goddamnit

nothing matters lol.... unless? the jpeg that got stuck between your posts and died. part-time librarian, almost-full-time postie

[roughentumble]

my friend just told me that there's a secret second dashboard that solely contains posts from people you've turned on post notifications for, and when i click the link in the messages it opens it within the tumblr app, so the tumblr app also has a secret second dashboard for post notification blogs, and the only way to access it is to open the link for it within the app.

i literally love tumblr

[nightpool]

i have a private pinned post that just has a link to this dashboard on it, it's great. two dashboards for life

[cyle]

wow! i was really hoping someone would organically reverse-engineer this and find that dash.

here are a few other "secret" dashboards:

Posts from your "crushes"

"What you missed" (will be empty if you already visit Tumblr every day)

"Trending"

these are all just taking existing feeds of content and putting them in a dashboard-like format... the "Stuff for you" tab/feed is the same idea.

[ruimtetijd]

[blurrymango]

I swear if the link in the original post is a virus I'll be so upset.

[ruimtetijd]

nope! i hovered over the link and this popped up on the bottom of the browser. here's all the links in order:

https://www.tumblr.com/timeline/blog_subscriptions

https://www.tumblr.com/timeline/crushes

https://www.tumblr.com/timeline/what_you_missed

https://www.tumblr.com/timeline/trending

https://www.tumblr.com/timeline/for_you

[tomorrowillbeyou]

[mattpresents]

How do you know you're not Asexual? Maybe you just haven't met the right nobody.

[nekojamas]

chugging mealdrink before bed call that bedtime pouring

[a-kind-of-merry-war]

hello! I'm so sorry to be asking about a post from 2024 but do you have the page number of Die Bussordnungen der abendländischen Kirche nebst einer rechtsgeschichtichen Einleitung that that quote about the 11th century strap-ons is from? I'm trying to search-in-document for the quote but since it's all in German I'm struggling a bit (not sure what the exact German/English translation is). Thanks for reading, enormous fan of your research!

Hello!! Okay its been two laptops and two separate browsers since then BUT I think it's at this link: https://archive.org/details/diebussordnungen00wass/page/658/mode/1up

Page 658, if it moves, and section C. CXLII -

(also the section under is also about dildonic goings-on)

I've copied it out under the cut!

ALSO, my standard warning: because this is a Penitential it's not a Great Source because priests were randy and untrustworthy, however I'm willing to give it the benefit of the doubt because of the court case I mentioned in the main post!

(If you're doing something academic its good to have the above warning. If you're looking for this because, like me, you wanted to write a book about a character fucking their husband with the strap-on gifted to them by their shared boyfriend then its slightly less important lmao)

I hope this helps! 💖

Latin:

C. CXLII. Fecisti, quod quedam mulieres facere solent, ut faceres quoddam molimen aut macbinamentum in modum virilis membri ad mensuram tuae voluntatis, et illud loco verendorum tuorum aut alterius cum aliquibus ligaturis colligares, et fornicationem faceres cum aliis mulierculis, vel alie eodem instrumento, sive alio 4) tecum? Si fecisti, tres5) annos per legitimas ferias penit. C. CXLIII. Fecisti, quod quedam mulieres facere solent, ut jam supra dicto molimine , vel alio aliquo machinamento , tu ipsa in te solam faceres fornicationem? Si fecisti, I ann. peuit.

Terrible Google translate:

C. CXLII Did you do what some women are accustomed to do, that you made a certain device or device in the form of a male member to the measure of your will, and instead of your own or another's penis you tied it with some bindings, and committed fornication with other women, or others with the same instrument, or with another [with?] you? If you did it, you are to be punished with three years during the lawful holidays. C. CXLIII. Did you do what some women are accustomed to do, that with the above-mentioned device, or with some other device, you yourself committed fornication alone? If you did it, you are to be punished with one year.

[nekojamas]

You're an angel thank you so much! When I saw your first post it literally stunned me to thrilled silence and made me happier than anything I'd seen in ages, so having the exact reference is so valuable to me. I'm gonna save this and keep it handy for as long as I am humanly able, it just gives me so much joy to have what I'd thought for ages (that the human experience is relatively unchanged even when separated by millenia and material circumstance) by confirming that people were doing stuff even if the church didn't agree with it. People are people and will find a way of living how we want, despite it all!

For context: I do a lot of historical reenactment (I adore it) and there's a lot of grey old men who try and push the "ah well the church wouldn't have allowed it so nobody would do it, therefore we won't be representing that." Which is a perspective that I could never fully get on board with. This reference (and the later court case), to be sappy, just feels like a hand reaching through time to give mine a squeeze.

