum was a pretty snotty institution. It’s got a LOT of objects it’s way famous for possessing, but nobody knew about the absolutely massive collection of Moche erotic pottery it had because the curators were totally embarrassed by this stuff.
Some examples:
Pretty hot shit, right? They never, ever put any of this stuff on public view or published it in any catalogues but - we legit had like several hundred pieces of Moche ceramics in the “dirty pots” category. Anyway, I was left alone to just do my job with regard to the database for several years, ok? And I figured, well, these’re accessioned objects in the museum’s collection - better get down to bidness.
I catalogued every goddamn bestiality, necrophiliac, cocksucking, buttfucking, detached penis, and giant vulva drinking cup in that collection. I’d be like,
A drinking vessel in form of a standing man wearing a tunic and cap. He holds an oversized erection in his hands and stares into the distance (note I did not say “like he’s hella-constipated”). The vessel has a hole at both the tip of the penis as well as around the rim of the figure’s head, thus forcing the drinker to drink only from the penis or risk spilling wine all over themselves from the top of the vessel. Red and orange slip covers the surface of the piece.
Pretty straightforward, right? Apparently the deep seated fear of these objects that the curators exhibited was meant to spread to me as well, but - no one ever gave me that memo, because I guess Midwesterners reproduce asexually. When the curators understood that I had catalogued all of these objects in addition to the other, non-sexy pieces in the collection, they were apparently livid, but knew they had no legs to stand on in terms of getting pissed at me for it.
I visited the museum’s online public access database a few years back and - every single description I wrote of these pieces has been totally neutered to say something like Male figural vase.
Long story short? Just call a dildo a fucking dildo. It’s all gonna be ok, I swear.
This is absolutely the MOST unusual reblog I have ever tagged with what is probably my second-favorite tag, “talk to me about your work.”
Plus it’s hilarious.
I love ancient art history !!!!!
@lowercasetrashwriter
Museums should have sections dedicated to artifacts like these with a warning that says “There’s a lot of private parts in here but we’re dedicated to displaying history so we won’t censor these. Enter at your own risk” or something. It’s prudish to deliberately hide history because of some ding dongs.
Fucking Puritanism.
Unpopular opinion: Sex exists. Making body parts taboo is both psychologically bad for us and kinda stupid.
@heretherebefaggots and I went on a trip to Berlin a few months ago and in the Museum of Antiquity they had a little side room just for Artefacts of Love~ (same as they have for burial artefacts and other special occasions) and—
Morning. Here’s the description:
I feel like if humans swallowed rocks like birds do to help grind up food we'd have so much fun with it.
Can just imagine all the girlies on tiktok going "I know this is a bit controversial but I honestly love using limestone as a gastrolith. Not only can you readily forage it but they are just so pretty when smoothed out after regurgitating them"
and then all the comments would be like " girl 😭 😭 calcite dissolves in stomach acid!! Just use quartz if you want a pretty gastrolith like 💀"
I like this site. Y’all just shotgunning counterfactual timelines
he seems to be doing a pretty good job tbh
by Maggie Vandewalle
I think I reblog this every time I see it.
Literally cannot believe I was ever scared of getting older like this is awesome. Learning so many new things about myself & reacting to things that used to get under my skin so differently. This is so sexy.
I think part of getting better is complete ego death. Like you’re not above setting a timer for 5 minutes and focusing on a task. You’re not above doing a very simple 3 minute workout to start. You’re not above reading for 10 minutes a day when you first get out of your reading slump, even if you used to read for hours. You’re not above starting slow and then building up to where you want to be/where you once were. What you are above is total inertia. Doing something really is better than doing nothing. Radically accept where you are, radically accept your limits, and go from there. Don’t let your ego get in the way.
90% of google search ai summaries feel like this guy leaning uncomfortably over your shoulder and pointing at stuff on your screen reading out the exact same text you're already looking at
I just ate one
You can lie when you name things
Shout out to that guy from Florida talking to my coworker about wanting to take his sail boat through Lake Superior in November. He was planning on a little trip and my coworker was like hey man I don't know how to tell you this but you will Actually Die
*Lake Superior, in the far distance*: yes yes yes yes yes do it yes yes
@ciaseeds PLEASE
yeah okay fair point
okay you people CANT just keep being funnier than me on my own post like this
Lake Superior perfect size for sailboat to put in
Inside very calm water very warm very good for sailboat. Comfort sailboat. put sailboat in lake superior
PUT. SAILBOAT. IN. LAKE. SUPERIOR.
"Because I Love You" by Lex Marie.
She spent hours upon hours just beating the canvas with a belt...
when you look at the finished painting, you can almost see letters - but there aren't any. It's all noise. a lot of adults process this sort of beating by insisting there is a lesson in it. with the title and artist statement in mind, it's like they're trying to read a message of love written in that chaotic canvas.
Gorgeous Japanese Firework Illustrations From The Late 1800s