I think I used to have a voice

Unable to Breathe | Richie & Barry

notevilmaybe‌:

The words seemed muffled, but he worked to redirect his focus on them. It wasn’t trite suggestions, things that were supposed to work but took more than offering once to grab hold, it was real words. Sentences that required focus, and it was something that wasn’t soaked in cordite and copper, so he worked to draft his attention towards it. Breathe in. Hold. Breathe out. Wait. Breathe in. Hold. Breathe out. Listen to the words, and the rhythmic circles against his back helped too. A pattern to match, something to ground in, and eventually his breathing evened out to something closer in time. Still hitched in places, it wasn’t perfect, but it was progress.

“Freefall’s hard to beat.”

Richie took a chance, putting his hand back on Barry’s shoulder. This seemed to be working. Whether Barry remembered anything Richie was telling him or not, it seemed to be a story Barry could concentrate on, a distraction from whatever memories or issues that caused this in the first place.

“If you can picture that… Standing at the top of that cliff on a summer day in our fucking underoos. I was terrified I’d loose my glasses. I’d only just gotten them. You told me to put them in my shoe and leave them there. You would make sure nothing happened to me if I jumped. You held my hand. You told me you would see for the both of us and that I didn’t really need to see much down there to have fun anyway. I still didn’t want to. And then you said if I trusted you, then I would jump. So we jumped. And man, that water was fucking cold. But I realized I couldn’t see how far down it was without my glasses. It wasn’t as scary. I just had to trust you.”

The laugh was hard to force out, more a rough huff of breath than a true laugh, but he tried. It wasn’t a story he really remembered, but it was nice anyway. Something he wanted to remember, something that wasn’t the absolute shit that comprised most of his memories.

“Sounds nice. Fun. I mean, I don’t really have much of an imagination, but that was good. I don’t remember that, but. I wish I did.”

“Hey, you’re sounding better.” Richie squeezed Barry’s shoulder, but kept his touching to a minimum. “I mean we got in fucking trouble anyway. We didn’t think about drying off before coming home and Janet ratted on us immediately. That’s big sisters for you. Also we left our undies to dry on the deck outside and mom said she’d die of embarrassment if we ever did that again.”

#trashmouthrecords #v; second chances #blaaaaah sorry for the delayyyyy

He leaned into the contact, absorbing the pressure of it, further grounding himself in it.

"Yeah that sounds about right," he commented dryly, smiling faintly. A beat, hesitant, then: "What...what's our mom like?"

mcnyhearts

continued with @notevilmaybe !!!

LYNN SAID SHE WOULD BE GONE FOR A FEW HOURS … it was actually a pretty simple day, she made sure of it. she wanted to be home for the next week, a little time to relax. but she had to venture out to pick up a new script and have a short meeting with the director about upcoming filming and things he really wanted her to focus on. he was brief, to the point, she appreciated that. it meant she could get home to where barry was waiting and they could start the week of no work and being together. she had to admit she was excited and happy to be able to spend that much time with him and not have to worry about work.

when she arrived home and called out, she was surprised to not hear anything back or not have him come out from where ever he was. barry was quite, but usually he made himself known to her. “ barry? ” this time she walked, her heels clicking on the hardwood floor as she slipped her jacket off and started up the stairs. her dress was a beautiful green that made her eyes pop, tight in all the right places and showed the perfect amount of breast. did she love it? yes. was she excited to get out of it and put some yoga pants on? hell yes.

she walked into her room to something that took her by surprise though. the sound of moaning, voices she didn’t recognize, and the sight of her boyfriend in bed and flailing to get the covers over him. he had been a little to late though, and it was hard to hide.

THERE WAS AN OBVIOUS TENT COMING FROM HER SHEETS … guess she had been taking to long and he found other ways to entertain himself. “ were you watching porn… on my laptop? ” lynn bit down on her lip, clearing her throat to avoid a laugh coming up. she was trying to act serious but was having a hard time. a hand came up, hiding pump lips behind them and a bit of a smile. her brow quirked, “ didn’t know you were a porn guy. ”

#blaaaaah sorry for the delayyyyy #nsfw #derryleft

"Fuck. Fuck. Sorry," he mumbles, avoiding her gaze, face red at getting caught, because it's not like it wasn't obvious and there's no alternate explanation. He half expected the discovery would be a boner killer, but it throbs in neglect instead, and he squirms under the covers momentarily before trying to quash it, striking the offending flesh with the base of his palm a few times.

"Your. Your laptop's fine, you didn't catch a virus or anything."

mcnyhearts

continued with @notevilmaybe.

