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Does the Internet not realize and accept that as nasty as it is, friends say horrible shit to each other ALL THE TIME?!? When you are deeply connected to and love someone you also have the power to hurt them greatly. Hell, of anyone on this planet that I have ever hurt, I would say the one I’ve hurt the most is my mother. Careless horrible things I’ve said in anger and frustration. Proclamations of how unfair and terrible she’s treated me. Lists of how I could do better, how she has screwed me up or held me back. I don’t mean any of these things, but I know my mom. I know how to lash out and hurt her. Sometimes I ask forgiveness and sometimes enough time passes that we come back together naturally.
If you think the writers can’t have Stiles and Scott say terrible hurtful things to each other then you are negating a huge part of realistic human relations. Stiles can’t possibly know what Scott is going through in these moments, he can’t see or feel beyond his own stress and pain and fear. He lashed out at Scott because he has come to rely so much on his best friend being there, on his strength and help. He is afraid. The show has established MANY times just how scared shitless Stiles is of losing his father, and his father’s approval. He is losing him as this encounter is occurring, and all he can think is why wasn’t Scott, the one with the power, the one who saves everyone, there to save his father. Is it cruel and unrealistic to expect of Scott? Sure as hell is. Is it a totally understandable and natural human reaction? Oh fuck yes.
Go ahead and hate Stiles as a character if you like. I’m not here to tell you you have to like him. I’m here to tell you that this is LEGITIMATE HUMAN PSYCHOLOGY. His reaction is FAR from unnatural, he is lashing out at the person he has relied so much on. He couldn’t rely on Scott this time, and it makes Stiles aware of his own powerlessness and uselessness, and how fragile everything is. Scott has always been this pillar of strength, and together they have faced so much. Right now they are going through a very difficult time, exacerbated by Stiles’ fears of the future, and the pain he felt when Scott wouldn’t trust him or listen to him about Theo. Scott is still dealing with his own sense of guilt towards everything spiralling out of control, and his own issues of mistrust with Stiles. They are two teenagers, full of emotions and flaws. Scott is trying to recoup. He has hit his bottom and realizes he must claw his way back up and repair the damage. Stiles is on the absolute brink of his lowest. His father’s life is all that is separating him from overwhelming despair and the type of pain he’s already dealt with once. He is ready to snap, and since it is his father currently in jeopardy, Scott, the ever responsible best friend figure, is the only other one Stiles can direct that pain and fury towards. Really he is feeling these overwhelming fears towards existence and life itself, but the human mind deals better with a focus. Scott is ‘the saviour’, but he wasn’t there this time, and Stiles, as irrational as it is, wants someone and something to blame. He needs somewhere to pour all these feelings that are drowning him. Sadly, Scott is on the receiving end.
So yes. It sucks, but it is real fucking life. People hurt the ones they love most all the time. The take advantage of and diminish them without even realizing it. They scapegoat and blame, even when it makes no sense. When they are so mad at themselves, at the black feelings eating away at their own hearts, they turn it onto others because it is easier. Before you dismiss Stiles as just being a douchebag for being nasty to Scott, try to understand that the writers have probably all had relationships before, they know that things aren’t always perfect between family and friends. Learn about the actual psychology of loss and pain and blame and so many other things. It will help you understand that the writers are showing you the truth. People hurt each other every day. They will keep on doing so. The writers are doing a good job of showing how we walk down such paths, slowly at first, then running full speed. The accidental and intentional words that can slip out in a time of emotion. I saw this as one of the most honest and real moments between the two of them. More than their witty banter it shows their capacity to hurt each other, to dismiss and take each other for granted. True, it is one sided in these moments, but that is often how it happens. People aren’t always in tune, in the same headspace emotionally. So no, it isn’t okay and excusable, Stiles is totally acting like a dick. But he’s acting this way because that is one of the most natural ways that people do react. When we hurt, we try to make others hurt too. It’s ugly, but it is too often the truth.
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