I wish to make a bone broth of human bonesâŚ
almost home
I'd rather be in outer space đ¸
đŞź
Misplaced Lens Cap

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Cosimo Galluzzi

Product Placement

⣠Chile in a Photography âŁ
will byers stan first human second
Claire Keane
occasionally subtle

izzy's playlists!

tannertan36

Origami Around
styofa doing anything
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
Mike Driver
Cosmic Funnies
One Nice Bug Per Day
TVSTRANGERTHINGS
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@multi-element-foxi
I wish to make a bone broth of human bonesâŚ
âummmmm ur bra strap is showing :/ â
i thought this was me at first and i was really confused
omg hi
WEâRE MULTIPLYING
uhhhhhhh
hey
I FINALLY FOUND IT
Found what?
This Legendary post
This post is a gem and you have to reblog it or else you lose it
Someone confirm that these are all different people.
itâs here itâs on my dash!!
seeing ancient tumblr posts in the flesh rather than in screenshots has the same energy as seeing an infamous relic in a museum for the first time
World Heritage Post
Tumblr Code.
If I ever see any of you in public, the code is âI like your shoelacesâ
that way we know weâre from tumblr without revealing anything
Iâm just going to say this to strangers until i find a tumblr person
must keep reblogering!! Im going to be so suspicious if any one tells me this now!
Remember the answer is: I stole them from the president.
always reblog tumblr identification
World Heritage Post
Yeah yeah, normal Alucard is great and would love me at my worst.
But Abridged Alucard would love me at my most autistic moments and say, âDamn, ya ass is fat.â
reminder to:
straighten your back
go pee goddAMN IT STOP HOLDING IT
go take your meds if you need to
drink some water
go get a snack if you havent eaten in a while
maybe wander around the house/stretch a little if youâve been sat at the computer a while (artists especially: sTRETCH THOSE WRISTS)
reply to that text/message from earlier youâd forgotten about
maybe send a nice lil message to someone having a bad day?
I just would like to thank everyone who ever reblogs this so that it somehow ends up back on my dash because I usually need the reminder (especially the drinking water one)
Of all posts to see with a million notes, Iâm glad itâs this one.
Did a bunch of dogs breakup a fight between two cats? Am I seeing this right??
Having none of that shit today.
âAy man, yâall chill the fuck out. Yâall fucking up the party.â
I CANâT BELIEVE WHAT IâM SEEING
Pack animals like dogs donât tolerate dissent in their group because it weakens the packâs social structure⌠There are similar clips on youtube of them breaking up rabbit and rooster fights⌠They donât care what species you are, they just want you to CUT THAT SHIT OUT.
They donât differentiate species because dogs think everything else is just a weird dog.Â
A WEIRD DOG
Iâve actually watched dogs break up fistfights between humans by physically dragging the combatants apart dogs donât take no shit from anyone
Full Piece
Currently passing away
GET YOURSELF A MAN WHO CAN BE YOUR PERSONAL ASMRTIST. LIKE-eifrwgkutdhfc
Yâever read something and have understanding that has eluded you interminably suddenly stop, curl up, and snuggle neatly into a fold in your brain because a new way way opened to it?
I've seen this passed around a few times, and I have one thing to say:
It's online. The book was carefully and wonderfully recreated online by hand. You can find it here. The entire book is this easy.
calculusmadeeasy.org
#important #reposttosavealife #WHEREHAVEYOUBEEN
*old hillbilly with long beard voice* they bout done tore my pussy UP
Crows are scary They
use tools
Can be taught to speak (like parrots)
Have huge brains for birds
like seriously their brain-to-body size ratio is equal to that of a chimpanzee
They vocalize anger, sadness, or happiness in response to things
they are scary smart at solving puzzles
some crows stay with their mates until one of them dies
they can remember faces
SIDENOTE HERE BECAUSE HOLY SHIT. They did an experiment where these guys wore masks and some of them fucked with crows. Pretty soon the crows recognized the masks = douchebag. But the nice guys with masks they left alone. THEN, OH WEâRE NOT DONE, NO SIR crows that WERENâT EVEN IN THE EXPERIMENT AND NEVER SAW THE MASK BEFORE knew about mask-dudes and attacked them on sight. THEY PASSED ON THE FUCKING INFORMATION TO THEIR CROW BUDDIES.
