trans your gender

hello im here to trans genders and take names and im all out of names (he/him)

[mevil]

[donnatartlet]

[fagstaynight]

Sorry boss i cant come into work tomorrow the old jolly king just slapped his belly and leaned back in his chair with a big leg of lamb in his hand and loudly declared that the festivities shall last all through the night

[myfootyrthroat]

Someone will say "as a queer person in the heart of empire, my life is in danger every day" and you'll find out they're a developer for Amazon and live in San Francisco or Seattle or some shit, and then you'll meet a trans girl from Alva, OK who's like "Yeah, things are pretty good. AutoZone moved me to full-time."

[charl0ttan]

[cassili]

[what-even-is-thiss]

The reason your snacks are unsatisfying is that you need both carb and protein.

Carb starts your engine, protein keeps it going.

No carb, engine don’t start. No protein, engine dies out fast.

[what-even-is-thiss]

Easy carb add on:

Cookie

Fruit (canned or fresh)

Chips

Piece of bread

Popcorn

Crackers

Easy protein add on:

Nuts

Spoonful of nut butter

Cheese

Roasted chickpea snacks

Glass of milk (dairy or non dairy)

Small canned sausages or similar

[what-even-is-thiss]

Sugar in there.

[what-even-is-thiss]

I am pleased by people messaging me telling me that after adding a carb or protein to their snacks or meals they feel more satisfied all day. Yes, my plan is working. People are getting through their days with less hangry.

[kleefkruid]

saying cats don't contribute to the household is slander: they do have a job and it's going into mystery crevices and collecting all the cobwebs on their stupid little head

[notahorseindisguise]

this one . i missed this . that great you can go ahead and order it

[chronicillnesshumor-deactivated]

Doctors are like: ughhhhh. You're confusing. Come back if you die

[segamascott]

[kitkenk]

screw bedtime 😈😈 tonight we are staying up until 9pm

[segamascott]

[phillip-bankss]

tipping

[mevil]

[torchickentacos]

one of the best pieces of advice I've ever heard (for myself, at least) is that if you're in a terrible mood and NOTHING is helping, then start doing the chores/responsibilities/job stuff/etc that you've been putting off. Will it put you in an even worse mood temporarily? Probably, but you're already pissed off, so you might as well double up on it at that point 😭 there's no loss. It's not like finally getting around to cleaning the house and scheduling appointments is going to ruin the good day that you aren't currently having to begin with 💀 And then, when the bad mood passes, you'll have gotten shit done and you'll feel a lot better later, even if in the moment you're having The Worst Time Ever about it.

[skinks]

I love that thing when people get a little bit tongue-tied and garble what they’re trying to say so they make a little “blegh” 👅 noise and start over. verbal reset button. hitting the top of the tv to unscramble the signal

[wifegideonnav]

“bits to use in everyday conversations”