rip @mundusinretrograde - Tumblr Blog

i love how much the internet has latched onto the goose from the goose game. like it’s just a goose and it’s a goose that you control, so it has no set personality, but the entire internet looked at this

and said “ah. a bastard” and adopted it.

silentassassin21

bookrebelwordwarrior

Where can I watch Rafiki IN PEACE???? I’VE BEEN LOOKING FOR IT SINCE IT CAME OUT!

weareallstilllearningright

Pls share if you find it!

sanctimoniousscrawlings

I would like to add The Children’s Hour (1961) with Audrey Hepburn and Shirley MacLaine.

V sad ending but really compelling story. Audrey Hepburn is, as always, adorable. There is a small child in the movie I’d like to punt into the sun. Anything else would be spoilers.

uesp

“My mama and papa left me all alone, and I’m so very hungry.”

–A Little Girl

morrowinds

Oh No! Here, Let Me Take You To The Candy Shop To Buy Some Candy :)

sci-the-superb

Oh! I Know A Shortcut Through This Dark Alley

astralbite

Oh yes, very good, very good.. My, what a lovely smile you have, and your teeth.. YOUR TEETH!

AGGGH!

uesp

“People are so trusting.”

–Babette, Vampire Assassin

gaphic

‘pop’ is pretty heinous but like, I’ll accept it, yknow? it’s just the other half of ‘soda-pop,’ like how ‘cab’ and ‘taxi’ are the two halves of ‘taxicab.’ it’s fine. it’s chill.

but coke? that’s a fucking brand name! of a specific drink with a specific flavor! that shits RUDE, it’s CONFUSING, it’s DOWNRIGHT NONSENSICAL! fuckin misusing the art of language to confound your fellow man! the gall! learn some fucking respect

saturniidae-served-cold

No it just happens sometimes. Its like jell-o, kleenex, popsicle, scotch tape. It just happens.

mothric

But that’s not a good parallel at all. You can’t compare calling Sprite “coke” like a lawless heathen to the classic linguistic phenomenon of generic trademarks / proprietary eponyms, and I’ll tell you why:

‘Jell-o’ is a brand name under which multiple flavours of gelatin (and pudding/custard) are produced. There isn’t just “Jell-o” and then special “strawberry Jell-o”; the name has never denoted just one specific flavour.

‘Popsicle’ is the same as Jello, it was never a name for just one flavour of popsicle.

‘Kleenex’ is a specific brand of tissues, but it’s not inherently that distinct from other tissues. They are all lightweight tissues used to blow your nose.

‘Scotch tape’ is used to refer to any tape that is like the original scotch tape, i.e., clear, thin, small, sticky on one side. We don’t call all tape ‘scotch tape’. Electric tape, duct tape, and packing tape are all their own things, and anybody who calls any of them ‘scotch tape’ has no regard for their fellow man and ought to be thrown into the sea.

MEANWHILE, Coca-Cola is a specific kind of soda with its own distinct flavour. When Coca-Cola makes other flavours, they’re called “vanilla Coke,” “cherry Coke,” etc. but “Coke” is still its own standalone flavour, a wholly other Thing apart from the “special” flavours the company produces.

It would make far more sense if people used ‘coke’ the way we use ‘scotch tape’; that is, to denote only those sodas that are similar in appearance and taste to Coca-Cola (Pepsi, RC, Shasta Cola, etc.). I could see all of those being lumped in under a generic term ‘coke’. I could even see it being extended to all brown sodas, even though comparing Root Beer to Coke is like comparing a badger to a zebra just because they’re both black-and-white mammals. You’re on thin fucking ice but at least there’s still some semblance of logic.

But no. You southerners, who bask in your sun and heat and chew upon your wheat stems with the indifference of an armadillo in the face of oncoming traffic, you who revel in lawlessness and chaos, you linguistic delinquents who fear neither God nor man,

you are really going to look at a list of drinks that includes such variety in taste and apperance as Sprite, Mountain Dew, Mountain Dew Code Red, Orange Fanta, and Dr. Pepper, and call it all “Coke.”

You’re going to picture, in your mind, a clear, lemon-lime fizzy drink and request “coke.” And then when asked “what kind?” you will not say “Coke Zero,” “Diet Coke,” or “Cherry Coke,” no. You will answer “Sprite,” like an animal, like a feral possum who knows the ways of right and wrong and chooses wrong just to spite its creator.

