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@myhalfthoughts-blog
An asexual and an aromantic are talking together, when suddenly they are both launched into the air.
“What happened?” they ask each other, confused.
“We arose,” the aromantic said.
“No, I’m pretty sure we ace-ended,” the asexual replied.
Then they hit the ground, which was kind of aspected.
[Text: Can’t be put in the friendzone if you actually value your friendships. Image: Picture of a black man tapping his forehead with his index finger]
So I just reblogged a meme. It was mostly reflexive cause that’s what I do when I see an aro meme. But after I reblogged it i thought, “Hang on, this seems familiar”. So I looked through the meme folder of the memes I’ve created and posted and well would you look at that there it is. The exact same meme. Oh and would you look at that mine has less notes. Typical tbh. Anyway, reblog this version cause it’s the original and wasn’t stolen without credit.
Disappointed yet again by a show giving me good bonding moments, only to use them as fuel for romantic drama. So I made this.
not voting isn’t refusing to play the game. You’re in this country, you’re subject to the game whether you like it or not. The only way not to play is to leave, and the vast majority of us don’t have that option.
Not voting is playing the game but saying ‘pass’ every time your turn comes up and then wondering why you lost.
Making young people not vote is actually a tactic used in politics to keep the satus quo. The young vote is always the one for change, so dissuading them from voting at all is actually a political tactic used by the people in charge to keep themselves there. Voting is rebellion.
Voting is rebellion.
AZIRAPHALE + CROWLEY
This is me.
I’m tagged in this photo and I don’t like it
Add “distress” to your pain scale
Pain scale? More like pain in the booty. No two people seem to read it the same way, and chronic folks tend to downplay their pain.
So here’s an idea: when asked to rate your pain, provide a number to rate your distress levels in addition to your pain levels.
Some examples:
“I’m at a 5 on the pain scale, but my distress is basically a 1 because this is my usual.”
“I’m at a 3 on the pain scale, but my distress is a 7 because this is new pain and affects a part of my body that’s very important to my work.”
It’s a great way to consider how your pain is impacting you—and to get a doctor’s attention where it’s actually needed.
OP is a genius
some good consent phrases
“May I hug you?”
“When I ask you if you want to do something, you know it’s always okay to say no, right?”
“Let me know if you get uncomfortable, okay?”
“How do you feel about (x activity)?”
(When someone’s insecure about having said no and asks if it’s okay/if you’re mad or upset they said no) “I’m disappointed to not do the thing, of course, but I’m much more glad you were willing to tell me (no/that you were uncomfortable/etc.). That’s really important to me. Thank you.”
“I’d ALWAYS rather be told no than make you feel pressured or do anything to hurt you or make you uncomfortable.”
“I care about you, so when something I do hurts you or makes you uncomfortable, I want to know, because I don’t like making you feel bad.”
“You can always change your mind, okay? The moment you wanna (stop/go home/take a break/etc), PLEASE tell me and we’ll stop right away. I won’t make a fuss, I don’t wanna keep going if you don’t want to.”
“Wanna do (x)? It’s okay if not, but I think it would be (fun/worthwhile/prudent).”
(When starting a social phone call): “Hey, are you busy right now?”
(When confirming plans made earlier): “Hey, are you still up for doing (x) at (time) on (day)?”
“Can I vent a little about (x)?”
“Can I tell you something (gross/depressing)?”
“Are you comfortable talking about it?”
“Do you think you could talk me through this problem I’ve been having? If you have the time and emotional energy of course.”
“It’s okay if that doesn’t work for you.”
“I’m interested in spending more time with you. Would you be interested in doing (x) together on (y day)?”
“No? Well let me know if you ever want to do something else.” (leave it open! don’t nag! let it go!)
“You don’t seem very interested in this. Should we skip it?”
(When someone doesn’t seem interested in something you were suggesting) “We can just (do something you both want to do) instead.” (don’t try to get them to do the thing again! let it go!)
Consent culture - it’s about way more than just sex!
Give people as much freedom as possible to make their own choices without pressure or control.
Even children deserve as much autonomy as allows them to remain safe and get their needs met - remember, you can’t train a child to make good/safe/healthy choices without ever giving them choices. A child who is taught to respect consent is a child who doesn’t assault people! A child who knows they have a right to say no is a child who knows that someone who infringes on their autonomy isn’t supposed to do that.
A consent-conscious relationship is a healthier and safer relationship, and a person who is aware of and deliberate about asking for, giving, receiving, refusing, and accepting refusals of consent is a healthier and safer person.
A breakdown of what's happening in Puerto Rico:
On Saturday July 14 the not for profit journalism group Center for Investigative Journalism released 900 pages were released of private conversations between the current governor or Puerto Rico, Ricardo Rosselló and others from his party.
