[escuerzoresucitado]

[jimmyhoffathecat]

Used the flash to see what all the fucking noise was about

[gryffon]

[orcboxer]

got a crick in my neck and a frog in my throat and a chip on my shoulder and a stick up my ass and now you're gonna stand there puttin words in my mouth? haven't I been through enough?

[backtornado]

insane headline to pair with the actual photo of the beastie itself

this is just a gormless little creature. what are we doing here.

[gaytanic-panic]

[t00thpasteface]

me before i get my paycheck: i'm so excited to spend this on essentials and save the rest wisely

me as soon as that direct deposit hits: you know i've always wanted to learn the theremin

[t-800]

suicidal elvis: i'm going to kill myselvis

[tonysopranoproskater69420]

thanks tvtropes I can always count on you to gas me up

[depsidase]

[plumstreet]

when you have plans in the morning you can still live an eventful & fulfilling life afterwards but when you've got plans in the afternoon? well that's your whole day

[intercal]

some social media manager at doordash has been tagging T-Pain (the rapper) thinking that they're tagging some New Zealand soccer player this is funny as fuck

[moldavite]

good news. the things that used to upset me no longer upset me. bad news. i'm creating an army of bugs to hurt innocent bystanders

[niyarest]

the way she squints oh my god 😭😭😭💗

[x]

[niyarest]

[undeadentropy]

[deadpowol]

[naamahdarling]

I love the implication that, as Larry is an "unpaid trainee", the dog is paid.

[generic-internet-name]

talking like point-and-click game narration to the bugs in my room

[generic-internet-name]

you can't get out that way!

[generic-internet-name]

that's not very helpful.

[generic-internet-name]

maybe the open window will help.

[generic-internet-name]

try the open window instead.

[yellbug]

modesty