They remember places where crows were killed by farmers and change their migration patterns.
Guys Iâm really scared of crows now. (q)Â
Yeah but have you seen thisÂ
A colleague of my dadâs lives next to a lake, and looked out the window one morning to see a duck trapped in the ice. A crow swooped down. âOh hell,â she thought, expecting carnage, because crows are opportunists. But the crow chipped at the ice with its beak until the duck was free.
Idk of this counts but a few crows saved me from a magpie swooping attack once ,theyâre bros who can tell when magpies are being unreasonable and need to chill
I love crows so damn much. When I was fifteen, I hit a pretty serious bout of depression, to the point I was in my room for months. Well, a family of crows made a nest in a tree outside my window. There were two parents and two chicks. One chick was healthy and strong. One was weak, and had a caw like something being strained. It sounded more like a rooster crowing and so my parents jokingly named him âBuckâ.Well⌠months passed and Buckâs sibling was taught to fly. His parents focused on the sibling because the sibling was strong. The father stayed behind to try and teach Buck, but I saw him try to fly, fail, and crash to the floor. His father helped him back up into the tree.
Every day, I would watch Buck from my window until one day I opened it and started talking to him. He was small and gangly and he couldnât caw right. His feathers were all over the place and I felt a kinship. So I made a deal with him. I told him that if he could do it, if he could fly, then I could find the strength to get up. Well⌠near the end of the season, after talking with him every day, I finally saw him get out of the nest. He went to the edge of his branch, braced himself, and jumped⌠and just before he hit the ground, he soared back up into the sky. I cheered harder than I ever had before.
That winter, Buck left the area. I was crestfallen. I felt like Iâd lost a friend. But I was so damn proud of him.Â
Cut to the next spring? Iâm walking up the driveway one day when suddenly I hear a sound⌠a broken caw. I look up, and Buck is sitting in a tree above my head. He stared at me and puffed his feathers, then hopped down in front of me and cawed again. I was so damn thrilled, and I told him how proud I was of him. He ruffled his feathers and then soared off into his old tree.Â
That summer? I heard two broken caws. One from Buck⌠and one from his chick.
Cut to ten years later? We have a family of crows who all have a very distinct caw and they come here and spend every spring, summer, and fall on our property. Buck still greets me every spring.
that last reply made me wanna cry. thatâs so beautiful.
Donât forget the Russian Crow SLEDDING DOWN A ROOF not once, but twice.Â
this one morning i kept hearing really loud caws, i remember it was like 5am, LIKE REALLY LOUD AND ANNOYING AND AGGRESSIVE, so loud that i could hear it through a closed window, and i eventually went outside to check it out. there was a crow on my front lawn, it had an injury on its head and couldnât fly and there were two other crows circling right above it, and they were cawing like mad.Â
i tried to get close and take a better look and one of them dived super low and tried to attack me. so i went back in the house and chopped some sliced raw meat and tossed it at him from a distance.
a few more times later, very soon after, they could tell i was trying to help, and did not attack me. i was âallowedâ to walk up close and pick him up, he couldnât drink water properly so i had to dip my finger in a bowl and stick it in his mouth.
i did this few times a day and it went on for about a week before he disappeared, i thought he recovered and left, but he came back the next day and lands on me, and i see him around the block quite often, and he would come sit on my shoulder for a few minutes and then fly away again. i feel like iâve adopted a son.
Best birbs !!
your son is Beautiful and Strong
every time I see this post it has different crow stories and every time I reblog it again because all crow stories are good stories
Like, I wouldnât want to be on bad terms with a crow, but they are a really smart animal, they arenât scary You just want to be nice to them because they will know and they will remember, and they will pay you back if you treat them a certain way.
As a side note, I volunteered at a rehab (Hope for Wildlife), where they were rehabbing a crow with a broken wingâwho was named Russell Crow. He kept pulling his bandage off so a sleeve was cut off some old clothing and put on him like a little sweater.Â
!!!!
I donât think Iâll ever not reblog this. This posts makes me cry and smile at the same time.
Heâs so handsome!!
