MayJuVac

. . . May (she/her) | in my 20s . . . fair warning - this blog is a mess of everything :)

[mayjuvac]

It's just me and my queued posts against the world

[whyenn-reader]

Not to go "if you have ADHD just go for a run" or anything, but I am so serious if you have ADHD you should regularly go outside, no headphones no phone no nothing and just stand and observe for a while until you've had enough. Not until you get bored, until you've had enough. Drink your coffee without watching tiktok. Have a bath without music. Turn down the volume in your headphones. I cannot overstate how much learning to be bored is cruicial with ADHD. Life is not just about pleasure, no matter what your dysregulated dopamine system thinks, and when you teach your brain to be okay with being bored, then boring tasks stop feeling like torture. By letting yourself be bored you are yoinking your system out of the high/low binary and allow for the highs to feel like actual highs and not just anything that isn't low. I am so serious go literally touch grass. Listen to the sounds in your flat. Stimulate your body the way it was designed. It lowers anxiety and makes you feel like you're real and best of all it's completely free

[butts-bouncing-on-the-beltway]

I really wish more ADHD mental health care told you WHY things like this matter to our quality of life.

The Hyperactivity in Attention-Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder is NOT about being physically hyperactive, it's about having a "hyperactive central nervous system" because it's a form of inheritable dysautonomia. The problem with disautonomia, especially the ADHD kind, is that it makes boredom flag to your nervous system as a THREAT, triggering hyperactive and maladaptive central nervous system processes like fight or flight.

But dysautonomia kills you that way. Literally, part of the reason our average life spand increase on stimulents is that it helps manage risk-taking impulsivity that can get us killed by accident, but the other part is that stimulents can regulate a hyperactive CNS such that it is functionally (while impacted by the stimulent) NOT dysregulated anymore. And PHYSIOLOGICALLY that is essential because the physical outcomes of dysautonomia can reduce your life span by YEARS if not decades through self-perpetuating hypervigelence, endocrine disruption, and adrenal fatigue.

So when the ADHD brain goes stimulation-seeking and a doctor tells you to practice mindfulness, it feels like being told "hey go stand in a functioning boiler until you can stop thinking" rather than WHAT IT IS which is the process of re-teaching your body what is and isn't safe.

Standing outside making mindful, non-interpretive/moralized observation of the world helps your brain and body re-acclimate to the idea that absence of that frantic "busy" feeling isn't a threat or a risk to your safety, and gradually reduces the level of distress that just hanging out somewhere triggers for you.

Learning WHY this stuff was being suggested and understanding what it was actually supposed to do went a long way towards changing my relationship with my ADHD. I am FAR more functional now, far less prone to shame spirals and rejection sensitivity, hell, I can **sit physically still for near on an hour at a time** now without feeling like I'm going to crawl out of my skin.

So yeah. Go outside. Let the world narrow around you and take deep breaths until it stops feeling claustrophobic or like you need to climb walls. Learn how to let little sensations become big ones like the way the heat of the sun on your skin starts as a gentle warming and be omes a unique collection of sensory moments depending on how it lands on you. Listen for sounds under sounds and let them fade in and out as you move your focus from one sound to the next. Enjoy. Move on. Rinse and repeat.

When you no longer feel like the world is actively killing you, it's a lot easier to navigate it.

[whyenn-reader]

S++ tier addition to the post, thank you tumblr user butts bouncing on the beltway

[greentrickster]

Daughter of fantasy villains decides to rebel against her parents by actually going through with her arranged marriage to a local golden retriever of a prince instead of running off with some local villain-to-be or conquering said golden retriever’s kingdom and ruling it solo like her parents expect her to. Plus, sue her, she’s into the clean-cut earnest look.

At the same time, local prince charming discovers that he’s actually very into the gothic fiance his parents have landed him with in order to try and establish peace with the local evil lair down the lane, he would never have guessed a spiderweb pattern could look so fetching on a ball gown…?

Meanwhile, two pairs of parents in a tizzy because they both expected their offspring to whole-heartedly reject this union and give them an excuse to conquer their goody-two-shoes/evil neighbours, they’re not supposed to actually like each other-!