LYNN LISTENED, SHE ALWAYS DID … since she was small she was always the type to listen and watch the world around her. she was so in tuned with people, both living and dead, that it was easy for her to tell when someone was good or not. ( even evil, she could tell when someone was that as well. ) lynn could see the dead around her, something she never told a soul about. when a person killed another, it was possible for the spirit to linger to them… cling to them. she always saw that. she could see a group of angry spirits around a person, she could see they did bad things, she could stay away.

lynn never saw that with barry though.

she didn’t want to. she wanted to see him as a normal person would. a handsome man, a quite man, a lonely man. it wasn’t until he took those shots that she could see all of him. that lynn could see the dead that clung to him and followed him. he had no idea did he… how many followed him. some were bad people, she could tell that much. but some weren’t, some were sad souls trying to understand. that, broke her heart. because she now knows barry would never of killed them if he knew they didn’t deserve it.

“ THAT’S TIP TOEING AROUND MY QUESTION ” … lynn said truthfully, bright blue eyes watching him carefully. her hand gripped his face, not in a violent or harmful way no. she was scared, she didn’t want to let go. but she would, if it was best for both of them. “ i can see the past you try so hard to hide barry… it follows you around more clearly than you think. you can’t run from it, you can’t run from the things you’ve done. but you can’t run from me either. ” one hand stayed on his face, the other moving down to ball up against his chest and take a secure hold of his shirt. “ but i will forgive it all, i will accept it all… every bit of your past, every ghost that follows you around… all of it… if i know that i am with a man who loves me. a man who will accept my pasts and my less than desirable traits. ” lynn fought back against tears, but she could feel them resting on lids. “ a man who will work to be better, and will put down his gun. ”

#blaaaaah sorry for the delayyyyy #derryleft

Her words choke him, catch his breath in his chest, twist his guts, stall his words in his throat. She knows, and the thought of it pulls at instinct, hairtrigger reaction that's only ever added to the body count strewn behind him. He'd told her, more or less, what he did anyway, and for a moment he's afraid, panic mixed with training, and it's a Herculean effort to stuff it down. To fight the lessons ingrained, that scream that he has to stop her. Eliminate her before she fucks him over, intentionally or not. Hands twitch at his sides before he balls his fists.

But she wants to look past it. Promises to accept and forgive, to keep it between them, if he confesses. If he promises to be Better, and he wants that so badly it hurts.

So he nods. Silent because he can't force the words out at first, but nods, eventually getting them out thickly.

"I do. I will. I promise."

@richiebeepbeeptozier

“YOU ARE A DICK. Also I’m at your door, let me in.”

Barry groaned at the shouting on the other side of the door, but obligingly got up from his spot set up in front of the TV after pausing the game so he wouldn’t accidentally get himself killed while he went to deal with…whatever the hell Richie’s problem was. He opened the door to regard him calmly, one eyebrow raised in a silent question before the words followed.

“Stop fucking shouting, I have neighbors. C’mon in. What did I do?”

Richie leaned against the door jam brows lifting nearly into his hairline. “Well, I mean first off you didn’t answer the fuckin ten texts I sent, and second off all what the fuck are you even doing in there spanking it? Is that what took you so long to answer the door?” Brushing past Barry he looked around with a grimace. “Jesus BarBar your place looks like shit.” He glanced over his shoulder at the other man. “Actually so do you. What the fuck?”

…oh. So that’s what the buzzing was. Yeah, stood to reason. He glanced over towards where his phone sat, abandoned on the nightstand, then back towards Richie when he pushed past and proceeded to critique everything, and huffed in answer. Too many questions all at once, per usual, and like usual he wasn’t actually sure which ones really merited responses.

“I was playing Call of Duty,” he offered, torn between the impulse to tidy up and the urge to tell him to fuck himself, but instead only huffed again, this one more discomfited.

“What. It’s fine.” Clean, at least, mostly.

bonesdollsgaysandtheys

“Yeeeah, ok Ill be sure to tell that to now sentient tribe of dust and unmentionables that are gonna emerge from under your bed any second and take us fuckin hostage.” he drawled and flopped down into the spot formerly occupied by Barry. “So seriously Care Bar where the fuck have you been? I was starting to think I was gonna have to start driving around and checking alley ways and dumpsters for your body.”

Dark eyes flicked over the other man’s face silently for a moment before he scoffed softly. “Here.” he fished out a small wrapped parcel from the inner pocket of his jacket. “Got that dumb shitty sandwich you like from that sketchy as fuck deli on 32nd.”

“I’ve been busy. Work.”