I would trust a crow with my life
This is your regularly scheduled crow appreciation post
many east indians respect crows and lowkey worship them and now i know why :)
fucking superb you funky little death omens
Damn now I want a crow
@hellsite-hall-of-fame
The fact that my namesake is after a crow- am I evil????
apparently if you dont take your meds you feel worse. who knew
its like you didnt put gas in your car and youre like âwhy wont my car goâ and the car is like âi want to kill myselfâ
The kicker is sometimes you feel worse when you take your meds ^^
I was being cancelled because apparently it was classist to put feathers on dinosaurs.
Both dream me and irl me were very confused.
it might have been a dream, but feathered dinosaurs being linked to an ideology isn't that uncommon. Them being viewed as "leftist", "woke" or "gay" has occured several times.
I collect these examples.
reblog if you like dinosaurs, are gay, or just really like feathers
Out of spite we started last year the "Jurassic Left" streams, doing all sorts of nasty woke stuff with extinct critters ;)
Spite can be beautiful when you know how to channel it.
Yes, I am gay. Feathers be pret. I call my bbb my dino.
when I brush my teeth my tits be jiggling I'm not afraid to say it
Honestly, yeah.
Itâs funny how science fiction universes so often treat humans as a boring, default everyman species or even the weakest and dumbest.
I want to see a sci fi universe where weâre actually considered one of the more hideous and terrifying species.
How do we know our saliva and skin oils wouldnât be ultra-corrosive to most other sapient races? What if we actually have the strongest vocal chords and can paralyze or kill the inhabitants of other worlds just by screaming at them? What if most sentient life in the universe turns out to be vegetable-like and lives in fear of us rare âanimalâ races who can move so quickly and chew shit up with our teeth?
Like that old story âtheyâre made of meat,â only weâre scarier.
HOLY SHIT THEY EAT CAPSAICIN FOR FUN
YOU GUYS I HEARD A HUMAN ONCE ATE AN AIRPLANE.
A HUMAN CAN KEEP FIGHTING FOR HOURS EVEN AFTER YOU SHOOT IT
humans are a proud warrior race with a pantheon of bloody gods: Ram-Bo, Schwarzenegger, etc.
REMOVING A LIMB WILL NOT FATALLY INCAPACITATE HUMANS: ALWAYS DESTROY THE HEAD.
WARNING: HUMANS CAN DETECT YOU EVEN AT NIGHT BY TRACKING VIBRATIONS THROUGH THE ATMOSPHERE
WARNING: HUMANS CAN REPRODUCE AT A RATE OF 1 PER SPACEYEAR. DESTROY INFESTATIONS IMMEDIATELY
THE HUMAN MOUTH HAS OVER THIRTY OUTCROPS OF BONE AND POWERFUL JAW MUSCLES.
HUMAN BITES CAN BE FATALLY INFECTIOUS EVEN TO OTHER HUMANS
WARNING: HUMANS CAN AND WILL USE IMPROVISED WEAPONS. SEE CLASSIFIED DATA LABELED J. CHAN.
HUMANS CAN PROJECT BIOWEAPONS FROM ALMOST EVERY ORIFICE ON THEIR BODY. DO NOT INHALE
OH GOD THE HUMANS FIGURED OUT DOOR HANDLES OH GOD OH GOD
More seriously, humans do have a number of advantages even among Terrestrial life. Our endurance, shock resistance, and ability to recover from injury is absurdly high compared to almost any other animal. We often use the phrase âhealthy as a horseâ to connote heartiness - but compared to a human, a horse is as fragile as spun glass. Thereâs mounting evidence that our primitive ancestors would hunt large prey simply by following it at a walking pace, without sleep or rest, until it died of exhaustion; itâs called pursuit predation. Basically, weâre the Terminator.
(The only other animal that can sort of keep up with us? Dogs. Thatâs why we use them for hunting. And even then, itâs only âsort ofâ.)
Now extrapolate that to a galaxy in which most sapient life did not evolve from hyper-specialised pursuit predators:
Our strength and speed is nothing to write home about, but we donât need to overpower or outrun you. We just need to outlast you - and by any other speciesâ standards, we just plain donât get tired.
Where a simple broken leg will cause most species to go into shock and die, we can recover from virtually any injury thatâs not immediately fatal. Even traumatic dismemberment isnât necessarily a career-ending injury for a human.
