❛ It hurts. More than dying ever did. There are days when I feel like I deserve this. ❜
A DARKER SHADE OF MAGIC / A GATHERING OF SHADOWS // accepting! | @unmeiha
SUFFUSED WITH LIGHT SHE WAS MADE SACROSANCT, her blood turning white as it dripped holy ‘pon the filaments of the world ; a testament to the arrogance of those who thought they could turn the tide on a broken, fractured world ; a cruel end to the creature shepherded by malevolent gods to the consecrated slaughterhouse. He saw the refraction of opalite crystals forming in ivory horns, the way her hair dyed silvery in the light and how her teeth grit in tension of her smile, desperate she was not to let her despair usher in the truth like a hangman’s bell.
THE WARRIOR OF DARKNESS AKIN TO A CAT and, like the cat, she had many times to die. The next was always worse than the first: a narrow escape from a primal’s claws or the millimetre miss of a blade. T’was enough to make one feel almost invincible, and yet the reaper was always a distant friend ; his cold hand a comfort when the weight of the world seemed too much to bear. When had her hand reached for bone? Why now did he seek to claim her for corrupt sainthood?
“ WE DESERVE TO BE A GOD’S PLAYTHINGS? “ Ardbert laughed but the humour was cold, his expression stony as illuminated hands sought to comfort that which he could barely touch. He would have believed her once — the wayward lamb of Hydaelyn, corrupt by the Ascians to usher in the wave of light — he deserved not a peaceful death, and purgatory was amplified in watching those self-same innocent souls baptised in sanctified corruption. He was their leader, thus he was the one who sent them to die.
“ LOOK AT ME, KOHARU. ” His voice was an order that brokered no argument, even if the tap he gave to her chin passed through the skin upon contact. It was enough Ardbert to recoil, if only for a moment, but he stood resolute in his convictions — in the faith she instilled in him when all had seemed lost. “ Of course it hurts ; it fucking hurts. We didn’t ask for this — this martyrdom. Do you think I of all people don’t know?”
THE HAND HE FORMED INTO A FIST loosened slowly. Though condescension had once come easily in lieu of influenced hatreds, it was not what she needed ; nor was his own touch a comfort to his spectral state. “ But it was you who helped open my eyes to the reality of our plight — to realise we have little choice in the matter. We are insignificant to the gods and thrall who would seek to do their bidding. But should that be all to which we aspire too? Do you really wish to lay down and submit like this ? “ IT WOULD BE SO EASY TO GIVE UP. Close your eyes, give in to the burning light and be forgiven in the grace of the purified. It was how Ardbert had drifted for nearly a century, cradled in the bosom of his sanctification. But not anymore. “ I know you’re stronger than this — I take you for a woman stronger than this. We will face it together ; I will be by your side — ”
THERE WAS A PAUSE. A LICK OF THE LIP. Though Ardbert hesitated, he spoke true all the same. “And I will stay with you until the end, I promise. ”