Twist into my welcomed mind

Welcome to my blog: I enjoy good things and hate bad things

[sashayed]

but ykw at least i'm not on mount everest. at least i'm not paying tens of thousands of dollars to slowly suffocate in a 300-person line at the gates of hell. never in my life will i have to be steered in a hypoxic stupor through the maze of poop and corpses atop mount everest. on this earth a lot of horrible things can happen to you without your permission but there are a few that you have to opt into. you can just say no thanks! and be guaranteed never to have to be on mount everest. much to be grateful for actually

[sashayed]

still not on mount everest this morning 😌 alhamdulillah

[junktastic]

[spicymancer]

Yeah okay.

[tonyzaret]

Dating as a Male Toon is very difficult if you are not attracted to yourself but with large Eyelashes

[valtsv]

i'm like a fujoshi but for dead people

[valtsv]

if you could see the thread i'm hanging on by you would not say these things to me

[markovchaingang]

blorbo from my shows would actually be a communist, but unfortunately they'd be a trotskyite so really it would've been preferable for them to just be a fascist tbh

[seven-oh-four]

this is your captain speaking. do you guys remember 9/11 [escalating clamor of passengers freaking out] woah woah hey hey i was just curious. christ. am i not allowed to make conversation

[heavenlyhorses]

[supreme-leader-stoat]

[darkieforfun]

[northshorewave]

Someone on Reddit mentioned 'fragtok' and my first thought, obviously, was a social media community of soldiers discussing the best ways to kill their commanding officers and make it look like an accident. (It's 'fragrance-tok', apparently.)

[artbyblastweave]

Been working on this new kind of Guillotine where instead of one blade that comes down really fast from above, it's a long serrated hacksaw that goes back and forth sideways fairly slow. And instead of one guy throwing the lever, it's two guys on either end of the saw walking back and forth, back and forth. And obviously this presents a pretty massive improvement over the original design on several important fronts, namely there's a 100 percent increase in jobs created. Good jobs, government jobs, stable work. And also very slightly more leeway if it turns out we got the wrong guy. Several more seconds after the two guys start walking back and forth for someone to come running up with a pardon from the governor, especially if you forgot to sharpen the blades. Two distinct improvements at least. The Patent Office doesn't see it that way though

[artbyblastweave]

"Oh, that's loud. That's much louder, that's gonna be really loud." Look. From the perspective of someone at the back of the crowd, under the current situation- for all those guys know, you could have stuck a prison uniform full of straw and potatoes under there. They've got no verification anything happened at all. Could be an op. All of those guys could still be alive somewhere under new names, as far as someone near the back of the crowd is concerned. And I don't know about you, but I don't think we can afford to undermine trust in institutions any more than we already have

[0v9]

Well, you know what they say; Rome was built in a day, and if you're going any slower than that, you're basically fucked with no hope at all

[atmodeforce]

The B-52s creepypasta youtube thumbnail

[atmodeforce]

[ex-riddlecats]

"he would not fucking say that" but its about a character being a leftist. he would not fucking believe that

[ex-riddlecats]

media literacy is knowing when a character would say "i dont vote. why are you bringing politics into this?" no matter how mad it makes you to hear somebody irl say the same thing

[halogenwarrior]

This goes for a good amount of the characters who are complained about "oh no they were a cop in the timeskip", a lot of the time they wouldn't have an issue with being a cop and it is perfectly in character.

[st-just]

The number of people who go like 'my beloved war criminal blorbo!' but then act like you pour a drink on them if you suggest they'd be a Republican is pretty funny, honestly.

[dungeonmastersconsortium]

Me stepping onto the balcony to address my followers

[justsomeguycore]

horror movie showing a child’s drawing of the monster or ghost or whatever but instead of a little kid and crayons they’re like a preteen and it’s manga style

[akashicrecord]

[doubleca5t]

[kerryweaverlesbian]

What if the Truman show did a queerbait arc

[kerryweaverlesbian]

What if the Truman show did a queerbait arc but then they found out Truman was gay for real and had to recalibrate and their tv network would have to take a definitive stance on homosexuality, yay or nay in the late 90s and it's not like they can recast Truman. They would have to either plot him into an it's okay to be gay fake happy relationship like they did with his tv wife or try and scare him off homosexuality by doing homophobic gay misery storylines at him to try and keep him firmly in the closet.

[i-want-a-bagel]

adding my favorite tags by @clarafordahwin

[femmenietzsche]

Random blonde guy on the light rail suddenly exploded in a fountain of gore and an angel in a hi vis jacket materialized and said Don't worry it's just G*d working on a new NPC type and offered everybody on the train a free three week indulgence

[femmenietzsche]