We heal from injuries with extreme rapidity, recovering in weeks from wounds that would take others months or years to heal. The results arenât pretty - humans have hyperactive scar tissue, among our other survival-oriented traits - but theyâre highly functional.
Speaking of scarring, look at our medical science. We developed surgery centuries before developing even the most rudimentary anesthetics or life support. In extermis, humans have been known to perform surgery on themselves - and survive. Thanks to our extreme heartiness, we regard as routine medical procedures what most other species would regard as inventive forms of murder. We even perform radical surgery on ourselves for purely cosmetic reasons.
In essence, weâd be Space Orcs.
Our jaws have too many TEETH in them, so we developed a way to WELD METAL TO OUR TEETH and FORCE THE BONES IN OUR JAW to restructure over the course of years to fit them back into shape, and then we continue to wear metal in out mouths to keep them in place.Â
We formed cohabitative relationships with tiny mammals and insects we keep at bay from bothering us by death, often using little analouge traps.Â
And by god, we will eat anything.Â
We use borderline toxic peppers to season our food.Â
We expose ourselves to potentially lethal solar radiation in the pursuit of darkening our skin.Â
We risk hearing loss for the opportunity to see our favorite musicians live.Â
We have a game where two people get into an enclosed area and hit each other until time runs out/one of them pass out
We willingly jump out of planes with only a flimsy piece of cloth to prevent us from splattering against the ground.Â
Our response to natural disasters is to just rebuild our buildings in the exact same places.Â
We climb mountains and risk freezing to death for bragging rights
We invented dogs. We took our one time predators and completely domesticated them.Â
On a planet full of lions, tigers and bears, we managed to advance further and faster than any other species on the planet.Â
Klingons and Krogan and Orcs ainât got shit on us
We drink ethanol (in concentrations high enough to be used as an effective as microbicide or a solvent!) for the express purpose of achieving blood toxicity and disrupting normal brain function⌠AS A RECREATIONAL ACTIVITY!
On the same subject, we also deliberately incinerate assorted substances and then inhale the particulate-heavy smoke and vapor resulting for the same effect. EVEN IN THE FACE OF SAID SUBSTANCES BEING CARCINOGENIC, BECAUSE WE JUST DONâT GIVE A FUCK.
Humans do not have biological castes. Kill their commander and another will take its place. Soldiers left alone on a planet will start farming and manufacturing to survive. Farmers and manufacturers will take up arms and kill you if pressed. Just because two humans look different doesnât mean they cannot do each otherâs jobs.
Breeding does not kill them. A single human can mate dozens or hundreds of times in a lifetime. They often do so as recreation. Xenobiology team six believes they do not have a mating season but this is too strange to be true.
Their appendages are not designed for hitting, so they developed special training to make them very good at hitting anyhow.Â
The proteins making up their bodies are toxic and cause prion disease. Do not touch anything humans have touched. Do not consume earth foods. Fire does not adequately remove this contamination.
Humans perceive sixteen times the colors we do. Do not hide in bushes or vines from humans. They can distinguish your pelt from the foliage with ease.
We tried venting waste gas into the tunnels to kill the humans when they attacked. Turns out they breathe it.Â
Everything on their planet came from a single biological strain. They developed comprehensive genetics BEFORE they developed space travel.Â
They lack radio receptors and cannot be brought into compliance with right-thought simply by broadcasting to them. Even after we learned how to translate it into sound-waves one of their hatchlings drove the Great Authority mad by responding to every demand with a single question: âWhy?â
#an individual human being is actually a microbiome in its own rightâyou are dealing with a legion each time you approach them     #they carry pathological agents inside their deep tissues and this is advantageous to their health     #one of the most widespread and resilient viruses on their planet is treated as mildly hazardousâeven though it causes     #massive disruption to the bodyâs homeostasis     #(their young offspring endure multiple rhinovirus infections EACH YEAR yet they seem unperturbed by this)     #they have developed such long lifespans that now their primary threat is their own bodyâs degeneration     #humanity has literally figured out how to survive so long that their body gives out under them     #and they are not satisfied with that     #stupid willful vengeful survivalists who treat mortality like a challenge  Â
I am speechless
We are the real terror to the aliens. Thatâs why they donât come around
HERITAGE POST
this is the OG humans are scary space monsters post!
@hellsite-hall-of-fame tell me youâve got itttt