It was a shitty answer, didn’t account for the whole of it, but he couldn’t really tell him the whole of it, it wasn’t exactly something he could talk about. Wasn’t safe to talk about that shit with him. With most people.

But the sandwich came out, and it was a good distraction. Something safe.

“Sweet. You get anything for you, or did you just opt for the weird sandwich-in-your-pocket trick?”

“Well that’s a bullshit excuse.” Richie snorted and took up the abandoned controller tagging in and immediately dying. “Fuck.” He restarted the current mission, scrolling through the customization options. “Hey whatever the fuck works. Besides unlike shady hard to reach assholes I actually eat like a normal person. Which means I actually you know…eat.” He took out a player and crowed. “Boom motherfucker!” Glancing over at Barry again he frowned. “Seriously though man, what the fuck is going on. You’re even vaguer and less available than usual. And that’s fucking saying something.”

#blaaaaah sorry for the delayyyyy #richiebeepbeeptozier

"Hey, I was playing that. You're gonna ruin my stats." Like it actually mattered. But he took the sandwich to the chipped table, settling down to pointedly eat it. "I eat." Fuches makes sure he eats. Generally.

"You're here. I'm available enough, you have my number."

rpmemesnstuff

ᴘʜᴏᴇʙᴇ ʙʀɪᴅɢᴇʀꜱ ꜱᴛᴀʀᴛᴇʀ ꜱᴇɴᴛᴇɴᴄᴇꜱ

starter sentences using various lyrics from pheobe bridgers songs

‘ you must have been looking for me ‘ ‘ you put salt in the wound. ‘ ‘ i am tired of being sad. ‘ ‘ i feel it when i wake up, and it just stays bad. ‘ ’ you’re a brother to me, you’re my partner in crime. ‘ ’ you’re the feeling i get when i’m fine. ‘ ’ part of me wants you, but most of me needs you. ‘ ’ i won’t fall unless you ask me to. ‘ ‘ i want to live at the holiday in where somebody else makes the bed ‘ ‘ all of our problems, i’m gonna solve them. ‘ ‘ speeding cuz fuck the cops. ‘ ‘ i hate you for what you did, and i miss you like a little kid. ‘ ‘ i hardly feel anything at all. ‘ ‘ i have emotional motion sickness. ‘ ‘ somebody roll the windows down. ‘ ‘ there are no words in the english language, that i could scream to drown you out. ‘ ‘ i will try to drown you out. ‘ ‘ i guess it’s too late to change it now. ‘ ‘ when i think too much about it i can’t breathe. ‘ ‘ i don’t believe in that stuff anymore. ‘ ‘ jesus christ, i’m so blue all the time. ‘ ‘ last night i blacked out in my car. ‘ ‘ it’s four a.m., and i’m doing nothing again. ‘ ‘ i can’t sleep and i miss your face. ‘ ‘ i don’t wanna be alone anymore. ‘ ‘ i’ve got a good feeling, it doesn’t happen very often. ‘ ‘ it’s a shower beer. ‘ ‘ do you feel ashamed? ‘ ‘ do you feel ashamed when you hear my name? ‘ ‘ that makes me feel old. ‘ ‘ don’t be a stranger. ‘ ‘ can the killer in me tame the fire in you? ‘ ‘ is there anything left to do for us? ‘ ‘ i am sick of the chase. ‘ ‘ nothing ever comes if you want it. ‘ ‘ relying on the kindness of strangers that you will be forgiven. ‘ ‘ will you hate me? ‘ ‘ would you fuck this and let us fall? ‘ ‘ no it’s not important, they’re just pretty words. ‘ ‘ i’m amazed that you’re alright. ‘ ‘ he’s half the man and you’re twice as tall. ‘ ‘ next time i’ll see you, you’ll show me a hundred different ways to say the same thing. ‘ ‘ you missed my heart. ‘

Unable to Breathe | Richie & Barry

notevilmaybe‌:

The words seemed muffled, but he worked to redirect his focus on them. It wasn’t trite suggestions, things that were supposed to work but took more than offering once to grab hold, it was real words. Sentences that required focus, and it was something that wasn’t soaked in cordite and copper, so he worked to draft his attention towards it. Breathe in. Hold. Breathe out. Wait. Breathe in. Hold. Breathe out. Listen to the words, and the rhythmic circles against his back helped too. A pattern to match, something to ground in, and eventually his breathing evened out to something closer in time. Still hitched in places, it wasn’t perfect, but it was progress.

“Freefall’s hard to beat.”

