like jam, y'know? a compote if you will

Call me Ev(erett) | He/they | Crash out King

[mtt-everett]

Y'know what's the worst part about being trans and exploring your identity is? MY TUMBLR BLOG NAME ISNT A FUNNY JOKE ANYMORE 💔💔💔 because I changed my name 💔💔

Well okay not realllyyyyy because "Maro" was never my name, just like an online pen name thing.

But still.

mtt-everett, like the jam, y'know? a compote, if you will

Doesn't make any sense compared fo

Maromarlade, like the jam, y'know? a compote, if you will

[chrisevansshield]

STEVETONY'S THIS IS NOT A DRILL????

STONY IDENTITY PORN IN THE BIG 2025 WE ARE SO BACK DUDE HOLY SHIT 😭

[mtt-everett]

Ok I literally haven't been on here since like July but I need to put it somewhere

*takes deep breath*

IM GAY!!!! IM TRANS!!!! I WANNA BE A BOY!!! I AM A BOY!!!! IM A TRANS GUY!!!! IM A BOY KISSER!!!!! IM MLM!!!! IM OMNI AND GAY AND TRANS AND GENDERQUEER AND THEY ALL COEXIST!!!!!!!! MY NAME IS MATTHIAS!!!!!!!

okay thank you

[dajo42]

i was a kid asking questions like "when you say to rate my pain on a scale of 1 to 10 do you mean relative to what i have experienced before or what i could theoretically experience in the future because what if i say 8 and then later i get twenty billion papercuts and i realise relative to that this pain is a 1" and they would reply "just focus on what you know, you literally had your foot ran over by a ford focus" and id say "well exactly but it could have been both feet which i know would surely be worse" and it still took years to diagnose me as autistic

[snazzy-hats-and-adhd]

"Is a 1 to 10 pain scale intuitive?" needs to be evaluated as an autism diagnosis question.

[nealashitposts]

So I've got this friend whose nervous because she's trans and dating this guy who she hasn't told yet because they've only been on a two dates. For this story let's call the friend Jane and the guy she was dating Jason. Happy ending don't worry.

So I tell Jane to bring her boy over to a bbq I'm having and she can tell him she's trans at my place surrounded by queer and trans people who love her and will support her if he ends up being awful.

She waits till the end of the bbq to tell him the news, by which point the rest of us have learned that Jason is a kind, friendly, empathetic, hard working, dummy. So we sit down, all of us a little worried about this gym bro's reaction when she tells him she's trans, and that she understands if he doesn't want to keep dating her it's no big deal.

He's baffled, so we explain what trans is, and after the disclosure that she hasn't had bottom surgery yet...

"Oh you have a dick?"

"... yeah."

He look's around at the room full of people with baited breath, his clearly a little afraid girl friend says

"Oooohhhh! I get it! You think- don't worry Babe! Watch this!"

And ya'll this man jumps up, runs into the kitchen and returns with one of the bratwurst we had for grilling and proceeds to tilt his head back, put it down his throat, hold it in his mouth for a moment, and spit it up without even a whisper of a gag and then looks around at the group absolutely beaming with pride.

My mans saw his worried girlfriend and her support network and thought to him self "Oh they don't think I can't please my girl, but I'll show them!"

[nealashitposts]

I do feel the need to add that later he excitedly tell the group that as a straight guy, he never thought that skill would be useful outside hotdog eating contests.

[katya-1917]

I love this kind of wholesome and slightly dim stereotypical Straight Dude. The kind of guy who simply has no idea about bigotry and always assumes people a little cautious of him are worried about Something Else, they can't possibly be worried he'd be bigoted, since he'd never even consider not accepting someone.