And then you have the gall to say it’s an eponym as valid as ‘Jello’. No. You tossed your logic into the dumpster fires of the underworld long ago, you cannot justify it now. You cannot tell me you don’t know your own crimes. “It’s all coke,” you say, and you taste the sin of it on your tongue, and you laugh. Know this, that you are inviting judgment upon yourself and one day you will be devoured by the sun.

unseenphil

Sometimes, when I lived in Alabama, I’d get asked what kind of Coke I wanted when going to a restaurant. I usually answered sweet tea. This never confused anyone having the actual conversation but visiting northerners, well…see above.

You could see that whole rant, hiding behind their eyes and the curl of their lip.

larme-girl

afeelgoodblog

afunhousemirror-deactivated2020

incorrectedda

Thor, reading a fortune cookie: if you kill a killer, the number of killers in the world stays the same

Loki, with a mouth full of takeout: kill two

missmamibee

saw a kitty squishing some flowers in the yard and she looked at me like she had arcane secrets

missmamibee

artistic rendition

tedallen

Quick! Youre on chopped, the basket ingredients are

Proscuitto, pirate berry cereal, smoked white cheddar, and nyquil. What do you make?

neckteeth

people seem to all be responding to this post with the same train of thought: prosciutto and cheese sticks, fried in cereal breading, nyquil sauce on the side. but do you know what counts against you in chopped? lack of creativity. congratulations, every single one of you with the same hivemind answer just got voted out. not to mention the concept of a nyquil sauce on cheese sticks (smoked cheese especially) is fucking appalling. and if you can’t taste the nyquil, that’s also grounds to get voted out.

take it from a fucking crocker, there isn’t anything that can’t be made into a good meal. especially this? at it’s base, all of these are strong, hearty flavors. not necessarily ones i’d opt to pair and i try not to make a habit out of cooking with menthol, but that doesn’t mean it can’t be made to work.

i’m gonna hit this with a double feature, because i want this meal to happen. trying to force all possible basket ingredients into the smallest conceivable physical space, as is the case with the cheese stick ideal, may get the job done but like i said, it’s gonna taste like shit. breaking it into separate parts will cut you a little closer on time, but the dish itself will be better and your presentation will take a heavy bonus.

so here’s what you do.

take a two tablespoons of nyquil and put it in a small saucepan with two parts water to one part nyquil and pinch of salt. tiny, my man. a quarter teaspoon, maybe. let it steep over a low broil for 5 or so minutes* or until the water starts to take on a greenish tint. don’t stir it. separate the thicker part of the syrup from the ugly menthol-tinted water like you’d take out an egg white. dump the syrupy bit, but keep what is now a nyquil extract in the saucepan.

take that off the burner and let it cool to room temperature and put it into a small bowl; mix it in with a dash of real mint, three teaspoons of lemon juice, a tablespoon of white wine vinegar, two teaspoons of honey, another teaspoon of salt and a half cup of olive oil. this little vinaigrette will serve the purpose of a standard mint, save for that glaringly artificial taste that there’s no fucking way you’re going to be able to avoid cooking with nyquil anyways. it’s the difference between real oranges and orange gummies, but since the hors d’ouvre we’re making is primarily sweet anyways, it won’t hurt anyone to slide into the candy-like flavor realm.

*while your extract is steeping, make the most of your wait time and peel and cut a few slim wedges of ripe sweet melon. personally, i prefer charentais, but the best the chopped pantry will probably have is gonna be canteloupe. (honeydew works too, but it harshes the color scheme.) half your wedges once you get them out into a nice finger-food size. you should still have time to strip your prosciutto into inch/inch and a half wide strips, but if you don’t, you can take that on while the saucepan is cooling.

once your vinaigrette is done and mixed, toss your melon wedges in it until they’ve got a nice, sweet sheen over ‘em, and then wrap the seasoned wedges in the prosciutto. this is an italian classic, and it’s super easy. like i said before, the artificial taste of the nyquil will give this a slight twinge of tasting more like a snack, but overall, it’s still a great appetizer. if you do it right, this is high marks city.

