the stranger things finale kind of sucked.
not in a “it was all terrible” way.
but in a “how did we fumble THIS many narrative balls in the FINAL season of a billion-dollar show” way.
THE HOLLY WHEELER PROBLEM
i’ll say it again louder for the people in the upside down.
the holly plotline was useless.
just… narratively unnecessary.
she had more screen time than half of the original cast.
characters we’ve known since season 1 were standing in the corner like forgotten coats while holly and her little stranger squad were running around having their own side quest.
what did it actually change?
remove the holly plotline and you still get:
but suddenly you also get:
• more time for literally anyone who mattered
they said they were “circling back to the core themes.”
FRIENDSHIP AND LOVE PREVAILS MY ASS.
suffering for no actually reason
HOPPER SHOULD HAVE STAYED DEAD
HE. SHOULD. HAVE. STAYED. DEAD.
bob’s death in season 2 hit because it told us something:
that’s what makes horror work.
that’s what makes you hold your breath.
steve falls off a TOWER in season 5 and i don’t even blink.
they have so much plot armor they could walk into the sun and come back with a mild tan.
when everyone is guaranteed to survive, nothing feels dangerous.
and when nothing feels dangerous, nothing feels important. Or real!
hopper staying dead would have:
• and forced eleven to grow on her own
LET ELEVEN BE A PERSON, NOT A PET
do not come in here with that energy.
jane needed independence.
she needed to exist outside of:
netflix’s marketing department
eleven could have escaped.
more reset-to-factory-settings arcs
girl has been through ENOUGH.
they should not have dragged will being in love with mike this long.
2. shut it down early and give will a new love interest
they just let him suffer in the narrative corner for five seasons.
then did nothing with it.
you know what that time could have been?
what were all those clues? those glances? the touches? the tension?
all these for a big Nothing Burger!
people are not wrong when they say the final battle was barely longer than will’s coming out scene.
CONFORMITYGATE AND THE MARKETING MACHINE
netflix knew this was controversial.
because controversy = clicks
we are little corporate pawns in netflix’s chess game.
and they’re playing 4D chess with our feelings.
BACK TO HOLLY (BECAUSE I’M NOT DONE)
ignored her canonical age.
but what was their actual purpose?
Pure aesthetic, zero explanation.
we didn’t need 12 new characters in the FINAL season.
the kids we started with.
the choices this season were… interesting.
that’s the nicest thing i can say.
this could have been a beautiful, focused, emotional ending.
and a finale that felt like it was trying to please everyone and satisfied no one.
i’m going to go lie on my bed and stare at the ceiling now.
reblog if will byers deserved better.