[fairycosmos]

being called an old soul when you were kid and knowing you just got diagnosed as a weird cunt

[thevulturesquadron]

text: [ “Some of you have forgotten that only three years ago you were perfectly capable of writing an essay, writing a eulogy, telling a bedtime story to a child, and it should worry you that powerful companies have convinced us we can’t do things we’ve been doing for 5000 years.” ]

[importantpics]

[stratfender]

just being myshellf! #turtle

[bellilou42]

There is no moral.

The wolf eats you one day,

And until it does,

The forest is beautiful

[Neverafter - Brennan Lee Mulligan]

[weirdgirlvampire]

again and again and again and again

[unstablebill]

I've been scream laughing at this for several days

[parkayquarts]

hbo max blocks screenshots even when I use the snipping tool AND firefox AND ublock which is a fucking first. i will never understand streaming services blocking the ability to take screenshots thats literally free advertising for your show right there. HOW THE HELL IS SOMEBODY GONNA PIRATE YOUR SHOW THROUGH SCREENSHOTS. JACKASS

[parkayquarts]

somewhere out there is a guy who meticulously takes screenshots of every individual frame of his favorite tv shows and then painstakingly etches each one onto a roll of film which he puts into his old timey projector and recreates the footage as a silent film with his own lavishly hand-lettered dialogue cards and original score that he plays on his upright piano and charges audiences one shiny penny a play. at last, big media has finally outsmarted ol' Zachary Zoetrope

[theheroheart]

PSA for everyone who doesn't know, explained simply

this is NOT because of blocking screenshots, it's because of HOW streaming sites use your computer's hardware to optimise performance, which means the thing rendering the video and the thing capturing your screen aren't the SAME thing. so they can't talk together.

you can fix this by going to your browser settings, searching for "hardware acceleration", and turning that off.

[team-thickness12]

This also fixes screen sharing to other screens. It has been GODSEND

[lucarleigho]

type this in the toolbar to find this setting in firefox: about:preferences#searchResults

[mctreeleth]

ol' Zachary Zoetrope is back in business!

[a-kind-of-merry-war]

it's me and my two sources on medieval strap-ons against the world

[a-kind-of-merry-war]

Right, so.

Source One is Burchard of Worms' Decretum, Book XIX. The Decretum was a collection of canon laws compiled in the early half of the 11th Century. Book XIX, or The Corrector, was a penitential: basically a guidebook for confessors. Here's a sin, have u done it, here's your penance.

One of the questions for women was, essentially, "Did you make a dildo, strap it to yourself and fuck someone with it?". The original text is in Latin, and there's a few translations floating around of what it said. Here's one, which I spent the past three days looking for, because I wanted a direct source:

Have you done what women are wont to do: to make a certain device in the form of a male member to the measure of your will, and to tie it to your own or another woman's genitals with some ties, and commit fornication with other women, or others with the same instrument, or with another with you? - Translated from Latin, taken from "Die Bussordnungen der abendländischen Kirche nebst einer rechtsgeschichtichen Einleitung", F. W. H Wasserschleben

Pretty cut and dry re: the use of strap-ons. And dildos, because the next question is "and did you use this device on yourself?"

The second source is from the trial of Katherina Hetzeldorfer, specifically Female Sodomy: The Trial of Katherina Hetzeldorfer (1477) by Helmut Puff, which has an analysis of the trial as well as a translation of the trial texts.

Katherina is the first recorded woman to be executed for homosexuality. There's a lot to be said about her and the way she performed gender but what I'm interested in today is the strap. So, from the court text itself:

...She made an instrument with a red piece of leather, at the front filled with cotton, and a wooden stick stuck into it, and made a hole through the wooden stick, put a string through, and tied it round; and therewith she had her roguery with the two women...

And there we go! Two sources about people in medieval times using strap-ons, one from around 1020 and one from 1477.

[nekojamas]

I need to make a tunic with text on it or something, like embroider the entry about the 11th century strap-ons or something, as "art"

[sexy-people-contests-2026]

Tumblr Sexyman Contest 2026 Round 1 Part 64

Agent Stone (Sonic the Hedgehog)

Jareth the Goblin King (Labyrinth)

Remaining time: 4 days 22 hours

[sexy-people-contests-2026]

Updated picture

[csny]

the bus is never going to come because im a bad person

[magpied-illustration]

more than just bark.