Evil Genius

I'm trying to be the kind of person I needed when I was younger.

[jake-clark]

[meiiiwaku]

@hellsite-hall-of-fame @worldheritagepostorganization

[hellsite-hall-of-fame]

is this the ORIGINAL?!???

[laughconfetti]

[allsadnshit]

tumblr is for putting your stuff somewhere that's not secret but also not for anyone particular to see so it's true neutral in a really nice way

[scratch-meowt]

my hottest take

[keeper-of-the-flames]

Counter point, those machines can make me a peach sprite.

[pusheenthenerdcat]

guys did you know the tech in that nefangled machine revolutionized preemie healthcare

[maimonideznuts]

[pusheenthenerdcat]

yeah the guy who invented them made incredibly precise infusion pumps (as opposed to gravity fed ivs) which not only meant they could give medications to teeny tiny babies safely, it's also used for insulin pumps and portable dialysis machines. the key element is that it's a peristaltic pump so the liquid stays in sterile tubing for safety

(unholy drink cloaca uses it to dispense precise amounts of flavored sugar syrup)

[hedgebotherer]

Then how the haters loved him,

As they shouted out with glee,

"Unholy Drink Cloaca

You'll go down in history!"

[naamahdarling]

You DON'T get this on any other site in quite this format.

[snowychicken]

Is this a threat?

[its-uh-bella]

I've only ever seen edits of this image until now

[snowychicken]

I saw this reblog and thought "there aren't that many edits of this post. There's just the gun one and a few close ups of the orangutan's face." Turns out I just wasn't paying attention

Anyway, I felt the need to gather them all

If there's any others PLEASE show me

[pointnclick]

hello male writer. before you is a typewriter. you have one day to write a novella with a woman as the protagonist without describing her breasts. the timer begins now

[wander-in-arda]

Her ass was like a peach, and brother I’m in her pit.

[pointnclick]

well. that one’s on me

[ourbooksuniverse]

[liaragaming]

This is the best string of posts that's ever come across my dash.

[lemoncakeartses]

I’m stealing this image I saw on a random femcel blog and making it (angled) aroace

[sloth-at-night]

yeah i love sex too but you know it isn't real, right? they made it up for fanfic, like omegaverse

[dogb1scuit]

to me, bugs are like sex/romance

i like the idea of bugs and sex/romance but in reality i am absolutely terrified and freaked out by both.

edit: how did this get over 1000 notes

[thesillydoll]

Do I like sex? No, how disgusting 🤢. Do I like spending hours reading about two gay men having sex? Duh, obviously 🙄.

[all-my-simpings]

Friend: Don't you want to have a romance?

Me: I'm good, I have romance at home.

Romance I have at home:

[fladurblegon]

“What if poor people abuse the system?”

The system intrinsically abuses poor people.

Hope this helps.

[breninarthur]

"What if poor people abuse the system?"

Rich people abuse the system far more and out of pure greed, not necessity or desperation so idrc about that

[colubrina]

[nevereverbird]

[allsadnshit]

Being an adult in this recession and being like wow I am totally "splurging" on 3 new sets of cotton underwear and 3 pairs of socks like whoaaaaa hold your horses duke of the land where's all this money gonna come from

[em-bitterred]

Keep your priorities straight: post fic.

[flygoing]

laptop overheating?? pour water on it to cool it down!

[chastittie]

i trusted you

[flygoing]

Do not trust people like me. I will take you to museums, and parks, and monuments, and kiss you in every beautiful place, so that you can never go back to them without tasting me like blood in your mouth. I will destroy you in the most beautiful way possible. And when I leave you will finally understand, why storms are named after people

[four-leafed-queer-gal-deactivat]

THE ORIGINAL?!?!?!?!?!