[chucktaylorupset]

respective friend groups undergoing culture clash like all of prince charming’s knights are like what vile spell has been used to ensorcel our prince.  we must be on our guard for surely this is but a ruse for an assassination attempt

meanwhile the villain bride’s friends are all like clearly he loves you not, why do you persist in a manner that will ensure your own heart break, i mean if he was taking this seriously there would be at least three assassination attempts by now.  it’s like he doesn’t even notice that you have massive amounts of dark power to covet for his own

smashcut to

fully armored knight, clanging through the hallways in attempts at stealth, blades drawn: i’m just saying, i took an oath of protection.  this feels wrong.

prince charming: it’s not wrong, it’s celebrating cross cultural traditions for my beloved bride

knight: it’s attempted murder

prince charming: it’s a loving attempted murder

[greentrickster]

@chucktaylorupset  Meanwhile the bride has a bouquet of roses, cornflowers, and wheat sheaves on her desk in her room, and she’s not coming out until she’s written a beautiful and moving poem about how they favourably compare to her groom. It’s been three days. She’s gone through an entire raven’s worth of quills (unethically sourced). The ‘toads who used to be my friends’ list has gone up by one. But she’s bent dark forces and eldritch spirits to her will and, by the powers obscene, this will not be the thing that breaks her.

Sorceress friend: Please, just get him an amulet that will double his power at the cost of his soul, no one’s worth this.

Rebellious villainess: (nearly in tears) No, he brought his best knights to the castle and tried to kill me last week, at midnight, I can’t ignore something like that! He even kicked Cathulhu!

Sorceress friend: He nudged it with his foot. And then he apologized to it. In tears.

Rebellious villainess: (actually in tears now, for reasons of feels instead of poetic torment) He’s trying so hard!!!

[greentrickster]

Villainess: Beloathed, I need a goat.

Prince: Of course, darling - may I inquire as to what for?

Villainess: Blood sacrifice to the dark gods, you know how it is.

Prince: …

Prince: …darling, you know I support your lifestyle choices, but I must say this before it potentially happens.

Prince: I’m not all right with human sacrifice. That’s one of my boundaries. I don’t know if you do that or not, but it seemed a topical time to bring it up.

Villainess: (carefree laugh) Oh beloathed, don’t worry yourself about such things, I would never!

Villainess: (leading him off to the goat market) Only incompetents use actual humans. Skilled practitioners of the dark arts know that a goat is not only a sufficient sacrifice, but the superior one.

Prince: You don’t say? Fascinating!

[greentrickster]

@sapphire-monkey One of the nobles against the marriage in the prince’s kingdom invites the villainess to a local village’s blessing ritual, secure in the knowledge that it’s not only custom to wear the absolute palest white or undyed linen/woolen clothing one owns, it’s a requirement of the ritual and sacrilegious to do otherwise. Let’s see you deal with that miss all-black-wardrobe.

She arrives in diaphanous white silk edged with lace that gives the impression of beautifully tattered hems, all of it drifting gently around her on the spring breeze to give the feeling of a wraith from a haunted castle or something of the such. While not her personal cup of tea, she finds the ritual very moving, and absolutely understands why its one of her beloathed’s favorites.

One of the nobles from her kingdom, meanwhile, decides, fuck it, and just turns the prince into a frog. It takes her two minutes to find and fix him.

Villain noble: How.

Villainess: True love’s kiss, bitch.

Villain noble: (seethes)

The prince, meanwhile, pissed off the entire villainous court for the recent engagement ball that was held by knowing and responding accordingly to all the proper threats and insults. He studied before doing this, and he’s not going to shame darling in front of her peers! Bastard even managed to subdue his chivalry long enough to flirt with one of her friends right in front of her, how dare he be so considerate and sensitive to her needs like that-!?

[greentrickster]

First time the Prince finds out Villainess can transform into a gigantic fire-breathing dragon is a very O_OU moment for him.

Villainess: Are you surprised I can? It’s a common ability.

Prince: I didn’t want to assume.

Villainess: …

Prince: (sweats)

Villainess: …you’re picturing me turning into a dragon and riding on my back into battle, aren’t you?

Prince: N-no, no, of course not-!

Villainess: (drapes in his lap) It’s okay, we’d look fantastic. (sly expression) And probably scary enough to get the enemy forces to surrender without any needless bloodshed.

