The-Masterless

[backonmybullsht]

Adorable moments between Noah Wyle and Eriq La Salle

Best bromance on and off screen 💖👯‍♂️

TikTok

[human--rivalry]

I think Shane is always low-grade exhausted because it’s actually a lot to manage being constantly physically active and pushing yourself and also having to manage your neurodivergent brain which by default uses more energy than the average person for basic tasks. So when he retires he suddenly has a bunch of energy and actually feels better than he has in a long time

[runawaymarbles]

I always feel so cheated in stories when characters are walking around with this Big Guilt and then...you find out that the thing wasn't their fault at all. And not in a "they thought they did it but it turns out they were set up" way, or even a "accepting that just because they did A which caused B which caused C it doesn't mean C was their fault", way but where they finally lay out the sequence of events and it's clear that any thinking person would not connect them. Like, fucking commit!!! The character isn't LESS compelling if they actually did the thing! You can't have the haunted brooding meow meow who is...also completely blameless

[runawaymarbles]

Ok listen

[larkral]

Y'all okay, maybe I'm a little bit annoyed that this person came up with a clever gambit to get past The Lego Heated Rivalry Ban before I did, but I will be even more irate if we don't get this thing over the finish line.

Just go make an account and support The Lego Cottage project, okay?

It's free and only takes a minute! Please!!!

[leneybeany]

Relationship Reveal Hollanov Fics!

Completed Ongoing

Make sure to leave kudos under fics you enjoy and like and repost this so more can see!!

stay tuned for more additions and follow for more fic rec lists!

Three Drink Shane by bluesylady

Lily Wants To Be A WAG by harmonyminhyung

Ilya Rozanov is Now Live by Itsallfine

Jane Is One Of The Girls by harmonyminhyung

Shane Hollander, Pro Level Cowboy by Itsallfine

Not since, always by Prgloon

Operation Get Roz a SAP by dntat for Lanabean

being mature and responsible by its_kindness_infinite

Breaking News by PlatitudinalTeen

Much better (as you like it) by No_good_deed

Cap has a girlfriend? by harmonyminhyung

Sneaking Suspicion by harmonyminhyung

Big, Boring Boxes by CinnamonProse

all eyes on me by gurlsrool

lover, come over by LArtemys

Say My Name by wolfsbanex

The Dowry (or How the Boston Raiders Made a Plan) by BigPlushShark

#getLilyout by viridescented

Fanning the Flames by cjr2

there is by anincompletelist (soldouthaz)

The Chaos Theorem (or: Shane Hollander needs a nap and a therapist. He got Ilya instead) by Goffi_3197

confess my love by FaiaSakura

Forgotten Language by manyfandomsmember

маскировка by ghosttotheparty

the support group by goldengalaxies

from the outside by goldengalaxies

Don't Text While High Folks by RANDC117

ways they didn't find out by goldengalaxies

hold you as the water rushes in by justhockey

Three Drink Shane by bluesylady

That Time Hayden Pike Ruined Everything by leanybeany

Eye of the Storm by Lily_wing

Doesn't sound like a Lily by M_mariiii

Jane Adapts Nonnaturally Expeditiously by shanessed

Enemy Lines by winter_ninja

ilya + the real housewives of montreal by v_velour

Unhinged love by Madfordinos

The Echo In My Veins by leanybeany

[lexicanons]

Ilya’s doctor warns him that antidepressants often decrease sex drive but after eight weeks of taking the meds, the opposite has happened. His sex drive has dramatically increased. He’s horny all the time, and he’s constantly thinking about fucking Shane. It’s pretty much the only thing he thinks about. It’s the off-season, and they’re at the cottage, so he has mostly uninterrupted access to Shane and can fuck him around the clock, but he knows he can’t go on like this. They were having dinner with Yuna and David the other night and he almost bent Shane over the dining room table while his in-laws where in the kitchen. Ilya was horrified when he got hard from Shane placing a piece of garlic bread on his plate, and had to lie about being too full to move from the table so he had time to will his erection away before his in-laws saw it. He has to figure this out before the season starts or he might bend Shane over and fuck him in front of everyone in the locker room. He goes back to the doctor and tells them his symptoms, and they switch him to another medicine. Ilya tells Shane about the medication switch and he swears he sees a brief flash of disappointment on Shane’s face.