[ganymedian]

Being demisexual and bi is funny to me. Anyone can hit it but you must suffer The Gauntlet first

[ganymedian]

You must answer me my riddles three

[ganymedian]

You must jingle your little jester hat in a tone that doth please me

[the-haiku-bot]

You must jingle your

little jester hat in a

tone that doth please me

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

[valrixian]

[Non-video format] They like each other but they’re afraid

-

More like Tim is afraid of their friendship changing and unsure if he wants to explore his sexual identity while Kon doesn’t want anything to make them drift apart, afraid of losing Tim

-

This took forever, omg, I didn’t know how I would want to do the line Art and you could sorta tell that I got lazy in the end

[irldenji]

Cowboy themed graphics requested by anon...experimented with this and I liked the result ^^

[cod-dump]

*a old video starts playing, camera focusing on a young Lieutenant Price*

Lieutenant Price: *ranting over a past mission he was pulled from, hair a mess with the start of a beard, eyes bloodshot from not sleeping for three days*

Lieutenant Price: -why pull us then? We were THERE- What is command hiding? Huh?? Why pull us??? Gunfire? Suspicious activity? Several heavily armed men spotted in the area!? THERE WAS CAUSE FOR INVESTIGATION-

*camera shifts before panning over to a young Nik*

Young!Nik: *staring at Lieutenant Price with concern, dark circles under his eyes as he disassociates*

Young!Laswell, from behind the camera: Is the dick worth it?

Young!Nik: *looks to the camera with a tired look before he nods solemnly, Lieutenant Price still ranting in the background*

Young!Laswell: *laughs*

[waveoftheocean]

happy superman day!! i don't have anything specifically for today but here's some kissing practice turned painting practice that i (predictably) got carried away with

[rusticfurnace]

// GHOSTSOAP x sailor song! (🔊 ON ) // suggestive imagery ⚠⚠⚠ individual panels:

[vyynn]

Peter: Mr Stark! The ice cream truck is gonna pass by soon, can I borrow 2 bucks?

Tony: What's the magic word kid.

Peter: Dad?

Tony, pulling out $100 from his wallet: It was supposed to be please but...that works too.

Bruce, muttering under his breath: A bit too well.

[browsethestacks]

Midnighter

Art by Chris Samnee

[mtt-everett]

Clark (retired emo kid), scrolling through Tumblr: !

Clark: Bruce, did you know there's fanfiction about us... as Clark and Bruce...?

Bruce: hn

Clark: Batman and Superman I expected, but us? Us??

Bruce: hn

Clark: And there's fics about Bruce Wayne and Batman... And Bruce Wayne, Batman and me!? Both mes!

Bruce (responsible for the popularity of blond!Batman): hn (no)

Clark: enemies to lovers... romantic rivals to lovers!?

Clark: Bruce, we're poly with ourselves

Bruce: hn (interesting)

Clark, squinting at screen: what's a "miraculous square"??

Bruce (responsible for Superman!Bruce and Batman!Clark): no clue, dearest

Spin-off post based on this post :))

[mtt-everett]

It is widely known in fandom spaces that Gotham is heavily split between the SuperBat shippers and the BruceMan shipper

It's an all out ship-war, the two sides vehemently hate and bash each other online

One day someone proposes the obvious: a poly ship

SuperBruceMan becomes one of the biggest ships in the Gotham real-people shipping community

And then Bruce Wayne ruins everything, by publicly dating nobody-reporter Clark Kent

This spawns a third faction (the Brent shippers), and the magic of poly ships are forgotten

Until someone (yet again) proposes polyamory, and SuperBrentMan is born

Identity shenanigans quickly becomes a SuperBrentMan staple, as the ship is made up of two civilians and two unknown vigilantes/superheroes

And thus, the first SuperBrentMan miraculous square fic is born

The utterly charming but ditzy Bruce Wayne must find a way to tell the love of his life, Clark Kent, of his secret identity as an alien superhero, while Clark Kent tries to come clean about being Gotham's dark knight

The real Clark and Bruce are just thankful that the shippers got the identities switched

now with a part 2 :)!

[armandgender]

writing is so fun

[armandgender]

writing is impossible why does anyone do this

[ironspidersblog]