Prince: (sweating) Darling, are you trying to tempt me into putting you into a position where you could be injured in battle?

Villainess: A little. :3 (more seriously) But it is also on the table if we ever need to defend our throne. It’s the sort of thing that form’s for, really.

Prince: If you’re comfortable with it, then very well, it shall be added to the list of acceptable strategies.

(comfortable cuddling for a moment)

Prince: I imagine you make a very majestic dragon.

Villainess: (preening) I really do.

Prince: Perhaps we should have a tapestry done of it, then? It could hang opposite the one of my family’s crest in the throne room when we someday ascend the thrones ourselves.

Villainess: 8O! Beloathed, I would adore a tapestry of that! (cuddles further against him) Oh, and across from your family crest! That would be such a slap in the face to my parents, having a tapestry of me there instead of their own crest.

Prince: (hadn’t thought of it that way, but is happy that she’s happy)

[greentrickster]

Villainess comes in one night thoroughly out of sorts because her stupid cousin’s decided to make a move on her rights to the souls of their ancestors, and the jerk’s competent enough to actually have a potential chance at getting them, too, like he’d even wear the necklace of jewels they’re trapped in-!!!

The Prince listens patiently to her frustration until she’s finished, then considers for a few minutes.

“Darling, about that banquet your family’s having next fortnight - will your cousin be in attendance?”

“Yes, he’ll be using it to lay the groundwork of his plans. Why?”

“Would it be all right if I popped in for a bit? And was rather more… myself than I usually am around your parents?”

“…I suppose it’d be all right.”

“Wonderful!” (kisses her hand) “Perhaps wear those full-arm gloves your friend got you for the event - the ones that allow you to handle blessed objects without them interfering with your dark powers?”

“Well now I’m just curious. I shall do as you request, beloathed.”

The night of he shows up to the banquet positively radiating charm, good will, and benevolence, decked out in full armor that’s glowing slightly. Oh this? It’s the ancestral trappings of one of his relatives who was a champion of the stellar deities, those who guide ones who have become lost in darkness? He’s not a holy champion himself, but he is a fully-realized warrior of light and family, so he’s permitted to wear it at times. Oh yes, he completed his warrior of light trials when he was eighteen, when on a quest and everything! That’s where he earned his sword - it’s actually a shard of sunlight, you know, not metal. That’s why he’s called Prince of the Sun and Stars sometimes - bit of a grandiose title, really, but the artists and poets enjoy playing with the imagery, and who is he to deny them, especially when Darling is so fond of the stars herself! There’s a lass in one of the kingdom’s villages doing a portrait of the two of them together playing with that motif, actually, and it looks like it’s going to to be absolutely lovely when it’s done-

And he continues to be cheerful, charming, and just the nicest, most polite guy for the time he’s there while also reminding everyone in no uncertain terms that, for as long as the forces of evil have been trying to quash the forces of good, his side has been working at the opposite. And his side tends to win more often. And maybe it would be wise not to pick a fight with Darling because he’d hate to have to do battle with a potential in-law in the path of supporting her family’s traditions regarding people who cross them…

Jerk cousin is thoroughly cowed out of making an attempt at the family-filled jewels, and Villainess’s friends are standing with her off to the side going, “Okay, beginning to see what you see in him now.” Villainess herself is walking around with on safely-gloved hand on his arm as he intimidates the hell out of everyone she knows in order to help her protect what’s hers, swooning a little bit inside the whole time.

(Hers might be more diversely applicable, but Villainess isn’t the only one bringing something to the table in terms of power. Prince is generally more useful for things like getting birds to sing in chorus or making friends with bunnies, but his family does specialize in slaying evil. She may be skilled at facing enemies of all sorts, but he’s prepared specifically for anyone in her home court who might try to backstab her.)

[greentrickster]

@ninjakittenarmy  Is the gown made of actual spider silk. Because that sounds fitting, especially since spider silk is actually a really good material.

Princess: “You like it? It’s made of giant spider silk straight from the underdark!”

Prince: Oh uh that’s really- wait, you can make clothes out of spider silk?

Princess: Yeah! It’s really tough too! You can even make light armor out of it.

