Musings of my Midnight Mind

I'm just trying to quiet the blur in my crazy mind any way that I can. Mostly by writing. I own all of the intellectual property on this blog, unless otherwise specified.

[musingsofmymidnightmind]

You were composed of mediocrity and dressed in unrealized fantasies - disappointment disguised in potential.

I should have known.

[musingsofmymidnightmind]

I was spoiled this summer.

I was spoiled to discover what it felt like to fall asleep with your body pressed to mine and wake up warm with your body heat.

I know now, what it's like to see your tousled hair in the pale morning light and feel you reach for me with still closed eyes.

I know now, how wonderful it is to reach out to you and have you actually be there.

And now, I'm very aware of the empty room that greets me in the morning.

I'm very aware of the cold left side of my bed.

And I miss you.

waking up without you.

[musingsofmymidnightmind]

💜

[musingsofmymidnightmind]

I've been posting everything on instagram lately. Follow me for more poetry!💕

@hannahmariewrites

[musingsofmymidnightmind]

You cannot growl my name through bared teeth and make it sound like, "I love you."

@hannahmariewrites on instagram

[musingsofmymidnightmind]

You'd think me lonely With only shadows to hold me You think me blue without you But the shadows are more tender And the ghosts, they love me better Than anything I ever had with you

(@hannahmariewrites on instagram)

[musingsofmymidnightmind]

I don't know if I love you, but I want the chance to find out. I don't know if we'll work, but I sure would love to try.

[musingsofmymidnightmind]

Get drunk on my wine soaked lips and laugh with me under the stars.

💙

[musingsofmymidnightmind]

When you kissed me I felt something ignite My heart raced and my head spun A spark touched my kindling bones Oxygen touch feeding the flame And the fire engulfed me entirely

[musingsofmymidnightmind]

I wonder if you have any idea how many poems I’ve written about you.

[musingsofmymidnightmind]

Wanderlust

There is an aching in my bones

For adventure

For the stars

To chase the sunlight

To run through rivers

To feel the waves crash against me

There is an aching in my bones

A longing

A genuine need

To twirl in fields of flowers

To crunch the autumn leaves

To wander through the fog

There is an aching in my bones

That will not be hushed

Cannot be ignored

I had so hoped you would go with me

Feel the wind on your cheeks

The rain encompass your entirety

But if you so refuse

I must leave you behind

For in these great adventures

It is myself that I find

[musingsofmymidnightmind]

I wish I could really be that girl you wrote songs about. The one you dreamed of and wished for and wanted. I wish I could be that mystery for you. But the truth is if you asked me, I would give you everything I have and everything I am and apologize for not having more to give.

[musingsofmymidnightmind]

Your old guitar still smells like you The case holds more than an instrument I can't open it without thinking of long nights and serenades I stopped playing it When you stopped calling The music left with you and I can't get the melody right alone

[musingsofmymidnightmind]

The last time I saw you was the last time I had a cigarette. I don't know which withdrawal is worse. I just know that I'm jonesing.

[musingsofmymidnightmind]

I did my time I learned my lesson I drank my wine Stumbled to bed and There you were Waiting for me

[musingsofmymidnightmind]

Perhaps One Day

When I think of the dynamic we had It's difficult to believe I lived that way I don't think I'd believe it at all But I have the scars to prove it The pink lines on my thighs My hips My breasts Are still very clear They've faded some Since you laid your hands on me Perhaps one day I won't see them at all Perhaps one day All I'll have left as proof Are the memories And the nightmares And I can pretend It didn't happen at all Yes Perhaps one day I will be happy.

[musingsofmymidnightmind]

You are a breath of crisp air after too long under water.