Kenetix

a person… probably 18, don’t be shocked if you see 18+ stuff reposted

[daily-specilfeacher]

Day 86: happy 1st anniversary

[cherryglittrbomb]

my tt vid

[mawofthemagnetar]

What do you mean “chat” is now referring to ChatGPT and not twitch chat? What? What? What the fuck? No?

When I address chat I am speaking to a presumed Greek chorus of real human people shitposting on their lunch break, not a machine that devours lakes to covert electricity into slop.

[salad-006]

I like to imagine Darkners are born as very simple creatures

And slowly, they develop more detail and personality as a Lightner spends more time with them

[grimoiremanifest]

finding somebody who will laugh at your shitty jokes is joy-inducing but finding a motherfucker who can yes-and all the esoteric bullshit you put out is pure cocaine. this must be the shit all those racuous but good-natured scoundrels down at the tavern are on

[ozempicofficial]

[nudityandnerdery]

"[Y]our Harry Potter games are Cybertrucks" is such a good way to put it.

[storybookprincess]

being sick & miserable objectively sucks, but it has become significantly easier to cope with since learning that “sickness behavior” is a well documented part of the body’s immune response

feeling not only physically but also emotionally like fucking garbage is unfortunately an extremely effective way to force your body to prioritize fighting infection & keeping you alive. i don’t have to like it, but knowing why i get weepy & pathetic when sick does help at least a little

[autumn2may]

i just found out that this is not common knowledge and am reblogging so more people know

YOUR BODY DOES THIS ON PURPOSE

YOU ARE NOT A BAD PERSON BECAUSE OR "WEAK" WHEN YOU ARE SICK IF YOU CAN"T CARRY ON AS NORMAL

[tartrazeen]

Rereading this on my sick days 🙏🏽

[survivablyso]

... so if you have a loved one with a chronic illness maybe go easy on them if they're like this permanently it's not their fault

[comfybutter]

Mommy's going to take you out of the freezer and leave you in a room temperature environment, ok? Awww you're already dripping condensation... There's a puddle gathering at your base, my leaky little condensation slut.

[maidthings]

can you put that on a coaster

[comfybutter]

No. I want her to see all her little circle stains on the table...

[maidthings]

okay thats cute and all but this table was my grandmother's so i would really appreciate it if you could stop and actually consider other peoples belongings for 2 fucking seconds

[asteroidtroglodyte]

Me, tears streaming down my face, sobbing, as I stare at the stars: it’s just so beautiful

The medieval peasant I went back in time to give a bag of Doritos to, concerned: what terrible and powerful sorcerers they must have in your age, to be able to veil the vault of heaven itself from view, as you say

Me, sniffling: I didn’t realize, I can’t, it’s so much, I, I… are the chips good, at least?

Medieval peasant, trying to make me feel better: they’re… magical, strange traveler

[asteroidtroglodyte]

This hit 10k in A DAY

Y’all ok?

[sweetcardamom]

3 days, almost 60k, lol.

[asteroidtroglodyte]

Somebody already posted it to Reddit, where it has averaged roughly 1 interaction per second

The People crave Starlight

[bearloonz]

Aint no way dude wtf

[mxmuffin]

Bubble's gonna say some shit like this to Caine next episode

[dumbpuppyfag]

UNGRATEFUL tech companies are saying things like "turn off your ad blocker" and "we need your photo id" instead of "thank you so much for not just pirating our shit, youre so handsome"

[tall]

[flotorshi]

Literally every episode of My Cat from Hell

[sinningsleepingandshitposting]

Neatly summarized as: people not knowing how to properly take care of cats

[impuretale]

The episodes that don’t conform to this formula are also always the most interesting. These situations include:

1) I Didn’t Know My Cat Had PTSD and Has Gone Blind.

2) Your Cats Fight Because One of Them Doesn’t Know How to Speak Cat, and They’re Both Kinda Mad/Confused About It. 

3) Your Cat Sprays Everywhere? Get Them Fixed. Surprise Twist: They Were Fixed But It Was a Botched Operation.

4) We’re Going to Rescue 50+ Kittens, Take Them to Vegas, and Adopt Them All To Loving Homes.

5) This is Not a Cat. This is a Dog. 

[libertarirynn-deactivated202006]

Hang on what was number five?

[teamvoorhees]

@libertarirynn   #5 was - 

[lastcupofsorrow-deactivated2024]

THATS A DOG?

[krystal-prisms]

This is one of the least dogs I’ve ever seen

[snissel7]

I would like to apologize to #5 for laughing

[thehappysmiler]

[beaked-whales-in-exile]

Instead of this whole "unlearning shame" bullshit, we should really be teaching people to distinguish between when you feel bad because you genuinely did wrong and when you're just beating yourself up for no good reason.