The two have a several hours long conversation about spider agriculture. The prince receives spider silk under armor as a wedding gift.

Oh my gods, yes, absolutely!

[greentrickster]

@imaginapalminthemorning  #Addams family origin story 

Congratulations, you are officially the smartest person on the entire thread, holy flip-?!?

[greentrickster]

Villainess is chilling in Prince’s court one day and a lady of the court storms up to her in tears, make-up running, and is just, “One of your friends turned my fiance into a newt, a newt, and he fell in the moat before I could catch him and I don’t know how to find him, or how to change him back if I do find him, and the library only has information on frog and bear transformations, and no one knows what to to do and you’re the only person who might know what to do, please help me-!” (bursts into inconsolable tears)

This throws Villainess through a loop, people don’t tend to whole-heartedly throw their trust in others like this at her place, this is super unsettling, so she just responds in the way she usually would, “Oh? And what price are you willing to pay?”

“Anything.”

…ooooooooh that is so, so tempting, why are people in this court so earnest, don’t they realize that the reason the higher nobles are worried about her marriage to their prince is the very real potential that she could use this opportunity to cast their country and its people into a thousand years of ruin and despair, bare minimum…?! But it would make Darling unhappy if she’s too mean about this, so, “How about your dignity, then? First off, we’ll have to get you out of that dress…” (seductive smirk and cock of the hips)

Court lady: (still in tears but hands immediately go to her bodice laces to start undoing)

Villainess: (grabbing her hands) OKAY, WHOA, HOLD UP, WE’RE IN THE MIDDLE OF COURT, HAVE SOME STANDARDS!!! Just- just go put on something you don’t mind getting all messed up, we’re going to have to get in the moat a bit for this, and even the edges are all muddy.

Court lady: Oh. (sniffles) Okay. Thank-you.

They spend the next three hours dredging around the moat to find the right newt and then perform the right ceremony to turn him human again. He appears naked and covered in mud and court lady unabashedly flings herself into his arms, sobbing in relief this time, and it’s disgustingly wholesome and romantic.

Newt Lordling: (once he’s finished doing a bit of sobbing of his own into his fiance’s hair) Wait, aren’t you Neskatina’s friend? Could you tell her that my sister likes daffodils? Girls, and daffodils? I tried to tell her myself, but the newt thing happened before I could get past asking her to stop with the threatening letters. We- we really don’t send those around here unless we mean it, she’s been finding it a bit upsetting. Daffodils would be much better received.

Villainess: …noted.

[thesaltofcarthage]

OH MY SAINTED AUNT PLEASE PUT THIS ON AO3 SO I CAN SUBSCRIBE TO IT

[json-derulo]

having the Aviation Accident Investigations Autism™️ has actually done wonders for the way I process and respond to my own fuck-ups

[json-derulo]

And I don't just mean "oh, my little work mistake is actually nothing compared to a fiery crash that kills people," either. The reason commercial flight is so many orders of magnitude safer than any other form of transportation is because after every accident and incident, an independent regulatory body investigated it with the express goal of figuring out exactly what happened, why, and how to prevent the same thing from ever happening again—not to root out which person deserved the blame or the liability.

It's a simple, shockingly effective idea. It's also worlds away from how most people approach their own mistakes and the mistakes of others.

[json-derulo]

Because it’s never just one person’s fault. And even when it is, it still isn’t. 

The sharpest, best-trained pilots make worse decisions when they're tired or sick or stressed out, so there's two of them. The most dedicated and experienced air traffic controllers garble an instruction over the radio sometimes, so pilots are trained to always repeat clearances back to catch misunderstandings quickly. The best and brightest maintenance mechanic still overlooks a screw or misconnects a wire once or twice in her career, so aircraft systems are built with two or three or four layers of redundancy, and pilots are exhaustively trained to deal with failures safely. 

Everyone eventually has a bad day. Every component breaks down. Every computer gets a bad a Windows update and spirals into a reboot doom loop. If it’s possible for one person’s mistake to domino into a mushroom cloud of a fuckup, then that task is too critical to be one person's sole responsibility. The accident sequence starts with the design of the system—so how do you improve the system to keep it from happening again?

