oscar Isaacs left ball sack

The tell tale heart was my autobiography

[beardedmrbean]

[theman]

I GOT A FUCKING RAISE THE POTATO WORKED WTF

[tattooedzombigirl]

This potato works. Every. Fucking. Time.

[imanutcase-10]

Then bring me luck

[thirddeadlysin]

the day after I posted this last time I was notified that I was selected for a really cool mentorship gig and got an unrelated glowing review at work

[icantbearsedtothinkofone]

Hey Potato, cure my -ing cold so I can have a good time while away.

[dduane]

Here's the potato. Make what use of it you will. :)

[beardedmrbean]

[theman]

I GOT A FUCKING RAISE THE POTATO WORKED WTF

[tattooedzombigirl]

This potato works. Every. Fucking. Time.

[imanutcase-10]

Then bring me luck

[thirddeadlysin]

the day after I posted this last time I was notified that I was selected for a really cool mentorship gig and got an unrelated glowing review at work

[icantbearsedtothinkofone]

Hey Potato, cure my -ing cold so I can have a good time while away.

[dduane]

Here's the potato. Make what use of it you will. :)

[punkitt-is-here]

[punkitt-is-here]

working out your brain is a must!!

• hydrate it by drinking lots of water

• eat dark chocolate and blueberries and walnuts and salmon and other foods high in antioxidants!!

• play little brain games on your phone; I like wordconenct! anything that makes you think!

• read books. It’s simple but necessary. Even better - join a book club, or read with a friend, so you can have discussions after. This will improve your reading comprehension.

• do puzzles - it doesnt have to be sudoku, I love playing Beat Saber on the Oculus Rift because it makes my brain have to match colorful patterns to physical movements very quickly!

• learn a new dance - even a tik tok trendy dance. Learning new dance moves are proven to strengthen synapses!!

• go bird watching, or foraging, or anything outdoors that requires you to explore pattern recognition and visual searching

• watch a movie with the intent of analysis - this is best done with a cinephile friend!! talk about tropes and symbolism and character growth

• cross stitch, or sew, or do anything that requires matching nimble hand movements to patterns

• play or learn an instrument!

• develop a consistent sleep schedule (or as close to consistent as you can get!)

• when eating, try to identify the ingredients and flavors you’re perceiving!

I hope this helps :)

(recreated since the original writer of this reply was a terf lol)

[punkitt-is-here]

I like how this went from me feeling like “hm why is this attacking me 🤨” at first, but feeling grateful seeing an added guide on a genuine expansion on a “ how to” work out the brain. This genuinely helps a bunch. People find solace in doing activities that get them through life by doing said activities of phone/tv or if that’s all they’ve ever known in their life to get them through things + etc tho. However, this was very impt to point out. Slowly beginning incorporating things to work the brain in ones own time.

[thewill0wtree]

Reblogging as if I have the will or the freedom to make any of these changes

God when did being me become so horrible

[silicacid]

simom tatham's puzzles

[hamletthedane]

Want to learn something new in 2022??

Absolute beginner adult ballet series (fabulous beginning teacher)

40 piano lessons for beginners (some of the best explanations for piano I’ve ever seen)

Excellent basic crochet video series

Basic knitting (probably the best how to knit video out there)

Pre-Free Figure Skate Levels A-D guides and practice activities (each video builds up with exercises to the actual moves!)

How to draw character faces video (very funny, surprisingly instructive?)

Another drawing character faces video

Literally my favorite art pose hack

Tutorial of how to make a whole ass Stardew Valley esque farming game in Gamemaker Studios 2??

Introduction to flying small aircrafts

French/Dutch/Fishtail braiding

Playing the guitar for beginners (well paced and excellent instructor)

Playing the violin for beginners (really good practical tips mixed in)

Color theory in digital art (not of the children’s hospital variety)

Retake classes you hated but now there’s zero stakes:

Calculus 1 (full semester class)

Learn basic statistics (free textbook)

Introduction to college physics (free textbook)

Introduction to accounting (free textbook)

Learn a language:

Ancient Greek

Latin

Spanish

German

Japanese (grammar guide) (for dummies)

French

Russian (pretty good cyrillic guide!)

[hamletthedane]

Want to learn something new in 2023??

Cooking with flavor bootcamp (used what I learned in this a LOT this year)

Beekeeping 101

Learn Interior Design from the British Academy of Interior Design (free to audit course - just choose the free option when you register)

Video on learning to read music that actually helped me??

How to use and sew with a sewing machine

How to ride a bike (listen. some of us never learned, and that's okay.)