[hollanovarchive]

Hey I read a fic where Yuna thinks her son might be asexual but then finds out about Ilya. I believe it's a one shot. I can't find it :(

Thanks in advance! (also thank you for having this tumblr I have been reading through the recs. Have you read Jane & Lily but Amee19? I love that texting fic!)

Hiiii ! I am having trouble finding your fic. The closest I could come up with is listed below, but it doesn't have anything about "asexuality" so I don't think it's it. I am hoping that my lovely followers are able to help you out?

The Elevator

Yuna wakes up the night after Shane and Ilya came out to them

Love, Full of Hope

5 times Yuna loves Ilya, and one time she tells Shane why

i only think in the form of crunching numbers

Yuna and David just mean to surprise their son before the season starts. Except Shane isn’t home alone – and his unexpected visitor turns out to have a problem that is right up Yuna’s alley. What would they have done without her? Probably something stupid, like pretended to get married.

Does anybody else find this fic familiar?

Also, I just read the Jane&Lily series! Added it to my rec list for texting (: Thanks for the rec!!

UPDATE: A lovely follower suggested this one:

Yuna Hollander Almost Gets It Right

Yuna Hollander knows her son is different, but she winds up being slightly off the mark about how, and comes to regret that very much

[sassycolortheorist101-blog]

some fucking resources for all ur writing fuckin needs

* body language masterlist

* a translator that doesn’t eat ass like google translate does

* a reverse dictionary for when ur brain freezes

* 550 words to say instead of fuckin said

* 638 character traits for when ur brain freezes again

* some more body language help

(hope this helps some ppl)

[raginghomosexual4ever]

THANK YOU

[rozy-babey81]

I definitely think that Shane's gay awakening had a lot to do with the hockey stars that he grew up watching but also - hear me out....

I have a hc that Shane was at a friend's house sometime in his early teens when he saw his first UFC fight night. And when he saw a dude get put into full guard, his face got all hot and he was feeling things. And he started watching it sometimes at home and would be completely perplexed at why he was feeling this way. He decided that he must be turned on by violence or something?? But pretty soon there is no time for anything but hockey and he forgets about it.

Then years later Shane comes home to Ilya on the couch watching fights.

S: "I didn't know you liked MMA"

I: "yes, unlike you, I enjoy sports other than hockey"

S: "I like other sports! I used to watch UFC all the time!"

They watch together for a minute then suddenly there's a guy bent in half with his knees up by his ears and Shane is having flashbacks. He remembers being 14, sitting on his friend's couch with a half chub, confused as hell and then - it clicks.

S: "oh my god"

And Ilya will probably never let him live it down, but yes they fuck about it.

[deja-b00]

somehow it comes up that troy had a crush on shane and was going to ask for his number. and after troy gets ribbed by his teammates and ilya makes a big scene, shane is like, “well i never would’ve gone out with you lol.”

and troy smiles, “right, because you were with roz the whole time.”

“i mean, yes, but also because you and dallas kent spent years calling me and jj ‘rush hour’ and asking hayden if his wife was his beard to cover up his big gay relationship with me.”

the rest of the centaurs blink. harris puts his head in his hands and groans.

and troy’s like, “oh. right. sorry about that :/“

[mayjuvac]

some amazing additions from the tags

[hollanovhaunting]

I need someone to write a fic where

1) Shane is moving to the Cens and it actually IS very awkward and the Cens are not lovely and wholesome right off the bat because

2) there is a widespread misunderstanding when Shane and Ilya get outed where the Cens, missing ALL of the context, are assuming that Shane must’ve been a shit partner with how rough Ilya was doing this past season and assume that Shane was *forcing* Ilya to stay closeted because he’s *ashamed* of Ilya and their relationship

3) Shane is actually pretty hurt by the Cens being cold and distant with him but doesn’t complain about it because literally everyone else ever has behaved like that towards him in his life except for Ilya, Rose, and the Pikes. He’s very much like “well well look who’s inside again” about it.