Richie took a chance, putting his hand back on Barry’s shoulder. This seemed to be working. Whether Barry remembered anything Richie was telling him or not, it seemed to be a story Barry could concentrate on, a distraction from whatever memories or issues that caused this in the first place.

“If you can picture that… Standing at the top of that cliff on a summer day in our fucking underoos. I was terrified I’d loose my glasses. I’d only just gotten them. You told me to put them in my shoe and leave them there. You would make sure nothing happened to me if I jumped. You held my hand. You told me you would see for the both of us and that I didn’t really need to see much down there to have fun anyway. I still didn’t want to. And then you said if I trusted you, then I would jump. So we jumped. And man, that water was fucking cold. But I realized I couldn’t see how far down it was without my glasses. It wasn’t as scary. I just had to trust you.”

#trashmouthrecords #v; second chances

The laugh was hard to force out, more a rough huff of breath than a true laugh, but he tried. It wasn’t a story he really remembered, but it was nice anyway. Something he wanted to remember, something that wasn’t the absolute shit that comprised most of his memories.

“Sounds nice. Fun. I mean, I don’t really have much of an imagination, but that was good. I don’t remember that, but. I wish I did.”

rp-memes-atyourservice

Smut Starters & Symbols

TW: explicit sexual content, some slight humiliation. Feel free to change wording, pronouns, genitalia, etc, to better fit your muse.

Send one of the following SENTENCES for my muse’s reaction:

“You’re so pretty like this.” “You’re beautiful when you’re all flushed and wanting.” “Do you want me to take you like this?” “Easy, I don’t want to hurt you.” “Slow down, slow down.” “You can be rough with me, I won’t break.” “I want to suck you off.” “I want to eat you out.” “Did you touch yourself, thinking of me?” “Please, please, touch me.” “I want to bury my face between your thighs.” “I want to touch you all night.” “Please. Please, I’ll beg, I’ll do anything you want.” “You can beg better than that, I think.” “Harder, harder–” “Fuck me until I can’t think.” “I want you to bend me over and fuck me.” “Would you let me take you here? Where anyone might see?” “I don’t usually do this - but for you, anything.” “You have such beautiful thighs.” “Be patient, I’m not going to fuck you dry, no matter how much you beg.” “Beg me for it.” “You were made for this, weren’t you?” “I think you’d stay on your knees all night if I’d let you.” “Ride me. Slowly, that’s it.” “Don’t you dare come until I give you permission.” “Ah-ah. Don’t touch me.” “Touch yourself, go on.” “I want to make you feel good.” “I love it when you moan for me.” “Come on, darling, come for me.” “Come on my fingers, that’s it.” “God, your mouth, please–” “I need you, I need your (mouth/cock/pussy/ass/fingers)–” “Shh, do you want someone to walk in on us with your cock in me?” “I’ll let you have me any way you want.” “I’ve wanted to fuck you all night.” “You’re so fucking tight.” “You feel so good.” “Kiss me, I want–please–” “Oh, fuck, I’m gonna come–!” “Please let me come.” “I think I could go again, if you wanted.”

Send one of the following PROMPTS for my muse’s reaction:

[tug] - to pull my muse’s head back by the hair [throat] - to grip my muse gently but firmly by the throat [chin] - to tilt my muse’s chin up to make them look at your muse [kneel] - to kneel in front of my muse [wall] - to pin my muse to a wall [wrists] - to hold my muse down by the wrists [flip] - to flip my muse onto their stomach and hold them down [drag] - to drag my muse into yours’ lap [palm] - to rub a palm against my muse’s clothed groin [rut] - to push a knee between my muse’s thighs, against their groin [mouth] - to mouth at my muse’s groin through their pants or underwear [taste] - to have my muse taste themselves on your muse’s fingers [tongue] - to kiss my muse with tongue [thighs] - to kiss and suck at my muse’s inner thighs [lick] - to go down on my muse [finger] - to finger my muse [breasts] - to fondle my muse’s breasts [booty] - to fondle my muse’s ass [spank] - to spank my muse [restrain] - to tie my muse’s hands to prevent them from moving them [vibrator] - to use a vibrator on my muse [penetrate] - to fuck my muse with a cock, dildo or strap

[pants] - to make my muse come in their pants [facial] - to come on my muse’s face [inside] - to come inside my muse [risky] - to make my muse come where there’s a risk of being heard/discovered [early] - to make my muse come earlier than expected [edge] - to edge my muse/deny them orgasm [beg] - to beg my muse to let yours come

Add ‘reverse’ to any prompt for my muse to perform the action on yours instead! Alternatively, feel free to make up your own prompt even if it’s not on the list!

musingmemes

friends with benefits starters

“hey –– we said no strings attached.”