How to cornrow-braid hair (I have it on good authority that this video is a godsend for doing your baby niece's black hair)

Making mead at home (I actually did this last summer and it was SO good)

How to garden

Basics of snowboarding (proceed with caution)

How to draw for people who (think they) suck at art (I know this website looks like a 2003 monstrosity, but the tutorials are excellent)

Pixel art for beginners so you can make the next great indie game

Go (back) to school

Introduction to Astronomy (high school course - free textbook w/ practice problems)

Principals of Economics (high school course - free textbook w/ practice problems)

Introduction to philosophy (free college course)

Computer science basics (full-semester Harvard course free online)

Learn a language

Japanese for Dummies (link fix from 2022)

Ukrainian

Portuguese (Brazil)

American Sign Language (as somebody who works with Deaf people professionally, I also strongly advise you to read up on Deaf/HoH culture and history!)

Chinese (Mandarin, Simplified)

Quenya (LOTR fantasy elf language)

[hamletthedane]

Want to learn something new in 2024??

Beginner-oriented video on how to sail

This guy has so many videos on baking different types of bread. SO very many.

Coding in Python - one of the most flexible and adaptable high-level programming languages out there - explained through projects making video games

Learn to swim! (for adult learners. I don’t care if you live in Kansas or Mali or wherever. LEARN TO SWIM.)

Learn how quantum mechanics works. Then read some more about it

[Learn about quantum mechanics again, but in a more advanced engineering/mathematics class. Then read more about the math and physics of it]

Poetry Handbook, by Mary Oliver

Something I learned this year: how to sew a quilt (Here’s a very easy beginning pattern that looks amazing and can be done with pre-cut fabric!)

How to hit the ball in softball

Tutorial video on what is under the hood of most (gas) cars + weird engine sounds and what they mean

Full beginner mechanics technical training, if you want to go more in depth

Playlist on how car engine physics work if you want to go ultra in depth

Lecture series on architecture design through study of buildings

How (American income) taxes & tax law work (choose “audit course” at checkout for free class)

Pickleball for beginners (so you can finally join your neighbor/friend/distant cousin who is always insisting you join their team)

+ Para-Pickleball for beginners (for mobility aid users!)

School is so much more fun when there’s no tests:

American Law - Contracts

Shakespeare’s Life and Plays

Fairy Tales: Meanings, Messages, and Morals

Modern Poetry

World History [Part 1, Part 2]

Learn a language:

Arabic + Resource Guide compiled from Reddit (includes info on different dialects)

Chinese (Cantonese) (audio)

Urdu (frequently recommended course on Reddit) + Resource Guide

Yucatec Maya

[stuckinapril]

what they didn’t tell you as a child is that you will spend your whole life trying to replicate the same unconditional happiness you so effortlessly experienced back then and that it will never quite feel the same no matter how hard you try

[heatwa-ves]

there's still a week left for the funniest possible thing to happen (charles dying before the coronation) like to charge reblog to cast or whatever

[oscarisaacsleftballsack]

OOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHH TO BE AN ANT IN A TULIP FIELD

[oscarisaacsleftballsack]

If (arbitrarily) 3 is a population, then people in polyamorous relationships could reasonably start coutries

[oscarisaacsleftballsack]

Lando leaving his stream on while he went to the shop is a level of unbothered I wanna reach

[lolwtfmemes]

[oscarisaacsleftballsack]

And she's right

[oscarisaacsleftballsack]

Kylo ren has to dye his hair once a week to keep up the illusion that he was born with black hair so he could fit the aesthetic of the dark side. In this essay I will -

[oscarisaacsleftballsack]

"2013 was ten years ago": reasonable, undisputed, absolutely lukewarm take.

"2018 was five years ago": YOU SHUT THE FUCK UP YOU GOD DAMN WITCH I WILL BURN YOUR HOUSE TO THE GROUND!!!!

[oscarisaacsleftballsack]

Not happy or sad, but a secret third thing (chemically altered)

[oscarisaacsleftballsack]

Goncharov is the 2020s version of the Marauders

[triangleguy]

hello...

[yandere-kokeshi]

— Worshipper of our ruler

Pairing: Yandere bee’s x gender-neutral reader

Warnings: Yandere behavior, gore description(?), reader has slight stockholm syndrome yet denies it, nakedness description and slight smut towards middle and end, and spiking the reader (reader gets drugged with immense pleasure!)

Authors note: These bee characters belong to @yanderemommabean — I decided to write a fic based on the alien bees cause I love them!! I also wanna say I hate the ending, I was unsure how to end it so sorry!! Enjoy though <33!

Happy Halloween by the way 🎃 🖤

Once you arrived at the planet with your crewmates, it was… interesting to see the bees work and arrive on a daily basis. They were hard workers, working 12 hours at a time to make sure their palace didn’t break. Though, you seemed to notice how there wasn’t a ‘queen bee’ or, at least someone in top control.

