no-cat-ever

Just doing my best

[ultrafacts]

[chaser]

Boss is asleep, cannot stop me from frogposting

[chaser]

First like and this has already found its intended audience

[chaser]

uh oh

[itsmyturnonthegender]

[wherestoriescomefrom]

why did you people come up with russian names for what is supposed to be a movie set in italy. what was the thought process here. why does she sound like she walked out of a tolstoy novel

[wherestoriescomefrom]

an insane response, but i can't fight this. carry on

[wherestoriescomefrom]

im being hunted for sport in the notes

[diomdes]

me, as i force a dollar bill into the self-checkout machine: thats right…..good boy……vore president washington

[diomdes]

im begging all of you to stop reblogging th is

[theanythingmachine]

my first favorite hobby is yapping. second is being extremely quiet and not talking ever at all ever.

[squeakitties]

[necromosss]

As the person who got their R keyboard broken and the world mocked me for being forced to use the uwu language as replacement

My condolences

[commodore-64]

put that back

[sewerfight-deactivated20250114]

Kind of a Reddit AITA post but sometimes it is a little funny to fuck with people in ways that deliberately conform to a stereotype of what they must think of you. the other day I was talking to my friend and I randomly said that I wanted a pet chimpanzee. I'd dress it in person clothes (dungarees and hats) and I'd teach it to love science fiction. And this girl nearby was like "you know how dangerous those things are, right? Also how unethical it is to keep an ape as your pet for your own amusement" and I was already seeing where the conversation was going so I was pretending ignorance like "yea but it wouldn't just be for my amusement. It would have practical points too." And she ignored that statement entirely to say "Well chimpanzees can rip faces off" and I was like. What's the most frustrating thing I can say now. Finally settled on "Mine wouldn't do that though." and you could tell she wanted to hurt me very very badly. Like a chimpanzee would if I had one as a pet

[trollprincess]

“Nobody’s going to want to sit on high-speed rail for fifteen hours to get from New York City to LA.”

Me. I will sit on high-speed rail for fifteen hours. I’ll sit on it for days. I’ll write and read and nap and eat and then do it all over again. I’ll stare out the windows and see America from ground level and not have to drive. I’ll see the Rockies and the deserts and cornfields and the Mississippi River and your house and yours and yours too. I’ll make up stories in my head about the small towns I see as we go along. I’ll see the states I’ve yet to see because driving or flying there is a fucking slog and expensive to boot. I’ll enjoy the ride as much as the destination. And then I’ll do it all over again to come the fuck home.

[trollprincess]

Me getting slammed with notifications on this post in particular:

[gottalovecatss]

Incredible...

[everythingfox]

A fish at heart

[bardlockcafe]

Good morning to everyone but especially to this reddit user

[kactusnz]

it's her HOME and she covered the key points

[rylandsgrace]

Shrek 2 (2004) trivia 

[catchymemes]

[iapislazuli]

when i was at walgreens (at 3 in the morning which explains all of this) the cashier was talking to her coworker about how shed rather be a werewolf than a vampire because vampires are condemned to hell but werewolves arent and then she asked me what i thought and i said vampire because im already condemned to hell and she said in the nicest tone of voice “i dont think anybody is condemned to hell….” paused, stared at me for a few moments, and added on “…not even gay people” 

[iapislazuli]

Happy pride month to the filthiest most brutal read I’ve ever been given in my life

[memewhore]

[girlfriendsofthegalaxy]

u kids really liked this one huh everyone doin ok?

[kibblekez]

This weirdly reminds me of the time the people installing the new water heater at my house found hundreds of living clams and mushrooms under the floor in our basement.

[gallusrostromegalus]

I'm gonna need you to elaborate and provide images if possible because that sounds both horrifying and fucking magical.

[babygirlifier-deactivated202402]

the reason it’s so awesome when the bass at a concert replaces your pulse is that it’s the closest you can get to someone breaking open your ribs and squeezing your heart really hard in their fist

[fearlesscomfort]

it’s because you’re always on that damn plane

[that-house]