“don’t go falling in love with me.”

“i don’t want to mess up what we have.”

“you’re a good fuck. that’s it.”

“don’t you think you’ll ever want something more?”

“i think this was a mistake.”

“you said you didn’t have feelings for me..”

“i think we should just have sex.”

“relationships aren’t my thing, but you are.”

“how much longer are we gonna go without telling anyone?”

“my friends asked me why you’ve been commenting on my pictures.”

“are you keeping me a secret?”

“how many other people are you sleeping with?”

“tell me how you actually feel for once.’

“do you see this going any further?”

@richiebeepbeeptozier

“YOU ARE A DICK. Also I’m at your door, let me in.”

Barry groaned at the shouting on the other side of the door, but obligingly got up from his spot set up in front of the TV after pausing the game so he wouldn’t accidentally get himself killed while he went to deal with…whatever the hell Richie’s problem was. He opened the door to regard him calmly, one eyebrow raised in a silent question before the words followed.

“Stop fucking shouting, I have neighbors. C’mon in. What did I do?”

Richie leaned against the door jam brows lifting nearly into his hairline. “Well, I mean first off you didn’t answer the fuckin ten texts I sent, and second off all what the fuck are you even doing in there spanking it? Is that what took you so long to answer the door?” Brushing past Barry he looked around with a grimace. “Jesus BarBar your place looks like shit.” He glanced over his shoulder at the other man. “Actually so do you. What the fuck?”

…oh. So that’s what the buzzing was. Yeah, stood to reason. He glanced over towards where his phone sat, abandoned on the nightstand, then back towards Richie when he pushed past and proceeded to critique everything, and huffed in answer. Too many questions all at once, per usual, and like usual he wasn’t actually sure which ones really merited responses.

“I was playing Call of Duty,” he offered, torn between the impulse to tidy up and the urge to tell him to fuck himself, but instead only huffed again, this one more discomfited.

“What. It’s fine.” Clean, at least, mostly.

bonesdollsgaysandtheys

“Yeeeah, ok Ill be sure to tell that to now sentient tribe of dust and unmentionables that are gonna emerge from under your bed any second and take us fuckin hostage.” he drawled and flopped down into the spot formerly occupied by Barry. “So seriously Care Bar where the fuck have you been? I was starting to think I was gonna have to start driving around and checking alley ways and dumpsters for your body.”

Dark eyes flicked over the other man’s face silently for a moment before he scoffed softly. “Here.” he fished out a small wrapped parcel from the inner pocket of his jacket. “Got that dumb shitty sandwich you like from that sketchy as fuck deli on 32nd.”

#richiebeepbeeptozier #v; TBA

“I’ve been busy. Work.”

It was a shitty answer, didn’t account for the whole of it, but he couldn’t really tell him the whole of it, it wasn’t exactly something he could talk about. Wasn’t safe to talk about that shit with him. With most people.

But the sandwich came out, and it was a good distraction. Something safe.

“Sweet. You get anything for you, or did you just opt for the weird sandwich-in-your-pocket trick?”

[rut]

He’s not sure when things crossed over. One minute it was just a normal conversation, the next she just kept moving closer and closer, and then her lips were on his and he froze, at first. So many years since they were kids, and he wasn’t even sure he was the same person anymore, but she was there, and warm, and soft in all the right ways and he absolutely didn’t deserve it but then she was in his lap and her knee was between his legs, pressing, and everything just kind of dissolved after that.

“H-hi,” he mumbles, trying to keep up and mostly just feeling extremely out of his depth.

#thatfirehairedshifter #IT-verse I guess???#asks answered

@richiebeepbeeptozier

“YOU ARE A DICK. Also I’m at your door, let me in.”

Barry groaned at the shouting on the other side of the door, but obligingly got up from his spot set up in front of the TV after pausing the game so he wouldn’t accidentally get himself killed while he went to deal with…whatever the hell Richie’s problem was. He opened the door to regard him calmly, one eyebrow raised in a silent question before the words followed.

“Stop fucking shouting, I have neighbors. C’mon in. What did I do?”

Richie leaned against the door jam brows lifting nearly into his hairline. “Well, I mean first off you didn’t answer the fuckin ten texts I sent, and second off all what the fuck are you even doing in there spanking it? Is that what took you so long to answer the door?” Brushing past Barry he looked around with a grimace. “Jesus BarBar your place looks like shit.” He glanced over his shoulder at the other man. “Actually so do you. What the fuck?”