I dont post as much online because I'm a bit of a crippling perfectionist or post personal things as I spiral and get too carried away. I believe I have to be consistent for people to even remotely pay attention to my work, so nothing personal and stay with as few OCs as possible. People like familiarity.
But I'm trying not to care anymore and just post for myself, hopefully I'm not problematic lol
I have too many ocs, too many concepts despite I don't plan to make them into actual stories or comics, mostly its better to just do what you want because people are gonna find fault in everything other's do.
The fear someone will steal and profit off my works is still very much there especially with the internet nowadays, even if I don't actually believe anything I make is good enough to steal hence as far I have so much I've made I refused to post or finish, I dunno I am told I'm paranoid alot by others lol, but considering how much shit I've gone through I will throw myself a bone and say that's understandable.
Real life atm is just so shit and its a drag, I'm trying to get someone to look at whats going on with me but I keep getting waved off and so I'm hesitant to ask for help, theres investigation in my physical health right now I am afraid to ask for anything else while this goes on, I should count my lucky stars as the grim reality is if I didn't at least keep contact with my sister as a kid, I'd have no one;
And that doesn't doesn't work too well when you're a 'high functioning' Autistic person with obvious mental issues that have not been looked into, right? Despite I'm not high functioning? But social care is Social Care-less so.
Social services waved me off multiple times stating its a mental health issue.
Doctors waved off my mental health multiple times, saying it's just my autism.
I don't know what I'm doing wrong to basically be swept under the rug for 8+ years now.
I do want to share my whole story, but isn't that dangerous? Is there any point? My story is... alot that I'd feel like shit for sharing it like I'm just being annoying or dramatic. Not just the social care or the doctors stuff.
It's mostly because I just want to be heard and taken seriously tbh, but it could end up going not as I wanted it as the Internet is very malicious and the harm of revisiting these things alone might not be a good idea lol, plus you'd find so much is perment online...














