oh alright @pencilgore - Tumblr Blog

cool cool cool i need to start raising funds to flee the country immediately.

anyway hi i'm a mentally disabled homeless addict and the latest executive order isn't looking so great for me so if y'all could help spare some funds so i can fuckin flee the country asap that'd be much obliged

flagellant

yall i try not to ask for too much aid beyond the occasional grocery money thing but like. if you could reblog this even if you cant help otherwise it'd mean a lot to me

dogpuppy

bananacockroach

Hit the hay so hard last night that i found the needle

Missing my first child being born because dutch bros is giving out cockrings that say 'stay awesome grindqueen!' and their two locations in my town have lines that wrap into every single street within a two mile radius

#dutch bros #I like a sweater weather chai every once in a while but this is ridiculous #my mind cannot comprehend the amount of brand loyalty happening around me

infectiouspiss

i may have made a mistake by jerking it a little too hard last night because turns out the cervix softens up before a period to let the slime out easier. and i might have beaten her up just a touch

pencilgore

Straight up jorkin it soft n slimy style

segamascott

#Logan if you see this hope you're doing good

ayeforscotland

Roughly 6 months in and the US is already at the ‘full blown concentration camps’ stage.

ayeforscotland

The scum of the earth have found this post. Block the far right and move on.

monsieurenjlolras

This is your regularly scheduled reminder that "Life finds a way" is about the dinosaurs becoming transgender

micromentality

🧵 borrow-error Follow

ugh this human i’m living with is torturing me, they keep leaving fresh cut strawberries RIGHT outside the wall entrance on the countertop

🧵 borrow-error Follow

the strawberries are right there. i could just grab a slice and be back in the wall before they even knew what happened

🧵 borrow-error Follow

fuck it. i’m getting a strawberry

🌱 secret-world-of-rickie Follow

Good luck, op! Be careful!

🪤 mousehole-surfers Follow

hell yessss get that strawberry!!!! 🍓

🪡 live-by-the-needle Follow

hey, op it’s been a few hours is there an update?

👟 beansightings-updates Follow

guys it’s been a couple days i think that human fucking killed them

📌 pest-you-cant-control Follow

RIP error hopefully you got to try those strawberries before you were caught 🙏

🧵 borrow-error Follow

hey all! still alive! sorry for disappearing, the human is actually really nice! it just gave me the strawberry slices. like obviously we should keep being wary of humans, but this one is super chill

and yes, they tasted amazing 🤤

🏚️ watchingfromthewalls Follow

you fucked the human didn’t you

🧵 borrow-error Follow

of course not??? you think i don’t have an ounce of respect for my species?? you think i’d disgrace all borrowerkind by letting myself be manhandled and degraded into some toy for a giants pleasure??? it shared its food with me and we talked for awhile, as equals, and then we parted ways as friends. that’s it. god there are some freaks on this site

📎 hook-me-up Follow

you absolutely fucked the human

micromentality

🧵 borrow-error Follow

kill your self

🧵 borrow-error Follow

also im not a fae it literally says borrower in my username

🧵 borrow-error Follow

ur just jealous cuz i fucked a human

comedownstairsandsayhello

2027: Wizards of the Coast and the American Psychological Association collaborate on the D&DSM, 6th Edition, widely regarded as the worst thing ever published

crabussy

hi gang. reminder that we are some of the best sweaters in the animal kingdom (second only to equines) allowing us to stay cool and keep moving in hot weather. we have 10 times the density of sweat glands compared to other great apes.

we are ALSO insanely good at smelling rain (specifically geosmin, found in the soil and activated by rain) with the ability to smell 10 parts per trillion. this is speculated to have helped our ancestors survive!

we ALSO have absolutely batshit diets compared to most other animals. caffeine and chocolate are completely toxic to most animals but we can eat it without even feeling sick. even avocados are severely toxic to many animals to the point where it can be fatal to eat, but humans love it!!!

we are ALSO the best endurance runners ON EARTH out of ANY other species. we beat horses in endurance running. you know, the animals that gradually evolved away most of their toes in order to be the best runners?? yeahhh.

and to top it all off. our lifespan is unusually long for our species' weight/mass. typically, the bigger a species is, the longer its average lifespan (e.g. domestic mice live for 1-3 years, whales can live over 200) but we're very small for how long our average lifespan is. big cats like tigers live around 14-15 years, brown bears 25 years, yet here we are expected to live around 75-85 years. that is NUTS.

humans as a species are so extremely cool. it's not just our intellect that makes us amazing. we may not be the fastest or the strongest in the animal kingdom but we're super cool in many other ways. next time you sweat you can go wow!!! humans are so cool I'm able to keep moving because of my absolutely insane number of sweat glands! thank you evolution!

cryptotheism

she let me hit it because...ghhhh....she let me- *pants* ughhh my head.... Why can't I remember?? Graaah [cursed pussy begins to throb]

transgenderization

in the club gettign a drink would anybody else like a drink

0111010001110010011000010111000

in the club spilling my drink on you by accidnet srry

transgenderization

in the club going soggy mode

memewhore

fuckblast

They're opening the largest one from 1975 in like 19 months.

bunjywunjy

ONE MONTH

bogleech

One more day

But I think they should let nebraskans keep whatever thet can grab out of it, like a pinata

thewizardofhoes-speaking

theshitpostcalligrapher

Is anyone in Toronto moving out?

Okay so there's no immediate pressure or move out date, but due to a few reasons, I'm looking to move from my current apartment to somewhere else in toronto

Apartment hunting in this city is hhhhh nightmarish? to say the least??

So I'm abusing the whole large-blog-following deal to see if any of yall are local and are in the process of looking for someone who'll take over a lease or need a roommate, since this seems to be one of the easiest ways to put out feelers for queer-friendly apartment inquiries without getting facebook involved

Like I said, there's no rush, but I only own a living room's worth of stuff that can be packed up in a day (esp if i can rope my girlfriend's car and my friends' cars into the situation) so the move-timeline can be super flexible

theshitpostcalligrapher

#maybe someone else in Toronto will see this#may all the hermit crabs gather together and find a bigger shell

no but that's so cute actually the mental image of us scuttling around together 😭😭😭