4) Ilya doesn’t realize the Cens are thinking Shane is BadTM because he’s wrapped up in how happy he is to have Shane around now. He actually does not realize any of this is happening until their first week of practice as a new team and he sees his team icing his husband out

5) Ilya tries to talk to Shane about it but Shane is very much like “don’t worry Ilya this is normal and I’m fine cause I have you” and it makes Ilya want to kill the Metros three times over

6) Shane also agrees with the Cens about himself being a shitty husband when he hears the reasoning behind their behavior. So he just decides to work hard at being a husband and a teammate and keep his head down.

7) Ilya doesn’t know what to do. Shane is adamant that he doesn’t want Ilya to confront the team and that he can’t control what others think about him and he doesn’t want it to be a big deal. But Ilya is also seeing Shane be as sad and withdrawn as he was last season and is actively getting worse- being more strict than ever about his diet, constantly working out and straining himself, being first on the ice and last to leave

8) some of the Cens slowly start realizing that they have Shane wrong over more time with him- mainly Luca, Troy, Harris, Wyatt, and Bood. But they have put walls up that they don’t know how to tear down without spooking Shane.

9) The rest of the team don’t realize how shitty this must be for Shane until the Cens go up against the Metros and they realize that they’ve been treating Shane the same way his old and terrible teams did- they watch as Shane takes scathing insults with a blank face, gets back up without a word after being smashed against the boards, gives a polite smile (the same smile he’s given them when they’re being passive aggressive) when receiving glares and threats from his ex teammates.

10) idk it can go many ways from here- Shane gets hurt and has to leave the ice and the teams finds him genuinely upset and they all have a confrontation- or the Metros target Ilya and the Cens see Shane lose his shit and how in love and protective he is- or the Cens stop icing him out after this and slowly start to actually get to know him and maybe apologize. Idk. The world is your oyster or whatever. I just want Protective Cens but it Backfires Pretty Badly.

11) Bonus points if Ilya eventually confronts them and then, when he hears their reasoning, is very much like “you??? Hurt my husband??? For me??? He wasn’t a bad partner??? I have depression??? Is chemical imbalance not abuse???????” And is absolutely pissed lmao

[prettyboyilyarozanov]

shane & ilya playing a dirty version of never have I ever with rose, svetlana, luca, wyatt, troy, bood, harris, and evan, and shane getting jealous as all hell when ilya has done pretty much everything

“never have i ever had a threesome.” ilya has done it. shane looks at him like “are you serious? with who?” and ilya shrugs like “two guys. two women. a guy and a woman. have done it all.”

“never have i ever fucked someone with their parents home.” ilya has done it. shane looking at him “since fucking when?” and ilya is like “when i was teenager in russia. do not worry about it.”

“never have i ever engaged in kinky sex.” ilya has done it. shane is getting more & more jealous by this point, looking at ilya like “you’re into that stuff?” and ilya shrugs like “yes. i like handcuffs and those things. is no big deal.”

“never have i ever been caught fucking someone.” ilya has done it. shane furrows his brows like “you never told me that.” and ilya is like “yes. was caught fucking girl by her father. no big deal.” and shane is like “no big deal?! how are you still alive?!”

“never have i ever had sex without protection.” ilya has done it. now shane is pissed, looking at ilya with the Death Glare™️. “what the fuck do you mean you’ve had sex without protection? do you realize how stupid that is? what if you got someone pregnant? what if you got a disease?” and ilya is like “girls were clean and on pill. I never fuck a man without condom, just you.”

shane isn’t happy, but he is happy that they decided not to drink for this one. ilya would be passed out by then if they had. because the man has done absolutely everything.