In the chat group were Luis Rivera Marín, Rosselló’s secretary of state; Christian Sobrino, who held a series of important economic posts; Carlos Bermúdez, a one-time communications aide; Edwin Miranda, a communications consultant; Interior Secretary Ricardo Llerandi; Public Affairs Secretary Anthony Maceira and Elías Sánchez, one-time representative to the board overseeing Puerto Rico’s bankruptcy.
These 900 pages revealed that they had been running a smear campaign against the opposition. That he had threatened to set the police on journalists and to set up a troll network against any opposition or critics even going so far on commenting on wishing the death of Carmen Yulín Cruz the mayor or San Juan. Homophobic, racist and sexist comments.
Even more horrific was how they mocked the dead who had passed after hurricane Maria. A natural phenomenon that devestated the island. How they held back efforts to help to use the hysteria as leverage.
Prior to this was the arrest of two senior administration officials (also part of Ricardos party) who were arrested and charged with fraud. abusing federal work contracts from the Department of Education and the Health Insurance Administration (ASES).
Puerto Ricans are currently protesting and taking to the streets both on the island and in the States. Police have already gotten violent with protestors and a member of Ricardos party stated that more force would be taken.
Ricardo has released a statement saying that he refuses to resign from office. Puerto Rico will be holding another massive protest on July 17th.
Keep putting pressure on este sapingo cabron and keep Puerto Rico and its people in your thoughts. Fuerza y a la lucha mi gente!
Here’s the full 800+ page chat
(With more to come potentially. 7/17/2019)
content warning: homophobia, transphobia, sexism, utter disrespect for the deceased hurricane victims, just...so many vile things.
@avemariaa @punkeo @mulatt-hoe @dumbassrights
@latinexplains
if youre an adult and still worried about aphobia in 2018 i am asking you to go get some help because if a nonexistent form of oppression youre RPing gives you that much stress i dont know how youll manage when confronted with actual problems in your life (or how youll confront the problems that are mislabeled as ‘aphobia’). and like if it were just you wasting your own time i wouldnt care but adults in the community using their positions of authority to scare impressionable kids into thinking the world hates them for not having sex is really nasty. like i know theyre convinced that theyre doing good but its still really fucked up regardless of intentions and everyones got enough to worry about as is
Aphobes really have deluded themselves into thinking they’re righteous, haven’t they? The word of some lonely, bitter 20-year-old white blogger is held up to be the revolution of the hour. Complete with the wrong definition of asexuality.
Your ‘ace discourse’ has devolved to the point where you mock “young people who don’t want to have sex” as if there aren’t any very dangerous, very real problems that might arise from that. If you had any shred of human compassion, you’d recognize them. But no, all you’re concerned about is circulating the same few tumblr fake-aspec troll posts as if they’re the epitome of aphobia.
Meanwhile, the real apec community is teaching ourselves how to combat intersectional oppression that your white ass couldn’t understand. Don’t talk like you know ‘oppression’ when you say us professional historians, lgbt+ news sources, activists of color, and university funded doctorate dissertations are delusional. I heard words exactly like yours when I was identifying as nonbinary and bisexual. I didn’t believe them then, I won’t believe them now.
It doesn’t take more than a little digging to find professional activists that talk about facing and researching institutional aphobia. You’d know that, if you weren’t locked in your echo chamber of internet edginess. But it takes a lot of toxic gall to tell people suffering from aphobia to ‘find help’, because funnily enough, that’s exactly what we’re doing. Just not the way you want.
It’s easy enough to claim something doesn’t ‘count’ as oppression. People do it all the time, whether they’re conservative incels or edgy radicals. But as an activist against aphobia, I’ve spent many painful years healing from a lost childhood, navigating through a world that hunts me, and preparing for an unsafe future. And I’ve decided to share what I’ve learned with the world.
Because face it - what you really want is for aspec people to straight up not exist. And your way of achieving that? Trying to erase the growing number of aspec people bonding together, creating and sharing important resources, and helping each other grow. If you can look at the small fraction of aspec media I’ve included in this post, and still think ‘adults worried about aphobia’ should be ignored, you’re the one that needs help.
and yet the world is silent…
Reblog to spread this. This isn’t something to keep silent on.
I would never want somethin like that to happen! Hell, i condemn it. But … I try to at least keep myself informed a little bit. Are there any good sources for this?
Here (The Atlantic)
Here (Washington Post)
Here (The Guardian)
Here (Independent)
Hey thank you so much for the sources!
The world is silent because most of us didn’t know!
educate yourself.
Nike’s new ad is targeted at Latina women and it is phenomenal!!!
This ad got me hyped!
¡Vámonos! 🇲🇽
Romantic Ambivalence Survey
Sharing here from Pillowfort:
As promised – you can now take the Romantic Ambivalence Survey designed for people without romantic orientations, people who identify to any degree with wtfromanticism or quoiromanticism, and people who struggle with the concept of romance, romantic orientation, or romantic attraction. The goal of this survey is to find out more about which labels are popular, what people are using them to mean, and how much these identities may or may not intersect with others. The survey will be open and taking responses until August 20th.
