@mycapofmisfortune - Tumblr Blog

Oh god, why didn’t you just let him through?

This Untitled Goose Game expansion is WILD

one time I went over to a friend's house and their housemate was making paper in the living room, and we saw this big tub full of water they were using to dissolve old scrap paper into a slurry, and everyone was immediately like "oh, you need scrap paper?" and started turning out their jacket pockets and producing expired coupons and bus tickets and crumpled receipts and old shopping lists and whatever else they'd been carrying round with them for no good reason, and passing it all to the paper-making housemate to make sure it was suitable before it got torn up and dropped into the tub, while people took turns stirring the slurry with a big wooden stick. it was strangely ritualistic, like presenting an offering to some kind of temple elder for inspection before placing it in a watery shrine to be devoured and reformed. pulp for the pulp god.

paverics

“my father is a boy and my mother is a girl so i’m mixed” is the funniest possible response to someone asking your gender and it came from 6’5 Viking footballer and notable weird little guy Erling Haaland on a Snapchat

paverics

comedians can only dream of writing something this funny

#oh i love him #he's so effortlessly funny #it's very endearing #erling haaland

hi i read your bloodymary fanfiction and i loved it. I’ve never seen a soulmate AU with those rules and it works perfectly for them.

Thank you!! Even though I really love Soulmate AUs, I've never really written them before but I felt like Bloodymary fits it so well. Your mark being the thing your soulmate said in their lowest point really came out of nowhere, but they've both gone through so much heartbreak, I don't think I could have come up with a better mark for them. I'm very glad you liked it!!!!

#bloodymary #iron lung #project hail mary #dear anon #ryland grace #simon iron lung #simon the convict #fic asks #I love getting asks!!!!!!

syn4k

"lock in" is probably one of the most important phrases to enter the public lexicon in the 2020s

joyflameball

sushiisiu

ily (avaliable as a print in my pinned)

Grace and Simon skinny dipping in the biodome, because the water is just this side of cold to not resemble blood at all, and Simon wanted to try and overcome this fear, and Grace is holding his hand and guiding him deeper and deeper with every step until they are up to their necks and Simon has this huge grin slowly appear on his lips and he turns to Grace and breathes out an "I did it" and Grace falls in love all over again because the fake moon is shining in Simon's eyes, twin twinkle stars, and Grace thinks that even if he never saved the stars it wouldn't matter because the ones in Simon's eyes are worth more than entire universes together

or something like that

#bloodymary #simon iron lung #simon the convict #ryland project hail mary #ryland grace #project hail mary #phm #overcoming fear #or something like that #might write it actually lol #if the muse is kind and sleep is slept

feralratbitesu

breakfast from when before i eated it

feralratbitesu

okay. here is my breakfast from before time began

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Andy Weir's Project Hail Mary - All Media Types, David Szymanski's Iron Lung - All Media Types Rating: Mature Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: The Convict | Simon (Iron Lung)/Ryland Grace Characters: The Convict | Simon (Iron Lung), Ryland Grace, Mentioned Rocky (Project Hail Mary) - Character, The Convict | Simon's Mother (Iron Lung) Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Soulmate-Identifying Marks, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, POV The Convict | Simon (Iron Lung), Rain, Undressing, Showering Together, First Kiss, Making Out, Literal Sleeping Together, Fluff, Longing, the act of helping your want-to-be lover take off his soaking clothes cause he only has one arm, the act of telling your want-to-be lover to take off your soaking clothes cause you only have one arm, some teasing, fuck A.I, This work is pure human sleep deprivation Summary:

Simon had survived the unsurvivable but he thought this longing would be the thing to finally end him.

or

Soulmate AU.

#bloodymary #simon iron lung #ryland grace #soulmate AU #this was so much fun to write it deserved the all nighter #uhhhh i don't know what else to tag #i hope yall like it!!!#♥♥♥

omegaweiss01

Coltland Gentry AU where the bros go to space together but when they wake up with no memory of each other, this is what I'm imagining.

Colt: WHO ARE YOU AND WHY DO YOU LOOK LIKE ME?!??!

Ryland: *Confused screaming*

Court: Everyone, stay calm!

Colt: HOW CAN I STAY CALM WHEN MY DOPPELGANGER IS LITERALLY RIGHT THERE?!?!?!?!!

Court: I DUNNO MAYBE SHUT YOUR PIE HOLE FOR ONE SECOND AND LEMME THINK!!

Ryland: *More confused screaming*

versasfanficwastedump

i actually never ever want AO3 to be censored bc nothing is more fun than reading the tags on a fic and going “huh. didn’t know there was a market for that.”

galahadenough

squinting at a tag and trying to decide how badly I want to learn a new word

jejejijiju

Jay and Roy

homunculus-argument

On tumblr, you can say "don't stick a fork in that electric outlet in the wall, getting electrocuted that way is really bad for you", and people will reply with "but what if I use a knife? Is that dangerous too or am I allowed to do that?" And another one is like "op is lying it's actually 100% safe fun and cute uwu" because they live in a house with the electricity cut off. A third one goes "oh my god I had no idea I've been risking my life every single time I poke a fork at the wall. I just like the way the wallpaper feels when I puncture it. No wonder mom yells at me every time I do it! D:"

And then it explodes into an argument concerning whether or not getting electrocuted is inherently, ontologically bad for you or not, because someone shared their story of how getting electroconvulsive therapy cured their depression and saved their life, and therefore OP is wrong for implying that going out of your way to get electrocuted is always wrong and bad in every situation.

wildflowerdaysi

The Royal Portuguese Cabinet of Reading

kink-tomato

This zine, and I cannot over emphasize how funny this is, is for Anne Rice’s Interview with the Vampire

getvalentined

These people blocked me on both Twitter and Tumblr, and then someone used a burner account to go off on me on Twitter. This person insisted that I was singlehandedly responsible for the project falling.

I made one comment, and it was this: