Today's society with the prevalence of Social Media and personal blogs has led to a glut of fake personalities, narcissism, and overindulgent bullying egos. How do you keep yourself in check without bending to peer pressure?
How Many Layers of Mediocrity Did You Add to Your Shell Today?
For most, the above question would be deemed offensive and condescending. It implies that by default the person being asked leads a mediocre life, and generally acts rather than being genuine.
Some context is needed for us to properly break this down into something profoundly meaningful.
So let's just get you to do a simple 5-Step Mind and Memory Challenge.
Think back to last Tuesday. Take a minute or two, and remember your day, as much as you can, from the time you woke up, until the time you went to sleep.
Now, think back to the Tuesday before that, and also try to remember the day from start to finish.
And again, cast your mind back to the Tuesday before that - so now you are looking roughly 3 weeks into your past. Try hard to remember the day from start to finish. Are you having difficulty yet? Can you remember anything especially significant about that specific Tuesday?
Now go back in your mind to the Tuesday before that. You are trying to remember the Tuesday approximately 4 weeks ago.
Finally, using your memory again, ask yourself what distinguished each Tuesday as being different from the other. What stands out in your mind?
Such Challenges are especially useful for getting mentally prepared to prompt your thought processes into a type of internal investigation that it rarely, if ever, does.
I actually did this challenge quite some time back, and I was more than hard pressed to remember any differences. Sadly, all I could vaguely remember was that there was no break from the same routine for those Tuesdays. That's it, that's all I could say, I knew I had carried on the same routine for those Tuesdays that I always did. In fact, practically every day was indistinguishable, repetitive, and I couldn't name the day or date of the last thing that occurred that stood out as being a significant positive occurrence.
Negative occurrences..? That was another matter. I always had a lot to groan about.
I have tried this on several individuals also, and had pretty much the same results. It makes you think, and can make you uncomfortable in a deep and unfamiliar way. Why is that..?
Obsession with Happiness without knowing what True Happiness is
It all comes down to catching a glimpse of the preposterous nature of our lives which can be summarized as follows: A Pursuit of Happiness through a competitive obsession to obtain pleasures and comforts via the acquisition of impermanent consumables, which serve as addictive yet unsatisfactory finite attachments, prompting a compulsive, repetitive, and exponential drive to seek an ever greater amount of impermanent consumables by any means necessary, at whatever cost, without any limits; often compelled by a herd instinct to imitate the actions of others in an attempt to manufacture a corporately approved shell of ego while seeking an agreeable sense of individuality and self validation in addition to a perpetual quest seeking positive peer affirmation.
That's quite a mouthful, right..? Can I simplify it down a bit..?
Basically, we are indoctrinated from a very young age that stuff, and lots of stuff, can make us happy, feel mental and physical pleasure, and be comfortable. To be attractive to others, the more stuff you get and show off, the better it will be. Especially the stuff that gets advertised to you as being the most essential, trendiest and most in-demand stuff. So study hard, be someone who is competitive, get a good job that pays good money, and get good stuff. Don't stop there, be more competitive, get a better job, get more money, get more stuff. Be a winner, and don't stop there, don't let anyone be above you, just fight hand, tooth, and nail to get what you want. Just do it. And do it again, and again, and again...
And then, maybe when you least expect it, you will find yourself drawing in your last breath, and in that moment - do you think you will FINALLY be happy**..?** It will all have been worth it**..?**
The above is the reality for billions of people worldwide, so, it's got to be OK, right**..?**
It's not like anyone has an option, unless they are born into wealth and don't have to endure all the struggling and suffering in the pursuit of happiness, right**..?**
They say that money is the root of all evil, but I do my best and work my hardest to get the things that me and my family need to be happy and comfortable, so I will be happy one day, right**..?**
No pain, no gain, right**..?**
Fake it until you make it, right**..?**
Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. Wrong.
The precise thing that is wrong with these assumptions, and the nature of life described above, is that from the level of the individual, all the way through to entire populations spanning the world, they all have been sold on the concept and blind pursuit of FAKE HAPPINESS. That's it.
A terrible misconception of what the True Happiness in being Alive really is.
Sufferings, trials, and tribulations of life
Entire generations being born, pursuing materialistically based happiness that they see normalized by the majority, enduring the sufferings, trials, and tribulations of a life dedicated to that pursuit, sometimes corruptly, and many times at the expense of others, to never actually experience true bliss - even to the moment of their last breath.
It is this lack of understanding that can be found at the root of every conflict, every war, genocide, famine, and crime. Whether seeking power, wealth, fame, notoriety, or just trying to live a decent, *normal* life, the desired bliss can never be found, because once you have made the attachments, they will bring you suffering.
The more 'stuff' you have, the more possessive you will be about guarding that stuff, while always looking for bigger, better, newer versions. The chase will not end in your lifetime.
Without truly understanding what Happiness is, mankind blunderingly assumes it is to be found in the taking on of the role of a mindless drone, following the herd instinct, earning and spending, attaching to the idea that the more stuff you have, the happier you will be. What a perfect deception that ultimately only benefits a select few whose hands are all over the money made from giving you the proverbial 'stuff'.
Youth Mind and the Societal Programming
We aren't created as mindless drones. We humans come from the womb wide eyed and with a pure mind, pure consciousness,helpless and dependent for a time on our parents love, nurturing, and nourishment. It's not long after that we begin to choose to accept what is thrust in our faces throughout our younger years by the Corporations, by the Mainstream Media, by the Movie and Pop Music Industries, the Fashion Houses, by what we see our friends wearing, what we see our parents buying. It's like kids are shuffled through Elementary and High School learning as if they are drones being built on an assembly line of indoctrination. By the time they leave high school, the ink has dried, the glue has set, and with raging hormones and a magnified desire to stand out in a crowd they launch into early adulthood wishing to be years older already and on top of the game. It doesn't take too long for the metamorphosis to occur, and the routine to lock itself in place, before they are no more than mindless drones following the beat of a silent drum.
We humans complain. For every challenge and every problem in life, we complain. About the challenges and problems in our society and governments, and those around us, we complain. We call for change, but are unwilling to change ourselves. We stay as mindless drones on the path that we think will take us to happiness. We humans get so self-absorbed in our own little worlds, our own little melodramas, that we ignore the true issue of knowing what is true happiness, and because we want to stay on our path, we complain about the problems around us, but do nothing except blame others.
So, if the problem is not having an understanding of what Happiness is, what can be done..?
First, recognize that you have to do a clean-out of the mind. It has become noisy, disordered, and littered with a lot of useless junk.
We spend a lot of attention, time, and money - for grooming our outward appearance, be it the hair, clothes, shoes, accessories, or even in some cases modifying through cosmetic surgeries.
We also spend a lot of time caring for the appearance of our vehicles, our homes, and in recent years, a huge amount of time and attention to crafting our online profiles through various social media platforms... But what about our mind..?
At the end of the day, when we feel tired and somewhat dirty, we go to the shower or bathe to cleanse ourselves, using pleasant smelling shampoo and body washes. We like to then dress in clean clothes or nightwear. All clean, all fresh, all sanitized.
But what about Your mind..?
How do we clean and sanitize our mind in such a way as to begin to have clarity to accurately contemplate what it means to be truly happy..?
Make time, even a few minutes, to retreat away from the noisy world and be alone, and sit down. Close your eyes. Imagine a volume dial in your mind that controls all the noisy thoughts, and begin to turn it down. Quieten those thoughts. Actually, dismiss those thoughts. One by one, just like you are closing the window panes on a computer, shut off the thoughts. If a thought like "I wonder what I will eat tonight?", for example, pops up in your mind, dismiss it. Finding it difficult..?
A 'FIND YOURSELF' MEDITATION
Try concentrating on slowly counting down from 10 to 1. Regardless of how long you spend on focusing on a number, forget time, just focus ONLY on the number. See it in your mind, hear it in your mind. Don't have any other thoughts except that number. Quite quickly you will find yourself in a very peaceful state of mind; and actually for the first time in a very, very long time, you will begin to feel a sense of deep, inner peace. What you are doing is cleaning your mind through meditation. If your are counting down, then you are meditating, and contemplating numbers. Your mind is 100% switching on, your mind is taking a beautiful shower of its own, and any brain fog will be washed away.
As you sense this inner peace, your very essence, your 'pure mind' (consciousness without noisy thoughts) will emerge. You will begin to perceive a sense of deep inner satisfaction - almost as if for the first time you experience yourself, you, the REAL you, to the point where you will almost want to say "Here I am..!! After all this time, I have found myself..!!", and this perception, this feeling, can be profoundly satisfying and life-changing. It is the proverbial mirror on the wall which you will see clearly as you have now cleansed your mind in the moment of the noisy thoughts and distracting concepts.
There - did you see them..? The keywords I used..?
PROFOUNDLY SATISFYING and LIFE-CHANGING
It is a state of mind then, that most amazing feeling.
You see, the capacity to know true happiness is already within you. You will not meet it somewhere outside of yourself, and you cannot buy it. It must well up like a fountain from deep within your heart - and it will seem like a rushing torrent of purpose, and it will be a compassionate heart..!! How so..? Because you will suddenly feel like you can save the world, that you have found the secret to save many from suffering - and indeed you would be right, because it will just be the very start of an amazing journey, a pilgrimage to know the essence of who you are, and to be able to release others from the same suffering you endured for so long.
The capacity to know true happiness is already within you. You will not meet it somewhere outside of yourself, and you cannot buy it. It must well up like a fountain from deep within you.
Instead of rushing out to trade in your 9 month old cellphone for the latest version, take time to sit quietly, and contemplate what you have to do to see yourself as a member of the human race; and that race, gender, wealth and status mean nothing to the fact. You are not above, or below, anyone. You are unique as the person you are, but you are simply a member of the human race. Look at all others with compassion, as equals, the majority of which are suffering their own daily ordeals and tragedies.
Acts of selfishness and greed are not positive things, even though many encourage the 'Do what you want, when and how you want to do it' mentality, to find happiness - they are negative things, and provoke ignorance, arrogance, and suffering. Cause and effect will always balance out your actions by repaying you what you give. Promotion of ego, and acts derived from attention craving, will lead to rampant narcissism and put you far away from having a compassionate heart.
Clear out the Clutter of the Mind
Pretty soon after cultivating more time to yourself to meditate and contemplate like this, you will see how so much of the junk you have accumulated around you is just that - junk. You'll begin to see how much worrying, stress, anxiety, and suffering you have gone through for just obtaining unrewarding impermanent junk. You will begin to instinctively feel the artificial distractions as just that, junk that is so unnecessary, and will want to begin trashing it, or donating it. You clear out the clutter in your mind, you better believe you will begin to clear out the clutter around you. Life changes will occur, as you begin to live clear minded more and more. It's a most fascinating and wonderful journey that guarantees you will see yourself, this world, and all people differently, and in ways you could never have previously imagined.
The Core of Life is the Struggle for Survival and the Suffering in-between
Will there still be suffering in your life..? Of course..!!
The world, and this life, is guaranteed to bring suffering, but finally you will have a method to master how your mind deals with that suffering, how to recognize it, and how to transmute it into something else, not just lessons to learn from, but lessons in compassion to help others who you perceive and observe going through the same crises that you have already emerged from.
Remember that Suffering is also Nature's hard-wired way of teaching us essential lessons. We cannot effectively avoid it our whole lives, but it is better to learn from it so as not to repeat the same mistakes over and over.
Don't settle for mediocrity, or living as a mindless drone for the Materialistic World
Make a pledge, a vow, an irreversible promise to become a new person by cleansing the mind and finding the supreme satisfaction of meeting the person you really are in essence, and take the most noble of journeys to be compassionate, clear minded, patient, loving, honest, and satisfied. It's not too late. All it takes is you, to get the journey started.
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