Other than the capital leader ruling, it was hard to keep up the palace rules and work-style. You could see that every poor bee was stressed, so you decided to offer some help, or at least be some help to them, even though you were a small human.

You thought they’d decline you, seeing that trespassers were killed on site, but the moment they saw you, they buzzed at you, staring at you with such adoration and animated-like heart eyes; falling head over heels for you.

Originally, the plan of coming here was to agree to the terms of peace with them and get out of there. But, when you came to meet the military and the capitol leader, they immediately saw something in you: a type of look in their eyes that would give anyone goosebumps. From then one, they and the other bees always wanted to be near you, praising and whispering of how wonderful you were. At first, you thought it was because they’ve never seen a human outside of their globe, so you couldn’t blame them or get upset.

They always grasped at your hands, comparing their huge paws to your… small ones. Seeing that you were way shorter than them, a few feet to be exact. The humanoid insects always insisted on taking care of you and keeping you inside, decorated you with the softest silk whilst using the excuse of ‘we’d never want you to get hurt!’.

They always carried you and always wanted to invade your privacy: begging to bathe you, rub their honey-scented lotion on your skin and hand-feed your favorite meals.

They loved you and always wanted to be near you. Their clingy behavior was exhausting, especially with their roaming hands that always clung to your body.

But, when it came for you to leave and escape from their palace, it was terrifying. The moment your captain patted your back, smiled and congratulated you for the hard work you did: gaining the trust of the bee colony. But to your surprise, you heard growling behind you, then swarming of the bees, rushing you to come with them; an ‘emergency’ taking place.

You left your captain behind, seeing that they desperately needed help. After they picked you up, flew you to your chambers while cooing at you, you realized what they were planning: ‘you’re such a wonderful ruler, please lie down on the bed for us!” and “We’ll please you, you’re so pretty!”.

You remember losing your voice in your throat, getting hit climax after climax whilst your body ached of pure pleasure. You wanted to move, scream, yell at them and tell them to stop. But, you couldn’t, they looked at you with such—

“Your majesty?”

You blinked in surprise, looked at the doorway as you rested on the giant bed; connecting eye contact to a female worker. Of course you had zoned out, I mean… how couldn’t you? You’re taken captive in a huge place that is surrounded with thousands of humanoid bees, who expected much from you.

“Y-yeah?” You answered anxiously, looking at your clothes whilst fiddling with your fingers.

Her buzzing was loud. She smiled happily, coming in to deliver in which… what looked like a good meal but you weren’t hungry per say. You were rethinking your life choices, the ‘what if’s’ spiraling in your head as the event replayed in your mind.

You remember that day so clearly, as if it was yesterday. At this point, you’ve lost count on how long you’ve been on this planet; everyday was and is a ‘new day’.

If you could, you'd escape, get up and frantically look around but each time you did, you were gently pushed back into the soft cloud-like bed. They always praised you, saying ‘you need to rest for the young!’.

Yeah right, you couldn’t! It was almost—

“So!” The female bee started, her antenna’s bouncing: “Today we are scheduled to have you do some bed-work. But of course, we’ll take it easy.” She chirped loudly, clasping her hands together as her wings fluttered.

You nodded hesitantly, smiling anxiously. Hearing multiple footsteps, you glanced at the hallway behind her, seeing more workers welcoming themselves into your chamber, shuffling around hugely.

Your heart raced, seeing that the female worker kept babbling on what you’ll do that day, but you couldn’t concentrate on her. Seeing that the male workers that came in, were huge… a whole lot taller than the woman in front of you talking about the damn schedule.

“Does that sound good, your Majesty?” She asked, leaning down to observe you innocently.

“Uh… what?” You asked, shaking your head at your thoughts. You readjusted yourself on the bed, leaning on your knees at her.

She frowned, making an apologetic face: “If that doesn’t sound good, I’ll make a change!” She stated loudly, grabbing the paperwork from the clipboard she was holding, looking through it: “I understand this whole new schedule may sound stressful, we only want what’s best for you!”

“No..! No, it’s fine,” You assured her, grabbing her hand gently, slightly squeezing it.

She still had a frown on, “Are you sure? I can change it!” She moved to grasp both of your hands together, looking at you with her big doe eyes. Her hands were extremely warm and cozy, it almost wanted to make you hug her, have a massage and possibly fall asleep in the cozy bed of yours.

You smiled to not make her upset, reassuring her again, “Yes—yes it’s fine.”

She smiled again, her wings twitching from the praise you gave to her. “Mhm! I’ll tell the captain while the others get ready for your bath. Please enjoy your meal, your Majesty!” She bowed at you, her antenna’s bouncing within her movements.

She left the room, shutting the door with a slight ‘click’. Then, some male guards come in, representing a ‘protective call’ from the military captain. Normally, they’d come in and ask if you wanted anything or they could do something, but they were terrifyingly quiet.

