kick ass! play bass! death to the human race!!

it's ok it'll grow back 🐌 if u see me posting no u dont i use a queue

[badassdemonsword]

The only explanation for Tom Cruise is that hes from the Sims 3

[captainsblogsupplemental]

[squilko]

a smilo ! !

[irondive]

[bgm05]

I'm the ladder that stepped up

[karvina]

i just found a 9,000,000 leaf clover

[xylophonetangerine]

[melonflavored]

Umm...

[melonflavored]

For the record i don't disagree

[jame7t]

just felt you with my feelers. Not interested. DO NOT LAY EGGS IN OR NEAR ME.

[thywanderingknight]

*polishes my sword*

[jame7t]

DO NOT JERK OFF NEAR MY NEST.

[peachnix]

new product for angels who want to lose their wings

[sabertoothwalrus]

fixed it

[nyaa]

卵

[nyaa]

[10-4ward]

Wickedpedia

[baejax-the-great]

So difficult to withhold the eyeroll when people say things like, "My body was designed for this" wrt childbirth or whatever, because even if I accept the premise that our bodies were designed, I have to imagine mine was designed with the most basic function of breathing in mind, and yet I had childhood asthma and would have died without intervention so idk if I'm trusting my "designer" with something as physically traumatic and historically deadly as childbirth

[baejax-the-great]

"Your body knows what to do" my body tries to close its own throat and die if I encounter a shrimp or perhaps a crab so idk about that one man

[scifiseries]

[edgar-allan-possum]

[djbodyhorror]

your mom jokes don't work when you know someone too well. I would never be in bed with such a wicked woman. That's not even what I had your mom saying last night. I wouldn't speak to her.

[innerchildabortionclinic]

Girl okay

[innerchildabortionclinic]

The parodies are arriving

[cartyrs]

genuinely the best commission gimmick ive ever thought of

[izzetheking]

i just said a prayer to god before eating my

doritos

i want to thank him for corn and creating corn to nourish and strengthen my big fat boddy