“oh, fucker, but you didn’t even touch the berry cereal or the cheese!”

you are absolutely fucking right. because you know how bad it would’ve tasted if i did? i’m giving you the benefit of the doubt and assuming you don’t. so here’s the long-awaited fabled part two.

from the pantry, you’re gonna need some good apples. they don’t specify which wood the cheese was smoked with, but i’m going to assume it was hickory as that tends to be the favorite for cheddar flavors? so you can compliment the hickory smoke with a tart apple that’s got a sweetness to it - honeycrisp or braeburn are gonna be on the money.

put a whole apple (not peeled or cored, but make sure to take the stem off), a cup of apple cider vinegar, a cup of water, a cup of sugar, a tablespoon of salt, two teaspoons of cinnamon, and a tablespoon of lemon juice into the food processor and light that shit up. put your mushy applesauce-style mix into a large, wide pan into it until it caramelizes and evens out. it’s butter now.

now take two cups of berry cereal and take the actual berries out. with a mortar and pestle, grind up those weird yellow square bits into cereal dust. cut 6-8 slices from a thin loaf of french bread, brush the crusts in olive oil, and roll vertically in the cereal dust. once the outside of the bread has a second crust of cereal around the outside, arrange all of the pieces on a non-stick cooking pan. (you won’t use all of them in your plating, but it never hurts to have a little extra in case they burn on the edges or something gets fucky.)

take the apple butter you made and spread it thinly but evenly over the bread slices. cover them with a layer of folded prosciutto, a layer of thin apple slices, and a layer of sliced smoked cheese. bake for 15-20 minutes, or until the bread (and cereal) is golden brown.

plate on a flat square dish with one baked cheddar and apple butter tea sandwich fixed to one corner, your prosciutto-wrapped melon wedge in the opposite corner with the core-curve facing the center of the plate. accent the sandwich side with two apple slices forming an angle, and divide the plate with a colorful drizzle of the nyquil vinaigrette and a mint leaf.

last, but most certainly not least. while you’re on chopped, in that cute little cutscene after your plates have been served and you’re monologuing your final thoughts before the judges try your food,

look directly into the camera and invite tumblr user @tedallen to suck your dick.

tedallen

Jesus christ, you win all of chopped. Are you happy? Are you happy the network canceled chopped because of you? Unbelievable. Well, take your pants off, let’s go.

rave-lord-nito

Visit Original Link

witchofapollo

Me: Just because you can’t feel the old gods, don’t assume they’re dead. They’ve been asleep but when they wake, you’ll feel like a fool

My co-worker who sits next to me at my new office job, after literally just asking how I am: What the actual fuck

thehedgewytch-blog

Nightmare Jar Recipe

Here is a fantastic nightmare jar that has been of tremendous use for me and my friends and family. I will say this - it only lasts about a year before you will need to make a new one.

Ingredients

1 small jar you can seal

~8 in. Black Yarn

3-10 strands of hair from the person you are trying to protect

8-20 sharp objects like rusty nails, broken glass, etc.

Salt

Lavender

Mint

Rose Petals (optional)

Bay Leaves

Candle

Sharpie

Directions

Start by placing the hair into the vessel. This tricks whatever is causing the nightmares into the jar. Then put in the sharp objects to poke and prod the negativity and trap it in the jar once and for all.

Next, put in your herbs. Mint and lavender are meant to bring restful and calm sleep, and the bay leaves are meant for cleansing and keeping evil at bay. The rose petals will bring dreams of love.

SIDE NOTE: In my experience, the rose petals brought a lot of insanely sexual dreams. So take that and do what you want with it.

Now add about half of your salt. The black yarn absorbs the negative energies. Wrap it up in a little ball and drop it into the jar, visualizing the negativity being sucked into a black hole. Pour the remaining salt into the jar and seal it with wax from your candle.

Feel free to write inscribe protective runes or sigils into the jar with the sharpie if you so choose.

Charge the nightmare jar in the light of the moon, and keep near the bed. A window sill is best as it will need to be recharged from time to time.

Hope this helps everyone - if you have any questions or comments, let me know!

specter-rot

First, a note: I ask that people please reblog this to spread this since the tags are kinda unusable right now, especially when a post has external links within it.

Dreamwidth has been my main active posting platform for a year and a half now, and I’ve noticed a lot of bloggers talking about jumping ship over to DW with tumblr’s uhhhhhh current state of affairs.

But DW is kinda bland and boring if you’re too young to have been of the LiveJournal generation, and therefore don’t know where to look or start in order to build your friends list and find communities, so I’m going to do some of the legwork for you.

the_great_tumblr_purge: I made a dw community specifically for people jumping ship from tumblr to reconnect with each other.

addme: a friending community where you pimp yourself out and find other people with similar interests that you might want to see on your reading page.

addme_fandom: similar to above, only with a stronger emphasis on finding people based on your fandoms.

fandomcalendar: a community where you can find fandom events, such as big bangs, exchanges, challenges, bingos, etc. and other fandom communities that might suit your interests.

questionoftheday: for when you don’t know what to post.

If anybody else has communities they want to add, go right ahead and add them in a reblog.

Please reblog this.