Welcome To The Chaos

Assorted Star Wars, LOTR, super heroes, stories, memes, & pretty things. Christian, artist, cosplay noob, and sometimes writer. Art blog is @tealfoxarts

[woodwool]

pepsi for grandpa

[crabussy]

gave grandpa his pepsi

[i-drew-this-post]

I drew grandpa with their pepsi

[rabbits-of-negative-euphoria]

Women between 25 and 40:

Have you ever been on a date?

Yes, 5 first dates or fewer.

Yes, 6 first dates or more.

No.

Voting ended onJun 10

[godkillerbrigade]

going to the corner store to get more corners

[fudemushi]

If you met someone with the same last name as you, how surprised would you be?

Not at all, it's very common

A little surprised, but wouldn't immediately assume a connection

I would be surprised and assume there was some relation

I would be very surprised that I *hadn't* met this person, we must be related

Does anyone else with this last name even exist?

Voting ended onJun 3

[groenendaze]

doggy doggy

[groenendaze]

you guys are not ready for this update

[ninjapancake314]

soggy doggy

[froflossy]

Lasso tool doodles

[wikicamp2]

[ninjapancake314]

@o-lei-o-lai-o-lord a relevant post for today I think. On life, even

[masterfuldoodler]

sour cream in ramen?

I've put sour cream in ramen (yum yum)

I've done it and didn't care for it

I haven't done this but I'm intrigued

I haven't done this and don't want to

I hate ramen/sour cream

Voting ended onMay 20

I've been doing this my whole life (it makes the noodles so creamy and rich, a perfect comfort food) but I just realized idk if this is normal...? Surely it is...

[danskjavlarna]

Source details and larger version.

Headaches and migraines throbbing backwards through time.

[sepublic]

I do think it’s interesting how the novel Dracula is meant to be a modern setting from its perspective. It’s very much that genre of story about an ancient fantasy archetype finding itself in a modern setting, complete with the rules-lawyering that often comes with modern parodies (that isn’t to say the stories of Olde didn’t have fun with loopholes either though).

Except Dracula is a story that plays itself straight. The vampire himself is not stupid. He’s possibly the oldest vampire of all which means he upgraded from animal instinct and mindless echoes of past memories to someone who’s regained his critical thinking skills. The story begins because he’s already adapted to how the modern world works now by hiring a solicitor who understands modern laws.

He knows now that he doesn’t have to march into London with an army like he used to; He can just buy property and the laws of London are forced to respect that. Similarly he’s already experimented in and discovered loopholes to vampire rules and limitations; Vampires are bound by the permission of owners so he simply uses his solicitor to buy and own a bunch of properties. If he needs to be invited in, Dracula hypnotizes someone to let him in.

Vampires need to return to their grave every dusk/dawn (whichever comes sooner), which causes their coffin to act as an anchor that limits how far from it they can travel? Dracula simply rations the earth of his grave into fifty coffins and spreads them across London so his range becomes exponentially larger.

All of these things make the story almost come across as a deconstruction and it might just be! It’s just that Dracula the novel became such a trendsetter that people nowadays see it as playing things fully straight. It almost feels as if the novel is written with the idea that readers have a basic understanding of vampires and their rules, so part of the thrill comes in the revelation of how the titular vampire is working around these rules. Likewise I’ve heard it used to be a trope in English literature for a traveler to visit some foreign land with a monster and escape by going home. But here the foreign aspect of the story is just the first (and final) arc; The monster’s plan hinges on coming to the UK itself!

So yeah. Dracula isn’t stupid and he reflects the idea that people of the past had just as common sense as the rest of us, they just had access to less/inaccurate knowledge and things worked differently back then. Dracula would be like… That bit of someone showing a medieval peasant a meme as they comprehend it perfectly and aren’t even wowed by the Doritos. If Dracula was set in the 21st century he’d probably understand social media well enough to become an influencer if he wanted to, though the issue of being invisible in cameras wouldn’t help.

[paranormal-taters]

I think car names need to get stupider. I want to pull up to the function in a 2013 Toyota Perchance.

[pmamtraveller]

Textile art featuring a school of koi fish, by artist Lin Xia.

[badjokesbyjeff]

New York is the exact opposite of Minnesota. New York is where the Big Apple is and Minnesota is where Minneapolis

[spin-the-wheel-polls]

you have this superpower! BUT you have this side-effect

is it worth it?

yes!!

the side effect is bad but ITS WORTH IT

meh it's okay

the side effect makes it unusable/not worth it

Results/option I didn't think of

Voting ended onMay 20

[heartattackinblackdye]

(bloodstained and bruised) how am i? im pretty good just a little tired

[ninjapancake314]

Tagged by @iggyfing to do this picrew. Thanks for the tag, Iggy! :)

No pressure tags: @theunforgivenscone @the-tiny-dragons-tea-room

[chief-cook-and-librarian]

Can't find the post that has this DWJ quote, so I'm making my own for easier reference.

A bunch of us on the DWJ mailing list were wondering about Howl's past - where did he go to school, what field did he study in, how did he e

"Howell Jenkins played rugby for Swansea University, and his doctoral thesis was on Spells -- his first degree was in Philosophy (probably Philosophy with something-or-other, but his interest was philosophy). One day he found himself being pursued by the four brothers of a young lady he'd played ever so slightly fast-and-loose with (no surprises there) who were chanting "Blood for Blod!" as they chased him down the street. Each of them was a huge forward who seemed to plan to use Howell's head for a ball.

Luckily a wing can generally run faster than a forward, and he stayed ahead of them as he made for the shelter of his sister's house, galloping up the steep streets and skidding on the corners like a centaur. He wasn't a magical practitioner in Wales, but he had been reading some particularly interesting spells that week, and as he ran he recited one of them; his hand on the doorknob of the house he intended to take refuge in, he cried out the final word of this spell, and as the door opened found that instead of his sister's hall, it opened into Mrs. Pentstemmon's foyer.

Since the pursuit was hot on his heels, he didn't hesitate, but dived through the door and slammed it behind him.

So now we know. That's how he got into Ingary. Of course, once he had demonstrated such powerful and completely untrained magical ability, Mrs. P had to train him, or there was no telling what trouble he might cause by accident.

It really wasn't her fault that after she *had* trained him, he still caused trouble both by accident and on purpose. It was simply in his nature."