[json-derulo]

oh yeah. The “modern commercial aviation is the safest form of transport” thing only applies to planes, btw. A helicopter is a beautiful metal horse that wants to break its legs and die so so so badly

[montaguethelorekeeper]

Do you think astronauts ever look down at the earth and see a sketchy storm cloud and feel like they should let someone know?

Astronaut: “Houston, you’ve got a problem.”

Control: “We’ve got a problem?”

Astronaut, watching King Ghidorah haul kaiju ass across the Gulf of Mexico: “Yeah you’ve got a fucking problem.”

[astronauticalaspirations]

#i mean this is what weather satellites do

Yeah, today NOAA's got five satellites in geostationary orbit beaming down pictures every ten minutes. But back in the early days, the pioneers of astronautics used weather prediction as a selling point for space travel. We'd set up space stations and astronauts could radio down what the clouds were doing.

It made sense at the time, but electronics got more reliable a lot faster than anyone expected, and satellites were able to do it perfectly well, and for less money than getting astronauts involved. Robots took those jobs before they even existed!

Same story with communications relays, incidentally. You'd need people onboard to change the tapes and replace burnt out vacuum tubes, right? Right?

[shamebats]

Most of those iPad babies you're seeing are probably sick of that fucking tablet too.

[shamebats]

A lot of parents are very bad at parenting and don't like their children. They don't want to talk to them, be around them or do anything with them. You know, the things kids need and will remember the most once they're grown.

So they train them from an early age that they should always be distracting themselves with something as to not be in the way or annoying the adults.

For me it was books and TV when I was little, and computers later on. That's all I did because it was all I could do without getting yelled at, and it was the closest to human interaction I could get most of the time.

[shamebats]

Everyone loves to make fun of & complain about iPad kids but nobody thinks about the struggle of navigating life as an adult when you were forced to spend your entire childhood keeping yourself distracted so your parents didn't have to acknowledge your existence.

[lemonylemus]

This was reposted to YouTube shorts and I would like to point out some comments in the video

[flip-this-table]

Please give your children some damn playdoh and crayons and oversized bits of craft paper to color on. They need something more concrete and tactile than smooth glass.

[themainspoon]

Maybe they do need something tactile, but you've missed the point of the post. It's not the Ipad itself that's bad, it's the fact that the children are being neglected. You could hand a kid a whole library of books, several kilograms of play dough, a mountain of crayons, and all the craft paper in the world. But, if you don't spend time with them and you simply expect them to use those things to keep themselves busy so you don't have to deal with them, you're still neglecting the kid, and they're gonna end up with the same issues.

[angstandhappiness]

IMPORTANT

[thebiscuiteternal]

Running across this post almost immediately after reading the article about how some parents are letting fucking ChatGPT tell their kids bedtime stories now feels serendipitous in a way.

[shamebats]

#so this is actually what i wrote my final thesis about for my bachelors in psychology #i ran an exeriment on kids below 5 that measured their social cognition levels (eg. understanding others emotions and needs etc) #and i also asked the parents about their kids screentime habits #and there was obviously a negative correlation between the two - so more screentime meant lower social cognition on average #BUT there were quite a few outliers with high amounts of screentime but also a higher level of social congition #and the explanation for that is that for these children screentime isn't there INSTEAD of interacting with the parents #screentime only affects the child negatively if parents use it as a distraction for the kids instead of interacting with them #so if a child watches some cartoon then the best a parent can do is sit with them and watch with them and talk about it with them #and then (limited) screentime can actually be beneficial for the development of other cognitive skills #so there is a large amount of scientific research out there that proves what ppl said in this post

That's really it. You'd probably have gotten similar results 30 years ago if you studied kids who are left to read books by themselves alone in their room for multiple hours a day vs kids whose parents read with them, or at least in the same room and talk to them about what they're reading. Because the former are most definitely also being neglected in other ways.

It's not as much about the tablets, it's about the fact that these children aren't being played with and talked to enough. Parents are using them as a get out of parenting tool instead of a parenting tool.