We’re shooting for at least 200 responses, so please, if you have access to any other platforms or community spaces, or if you know anyone who might be interested, consider sharing the link further. Optionally, I’d also appreciate it if you could link me back to anyplace public that it’s been shared, so that I can also keep a running list of all such places.
Click here to take the Romantic Ambivalence Survey.
What to avoid on prime day
A friendship breakup can be just as painful as a romantic one.
“People I’ve spoken to in my research have said the end of a friendship felt much more personal and much more painful than a romantic breakup. They said it was more like a death — this person you care about disappearing from your life and the intense sadness that follows,” she says.
hard core relate
Amatonormativity
Amatonormativity is like comp het for romance. It's when you feel societal pressure to be romantically attracted to someone so you feel a simulation of romantic attraction towards people. I say simulation as its not really true romantic feelings. Not all aromantics deal with amatonormativity but lots do.
Symptoms
Romantically only liking unattainable people eg, celebrities or fictional characters
Not being able to fantasize about said unattainable person in romantic situations
Feeling like you have to perform romance (in relationships or towards someone to get them to like you
Confusing platonic feelings with romantic, eg. I care about you a lot so I must be romantically attracted to you.
How to combat it
Spread the word. Talking about amatonormativity let's more people know about it and thus letting other aros learn the signs and know that they aren't alone or any less aro for these feelings. Whilst amatonormativity is the worst for aromantics and aro specs, it still does affect other people. People who whilst feeling romantic attraction, recognise that a romantic relationship isn't for them do experience amatonormativity.
Teach people that it's okay and perfectly fine not to feel romantic attraction or want a romantic relationship.
Bring movies into the spotlight which don't have romantic relationships. the House With A Clock In It's Walls is a good movie with no romance. It's even stated that the relationship between the two adults is only platonic. It's also a good movie because it has Jack Black in it.
In short: Amatonormativity sucks and we should normalise non romantic relationships being equal to romantic relationships and not needing romance to be fulfilled
honestly where the show really succeeds in aziraphale and crowley is taking the time to show their familiarity, their domesticity with one another. their conversations meander and ramble; they talk about things other than the antichrist. they have lives and histories with each other outside the main plot. nobody could call the velvet underground bebop. ducks! that’s what water slides off of/just drive the car. arguing about driving 90 miles an hour in central london. these are all the sorts of things that flash bang media these days tends to cut because they’re not showy, they’re not really even relevant. cutting these moments is an easy way to cut time, stretch budgets, streamline narratives. i think we’re more used to now getting an “establishing” scene where we are meant to understand a relationship’s dynamic, and the rest of the time that dynamic stays implied through the movement of the narrative. but good omens revisits these moments again and again. it invites us into a relationship that has movement, depth, give and take, nuance. it invites us into a relationship that has problems and one that has beauty. crowley doesn’t just show up to save aziraphale in 1793 and 1941; they banter back and forth while it’s happening. it’s easy to see them as people that the plot is happening to, rather than characters reacting to a plot. they live and breathe. it’s really beautiful.
Honestly keeping all these rather domestic bits of dialogue in the show was probably the best way to display a relationship and I wish more media followed suit.
Small moments of familiarity, for example the ‘well you did take credit for the sapnish inquisition’ conversation makes me believe in their history. Little moments of playful arguing ‘one single better idea?’ or ‘ducks!’ ‘what about ducks’ made me relate to their relationship as authentic (I have similar interactions with the people in my life).
They even go on tangents mid conversation sometimes, discussing the antichrist and suddenly there’s a conversation about putting music on and Velvet Underground. Because real human conversation isn’t always linear.
Let’s not forget the part the performers played in this as well. David Tenant’s ability to purposefully stutter and stumble on lines that gives them a sense of authenticity. Most memorable being the wall slam and immediately after there’s a ‘wha- oh- we- yes of course’, it makes it feel like a real person clamouring for a witty response; and most of the time actors would be told to just deliver the line.
Michael Sheen delivers almost every line perfectly throughout the whole show but in relation to this point, of establishing familiarity and relationship, one particular moment stands out to me; and that’s 'just drive the car’ while Crowley is busy ranting about ducks. The amount of exasperation he manages to pour into what reads as a pretty simple line. I suddenly believe that Aziraphale has spent 6000 years listening to this demon go off on tangents and hes at his wits end so please just drive the damn car.
There’s many many more instances of course; 'I like pears’, or the unforgettable discussion revolving around Anthony J Crowley. 'You don’t like it?’ 'I’ll get used to it’. But I feel like I’m rambling now.
It helps to suspend the belief of a relationship in a consistent and believeable way - because these kinds of interactions are what happen in real life. Unlike in most instances of media where a relationship is set up with one or two establishing events and then expected to be carried through for the rest of the medium.
Good omens was incredible in its writing and performance I will forever respect it and look up to it as such.