As you finished your meal, you exited your room to the bathroom, where you met some bee workers in the bathroom, almost waiting for you to arrive.

“Oh, your Majesty! we weren’t expecting you yet!” The male one said, who got up to bow at you; slightly smiling whilst buzzing with excitement. “Please,” He started again, his hand directing at the tub: “Enjoy the warm bath as I get the wash workers!”

You smiled towards him, nodding at his statement as you watched him slide past you. Even with their high intelligence and tall structure, they always were so kind and gentle with you. Watching your every move as if you would shatter like glass, it was comforting to know at some limit.

As you undressed yourself, leaving the dirty silks on the white-covered floors, you welcomed yourself to the right temperature of water. You sighed heavily, leaning back against the tub as you played with the water with such boredom.

“My Ruler?”

You jumped and screamed, slightly pressing yourself against the corner of the bathtub. You made direct eye contact with a few female workers, one of them being the other bee lady that was in your room earlier.

“Uh,” You started, “Hi…?” You said awkwardly, embarrassed with the loud yelp you expressed.

They all giggled, hand pressing against their lips as they welcomed themselves into the bathroom, making sure to place your clean clothes on the sink; including letting them join you in the warm water, which was quite comforting.

As the girls helped wash you, gently rubbing the loofah on your delicate and squishable body; taking extra precaution on and around the purple-hickeys and sore spots. They purred at your pretty skin, commenting that: ‘it always smells and looks so pretty!’. They kissed every inch of your skin, looking at you like a rare piece of ore.

Then, two of them gently lifted you up, making sure to wrap a towel around your body, getting your legs and arms well dried before leading to the well-known bedroom of yours. Of course, they dressed you in the best of silks that were made for their best ruler, they only cared about you and your opinion on things after all.

One of the female workers sits you on the bed, making a ‘nest’ in front and behind you before making sure to comb your luscious locks to take out any knots that had formed. This was probably your best part, slightly humming to the every know and again giggles that came out of them when you groaned in satisfaction.

All of the sudden, the sound of the main lady bees made you come out of your euphoria coma: “Dear Ruler…? May we do something?” She smiled in her tone.

You nodded from behind, expecting something other than the now-roaming hands all over your body: making you gasp yet moan in surprise from the extreme pleasure that had occurred all of the sudden.

You felt hot… extremely hot and wet.

“Oh, G–od,” You murmured under your breath, leaning over and trying to concentrate on your breathing other than the multiple warm… hands that worked around your hips, sliding down your thighs and back. It makes your skin have goosebumps, almost pleasuring you just by touching your skin.

“The medication seems to be working,” A female voice purred loudly, making you feel ashamed from the liquid running down your now-open thighs.

You sighed shakily, “T–the… what?”

They all giggled, their hands massaging your back and bum as they squished every part of your body. It made you whine loudly, pressing your back against what you could describe as a pillow of clouds.

You looked up, seeing the bee lady pleasuring you from behind. Realizing... you were laying on her chest: “Oh–Please… S–top. Let me—”

She ignored your protests by giggling, rubbing her nose against yours and continuing her and the other assaults on your poor body that made you so hot and bothered that it seemed to make you desperate for any contact.

They all gathered around you, pampering your delicate skin with kisses and petting your hair: “continue for us, your Majesty. We want more, nothing to be embarrassed of!” They chriped one after the another, buzzing and fluttering loud and clear.

“Oh… God,” You whined, grabbing the sheets under you as you reopened your eyes to see much more workers than you remember seeing.

You quivered from the goosebumps, slapping their hands away in overstimulation.

They all looked at you, making you speak up: “Please… no more. Wha.. ah… did–you do to me?”

“Your Majesty,” One of the male workers started, “Please don’t fret!” He frowned. “We’ll take good care of you, like how you took care of us when we relied on your aid.”

They all nodded, watching your reactions very closely before grasping at your body again: “Please! Allow us to pleasure you in any way… you deserve it.”

Before you could speak again, your body and mouth betrayed you: body violently shaking from the immense pleasure that jolted through you like lightning and babbling out curses.

“Your Majesty,” A female bee started, pushing you on your back as more surrounded you: “We’ll make this as pleasurable as you want! Please, allow us to touch you in ways!” She begged, joining the continuous assaults on you.

All you could do was moan, whine, and whimper as praises and love comments were thrown at you one after another. It was like a dream, a pure… pleasurable dream.

—

Reblogs, comments and likes are very much appreciated!! Thank you all for reading <33

My masterlist | Stay well!

[oscarisaacsleftballsack]

Imagine simping for a half-blind man who is speaking literal SIMLISH 🤨🤨

Could NEVER be me, but y'all stay safe out there 😜