[bipolar4autistic]

i havent blogged the same since shane hollander came into my life

[etirabys]

probably no one else finds this funny and I’m driving away my friends a fraction of a percent at a time every time I do it, but I think the height of comedy is when you react to an emoji with the same emoji in a chat medium that permits this

[transwarlock]

literally

[knottahooker]

to escalate this, react with multiple versions of the same emote because nine different servers all have it available:

[rosemary-for-remembrance]

[kvothes]

some fun facts about the production of hamlet i’m in right now:

the ghost never appears physically

ghost scenes take place in complete darkness, lit only by the guards’ flashlights

rosencrantz and guildenstern’s first entrance involves a tango choreographed to beyoncé’s “crazy in love”

other transition music includes “applause” by lady gaga, “loveless” by lorde, “only angel” by harry styles, and “a little party never killed nobody”

gertrude is either drunk or hungover for the entire play

when polonius encounters hamlet to find the cause of his madness, hamlet is reading a copy of “infinite jest”

rosencrantz and guildenstern try to seduce hamlet into a threesome

they also try to seduce claudius

at intermission laertes goes onstage to practice his swordplay and flirt with the audience members in french. osric watches him from behind the curtain and takes notes

the pirates who deliver letters to horatio are dressed in trench coats, sunglasses, and fedoras

fortinbras is a thirteen-year-old boy

and finally:

hamlet doesn’t give the “to be or not to be” speech. horatio does. at the end of the play. over hamlet’s body

[fiddler-unroofed]

OP do you have a recording

[kvothes]

i do! part one / part two

[whirlwindsworld]

@the-mad-prince-of-denmark

[lizardrosen]

THE UNIVERSITY OF MICHIGAN PRODUCTION IS SO GOOD!! I’VE WATCHED IT FIVE TIMES, AND IT’S AMAZING

fun fact, I’d forgotten that last bullet point between the time I bookmarked this production and the time I actually watched it, and when the lights turned blue and horatio started speaking I screamed.

rosencrantz and guildenstern have a whole arc with their costuming getting more formal to reflect how they’re integrating more and more into the court, and it’s brilliant. they’re both incredibly lascivious at all times, and it’s the Correct Choice

I absolutely adore this ophelia, she’s sweet and sarcastic but so worn down by the expectations of the court culture, and even when she screams truth to power in her madness she still instinctively covers her mouth because of the awareness that people are Watching.

and gertrude has to be in my top five gertrudes i’ve ever seen, there’s so much nuance in her performance and!! when she comes onstage for “there is a willow” her coat sleeves are dripping water. she tried to save ophelia.

laertes comes back to denmark with his shirt half-untucked, and it really encapsulates how this actor approached the character, he feels caught between childhood and adulthood, trying to be the man his father always told him to be while still struggling to find out what he thinks is right. there’s a moment right before the duel where it feels like he’s about to genuinely forgive hamlet and call the whole thing off, but then claudius jumps in to interfere.

[totally-italy]

Sorry, @kvothes and @lizardrosen, do you happen to have any versions of that play which still work? Sorry, it says that the video is unavailable (to be fully clear, I am absolutely okay with any kind of bootleg). Please, I’m begging you, I’m studying Hamlet for my A-levels and would like to watch as many adaptations as possible. If not, are there any other productions that you would recommend which are interesting in terms of the characterisation?

[lizardrosen]

hi! you may have seen that OP put the current version of the link in a comment, but just in case you didn’t here’s part one and part two

i also really love and never shut up about the bethany lutheran college production, which has a really sympathetic claudius, who’s really in love with his wife and has the capacity for tenderness, but is always holding a tight grip on his capacity for violence, and has one of my favorite religiously anguished chapel scenes.

[evanzbuck]

Shane's big brown yearning bottom eyes

↳ bonus:

[skyrigel]

[catchymemes]

[bugslibraryy]

Guysss you KNOW baby Shane had a favourite soft toy like a lovely little bear- he literally named it ‘little bear’ that is so nice and soft he rubbed its little paw for comfort to sleep every night and it went EVERYwhere with him from when he was old enough to reach for it, tiny little toddler Shane running around the house dragging little bear behind him took it with him to kindergarten and on holidays and school camps and always his comfort, even going in to high school little bear was shoved under his pillow.

