Whispers in The Dark

Musings of an inperfect writer, artist, nerd and pagan. ADHD AF. Beginner guitarist. Diehard Spuffy, Cangel &Harry/Murphy shipper. Reader & resident Weirdo woman. Welcome to my midlife crisis.

[jamiemarsters]

Pic of the Day: It's International Self Care Day so be sure to take care of yourself today! Maybe go see if you've got any of those little marshmallows... 😉😉 James Marsters #Spike being all about the self care in #Buffy 3.8 "Lovers Walk" @JamesMarstersOf

[purpurle-iris]

Being a writer is so inconvenient at times, because why does my brain drop a perfect piece of dialogue/exposition/world building explaination right as I'm about to brush my teeth?

Now I have to go rush to my phone and write it down before it's lost forever in the realm of forgotten thoughts 

Like? I wanted to brush my teeth...

[fallintomidnight]

My friends, being normal human beings: "Hey I have a theory!!"

Me, having Buffy brainrot: "I HAVE A THEORY! IT'S A DEMON! DANCING DEMON..? NO SOMETHING ISN'T RIGHT THERE..."

[correctopinionhaver]

[norseshadows84]

Well, now that I actually have a plot for my Month of Murphy entry, I just have to write it lol. I'll figure that one out, probably a lot easier than figuring out the damn plot in the first place. However a new complication has entered the chat and I have pink eye in both eyes. This means no wearing contacts for the duration of the antibiotic drops, but I thankfully still have my old glasses. They're just really old as far as the Rx goes, but they still work. My birthday is also in little over a week and I don't know how to feel about that. I will officially be one year younger than Anthony Head was when he started playing Giles lol My husband has to work on my actual birthday so we're doing stuff the day before. He asked me what I wanted to do and I honestly have no idea lol. Most of my IRL friends are too busy to hang out with me and only once did my husband manage to get a couple of them together for a birthday dinner for me. I wrote down the Cangel and Spuffy fic ideas so I'll probably have those done at some point, too. I'm just happy that it seems like my creativity has started to claw its way back from the abyss. :)

[windenloop]

hundred plus years, and there’s only one thing i’ve ever been sure of, you. 

when I say i love you it’s not because i want you, or i can’t have you. there’s nothing to do with me; i love what you are, what you do, how you try. i’ve seen your kindness, and your strength. i’ve seen the best and the worst of you, and i understand with perfect clarity exactly what you are. you’re hell of a woman, you’re the one, Buffy. 

[norseshadows84]

Well HOLY SHIT guess who finally had some fucking inspiration strike lol I finally got some ideas for my final Month of Murphy entry, thank fuck lol. I also have a wee little Cangel one shot bouncing around in my brain and some gratuitous Spuffy smut as well. Night time is really just a much better time for me when it comes to being creative, apparently. I think not forcing myself to try and brainstorm is what did it. I was just doing other shit lol.

[norseshadows84]

I want to write. I have no ideas. Me: I really would love to create. My brain: no. Me: ... why? Can't I just... have an idea pop into my head and write? My brain: NO! No write! Only think of writing. Me: but... why? My brain: NO WRITE ONLY THINK Fuck executive dysfunction, seriously. It's been like three weeks and my brain is the Sahara freaking desert for ideas. Anything that does come to mind just sucks ass. I wish I could reboot my brain or shake it like one of those magic 8 balls and have it start working properly again. I have been chasing easy dopamine HARD lately, too, I've noticed, most likely in response to stressful events in my own life, but still, it would be nice if my brain could give me something to write to take my mind off said stress, yeah? I haven't even felt a desire to finish some sketches I'd started in June. Going to have more coffee and maybe put on some background show and color my coloring book of shadows planner, see if that might help get my mind more into creative mode or something. It's been storming off and on all day and visibility was so bad on the way to the gym I had to bail and go back home. Boo. Same for yesterday and it looks like tomorrow, too. LAME. I wish I knew how to get my creativity back. I miss it. I have a ton of Spuffy and Cangel ideas, but no drive and I have zero Harry/Murphy ideas and no ability to think of any ideas as of yet. I need to find my guitar tuner because it's MIA and I always feel happy when I play, even if I can't actually play any songs, just running through the chords I know makes me feel happy and focused. Here's to hoping a sudden burst of inspiration will hit me at some point lol.

[tomb-mold]

the problem is i really do love staying up until one billion o'clock. it just cant be helped

[mcgear]

Buffy Summers x The Thing Is by Ellen Bass

[prophetic-writer]

To all my writers living in areas going through heat waves right now:

1. Drink some water, please

2. Remember that even if you aren’t out in the heat that it can still make you tired and make it harder to think coherently. Go easy on yourself.

3. DRINK SOME GODDAMN WATER!!!!!!!!!!

[deathgasmic]

who else is up permanently feeling like they did something Wrong

[phantomrose96]

Dealing with burnout is sooooooooooooooo easy all you need to do is operate at 40% indefinitely and be kind of mad at yourself the whole time.

[girlyprincesspop]

ugh the only couple to exist to me

#

[vivianleighwishesshewasme]

One of my favorite lines

[figofswords]

i miss my beautiful wife joann fabrics it feels as if eons have passed since i last saw her. this guy michael keeps waving her visage in front of me and saying she’s living in his house but he is lying to me. i know this because i went into his house and found only fragments and memories of my beautiful wife joann and pictures of her shadowed face labeled “online only”. michael won’t even let me order swatches from him

[norseshadows84]

it's the 21st and I still have NO ideas for my Month of Murphy entry and it is driving me up the fucking wall! I hate my brain sometimes. I don't think it's depression... just... executive dysfunction. Lots of it. I haven't created anything, nor felt the desire to, but I've also... wanted to. My brain just doesn't make any goddamn sense sometimes. Back to brainstorming with extra coffee lol