¿? @msderpypants - Tumblr Blog

in the future humans will have something called "sinus button " and pressing it will immediately drain your sinuses of all fluid so that it can be filled with other things like rocks, webs, paint, tar, freef (new fluid that will be so important in that time) and also dr papper

physicfox12

Weird monster who likes soft things

nicolegendary

i knowwwwww in my heart ilya would love taking shanes last name and after they have kids referring to their family unit as hollanders. ilya turning around to the backseat like okey hollanders here is plan. we are going to be in and out of costco in thirty minutes. you may choose ONE item each. if we get separated we meet at optometrist. we will get ice creams on way out as long as everyone is cool and nobody tells dad. hollanders on three.

Asdfghjkl her perfectly straight face and even tone throughout should win an AWARD

batmanisagatewaydrug

a deeply underrated part of the gay taylor swift conspiracy theories is that if they're right and she really has spent over a decade sending subliminal messages based on minute details for people to decode then she's uuuuuh. I mean she's insane. she's jigsaw. she's the riddler. her dad bought her career because if she didn't have music to distract her she would have started building deathtraps.

sickbrokenangel

THIS IS THE FUNNIEST FUCKING RESPONSE IVE EVER GOTTEN ON ANY OF MY POSTS EVER

worldheritagepostorganization

World Heritage Post

cungadero

the shame of making a connection irl and them being like omg can i have your insta??? snapchat????? and having to be like sorry i live in a gap between two tree roots youre just going to have to normal text me like some kind of animal

kushblazer666

garbuge

my family wasn't this strict, but in some sects of buddhism you're not allowed to eat the "five pungent vegetables", onions garlic shallots leeks and umm chives i think, really any of those kind of vegetables. probably some monk ages ago was tired of onion farts stinking up the temple. anyways, one time my brother made a soup using all five of them. he said, "one sip of this, and you'll be reincarnated as a flea."