Then he thought he was too old for that kind of thing anymore and he got packed away and anyway one night Shane and Ilya are at Yuna and David’s for dinner and they are like oh Shane we got out some of your old stuff cause we moved some stuff to the storage locker etc etc and go through this book and see what you want to keep. And Ilya is doing his important job of being Shane’s chair while Shane goes through the boxes and Ilya reaches around Shane to pick up little bear who is squished in the box and he is like “who is this” and Shane is like oh just a toy and David is like ?????? Just a TOY! That’s little bear! And he’s telling Ilya how Shane wouldn’t EVER part with the soft toy for like the first six years of his life and the one time he had drive back two hours on a road trip to the hotel they’d left because someone little bear got left behind and when Shane woke up from his nap and realised it was like FUCK all hands on DECK we gotta go find this guy.

AnWAYYY Ilya is like omg ! This is a very important guy !!!!! How do I not know about him and like maybe he’s gonna cry a little because he’s thinking about tiny baby Shane and oh god. And then he tucks little bear under his arm and it’s ridiculous and he’s carrying him around the rest of the evening and teasing Shane a bit abt it and Shane just scoffs and deflects and then when they get home Shane realises Ilyas bought the toy home with him and he’s like Ilya 😠🙄 drop it and Ilya is like I was not kidding he seems very important to you I do not think he should be in david and Yuna’s storage locker !

Anywayyy Shane comes out of the shower and Ilyas laying in bed and little bear is next to Shane’s pillow and Shane is like 😠😠😠 Ilya. And all rolling his eyes and huffy puffy abt it and Ilya is like Shane. And grabs him and pulls him into bed and he is like why are you being so bitchy to your old friend and Shane gets all kinda quiet and chewing at the inside of his cheek and he’s like well. Isn’t it kinda lame and embarrassing. Like you don’t think I’m like lame for having him all that time like Ilya I was 14 before he got packed away! And Ilya is like big pretty eyes at Shane with that frown he gets when he is not happy how Shane is talking about himself. And Ilya is like Shane no I would never be like this- I think it is sweet and I feel sad that you had to give him up. I like anything that makes you happy and i am also serious I like this guy he is very cute and was best friends with cute baby Shane so I am big fan of his work. And Shane is all shuuudduppp and huffy and pushes at Ilya’s chest but he leaves little bear in the bed, tucked somewhere near their heads and that becomes little bears new home, between all of Shane’s nice interior designer pillows, and he goes with Ilya when he and Shane have to be apart and Shane catches Ilya on a bad day, napping with the stupid thing smushed to his chest and it kills Shane and then Ilya tucks it into Shane’s neck sometimes when he’s upset and overwhelmed and Shane’s heart is just 💫💫💫💫💫💫💫💫💫 because he can just be fully him wit Ilya’s and there only ever love no judgement just love love love

[bugslibraryy]

Like and that’s him that weird lil guy

[escapepodding]

Hollanov amnesia but instead of forgetting Ilya, Shane instead forgets hockey. Lack of memory also means he doesn't have context for why everyone is freaking out.

Shane: So my main source of income is gone and it will likely affect my other sources of income?

Yuna, holding his hand: Honey don't be ridiculous if you can't play because of this injury they still have to pay out to the end of your contract and we've already invested to make sure you're richer than anyone would ever need to be.

Shane: So what is the problem?

Ilya, in tears: What is in your head? What are you actually thinking about in their? You're brain is 95% hockey what is even left? How are you even still breathing???

They make Shane watch games to try and jog it back and he just looks afraid and slightly turned on. His loved ones WANT him to do that?! He's trying to read a WikiHow on hockey on his phone under the table to keep up with most conversations. He doesn't get it.

[some-lionheart]

but then they put him on the ice and muscle memory takes over. He can still play better than anyone, he just doesn't even know what a puck is called. He keeps referring to it as the hard tiny ball.

[chubby-cry-baby]

okay shane and ilya have their locations shared: shane never checks ilya he doesn’t even think about it but ilya checks… ilya watches shane exist; driving to practice then back home, going to the grocery store, going to the gym, going to hayden’s house, playing in different cities, going to a mall? oh he’s with rose, then he’s going back to the hotel, but his favourite is watching shane drive to ottawa, to ilya.

[sconesfortea]

I really enjoy when Dan fishes for a compliment and then manoeuvres into his "ready to receive flattery" position

[lovedbyflesh]

(｡•̀ ,<)~✩‧₊ this rivalry still heated