[yuqis-ifty]

Shane would always be very insecure about the fact that he feels that at a core level he really isn't nearly as good at reading Ilya the way Ilya is at reading Shane, and he has no place to put this insecurity, he doesn't know how to help it and it only grows in the first few months they are finally living together after being outed, because Shane feels like sometimes he can't even tell what type of day Ilya is having, whether he actually enjoys something they're doing together that Shane likes or not, whether he's getting more and more tired of Shane and the rules he sets about their home. He wants to believe that this is all just another thing his minds made up to scare him, because he knows Ilya is trying so hard and doing so well at communicating with him, that he genuinely savours all the time they spend together even if he doesn't have to anymore, and that he really likes to make Shane happy. But the feeling is unshakable, he knows how good Ilya is at masking his emotions, he knows he's pretending, and more than anything he's well aware of his inability to pick on certain things that people leave out for him. The memories of Ilya trying to imply how he wasn't happy going back to Russia and Shane not catching tre subject still haunts him, and he's just so upset with himself no matter how much he tries to rationalize this in his head.

And then there's Ilya, very much noticing that Shane is heavily upset and all Ilya can deduce is that its generally related to him in some way. He sees that every time he confides in Shane about having a bad day while they were out, which Shane obviously talks him through and goes through any and all of the things Galina, Ilya's therapist has recommended, Shane seems visibly distraught a couple hours later almost invariably. He wants to believe it's just Shane processing the fact that his husband has depression and is just worried about Ilya, in his own Shane Hollander way, but when it keeps happening Ilya, not matter how much he wants to can't stop himself from thinking that Shane's bothered by him, that he's burdened by having to constantly support a man who had seemed to be fine up till now. He sees the way Shane's starting to hesitate in telling him things sometimes, and it's breaking his heart but he physically can't bring himself to ask Shane about it. Can't bring himself to ask Shane about it only to risk getting his husband, the man he's been pining and waiting for for 13 years to tell him that he's a burden, just like everyone else he used to call family.

So, in all conventional hollanov fashion, this continues for an ungodly amount of time before Ilya says something under his breath about Shane not needing to help him and that he knows hes getting tired, Shane to interrogate him about this because how dare Ilya ever say that he wouldn't do something for the man he loves more than himself, and then proceeds to breakdown sobbing Ilya tells him what he thought had been happening, and how both of them had been spiralling over absolutely nothing.

They then fuck about it.

[liminalmess]

This post made me think about how Ilya is already such a rage baiter annoying pain in Shane’s ass and that would only get worse when they’re husbands and living together.

*Shane bends over to do anything ever* Ilya is either humping or slapping his ass

Shane: ILYA I AM TAKING A HOT DISH OUT OF THE OVEN IS THIS THE TIME TO SLAP MY ASS

He likes to pants him sometimes too to switch it up when he’s feeling especially evil and Shane has now resorted to wearing sweatpants with drawstrings TIED TIGHTLY

Also constant “what do you wanna eat for dinner” “you/your ass/come here and I’ll show you” ofc and its fun cousin “trying to figure out what to eat” “eat this dick i heard it’s part of a healthy macrobiotic diet”

[suraks-sweet-tits]

Rose makes a joke one time about how no one really loves sucking dick and Shane is so confused by that sentiment he just blue screens out

[deja-b00]

it’s their first season playing together and a video goes around of ilya calling shane sweetheart on the ice. it sparks a dumb controversy where people are calling them unprofessional and speculating that their teammates are uncomfortable having a couple on the team.

cut to their next game where the centaurs have assigned each of their players their own unhinged pet name. bood is big daddy. hayes: snookums. troy is doll face. luca is obviously baby boy.

when asked about it in a press conference, coach weibe is just like, "every player in hockey gets a nickname or two. the centaurs are just a little more creative than most teams. why, is it making people uncomfortable?"

[homoerotic-friction]

can't stop thinking abt shane getting an autism diagnosis and being scared to tell ilya and then the conversation going very similarly to when shane told ilya he was gay bc ilya is sitting there like

???? yes ??? this is not news ???? did you not know this ????