gandalf the green

@RealDonaldTrump would you care to comment on the ska vs reggae debate

[shadow-wizard-moneygang]

ngl bro if your device is putting out so much radiation its causing the camera footage to do that i dont think aluminum foil is going to shield you

[schlaflosewurst-deactivated2022]

GO WHITE BOY GO!

[eighth-order-simulacra]

WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT

[shadow-wizard-moneygang]

he cast the spell of "shut up your noisy neighbor"

[coughloop]

[micro-usb-deactivated20230625]

You are now entering Steely Dan Saturday

[ostolero]

[tempered-grace]

very funny to me that calories is legit just a measure of energy. you can convert it to joules. (4186 joules in one kcal). really drives home the absurdity of diet culture.

[dollgirllandsknecht]

She has over 4 megajoules of energy.

and this little lady is only 4 Calories

[stanfordgsb]

Success is one person’s life being better because of what we do, shared Elizabeth Holmes, the founder and CEO of medical device and technology company Theranos. “Now it’s about doing it again and again for more and more people.“  Read more insights on Twitter from her Stanford GSB View From The Top talk: stanford.io/1qEOogA #GSBvftt

[were--ralph]

Post the most recent gif you have with no context

[whencartoonsruletheworld]

mr were--ralph i think we all know the context as to why you saved that gif

[were--ralph]

You dont know me

[nyctosaurid]

barnyard the original party animals is the uncontested lord of bad implications in childrens movies

[nyctosaurid]

ok so like “the secret life of x” movies tend to not strongly explore the actual reasons why, exactly, their life has to be secret… they don’t really focus on it within the narrative. They do usually have some small justification for why animals or video games or toys or whatever have never just revealed themselves:

There’s no stated reason. They just pretend to not be alive. We usually can suspend our suspension of disbelief here because when it’s something like a video game or an emoji because any odd occurrences is perceived as a glitch or something similar but the actual reason why they aren’t too hung up on this kinda shitty lot in life isn’t said

They get something out of their current relationship with humans (like in toy story)

They have some specific reason to hide that they’re alive, like they die if they’re seen (like in the christmas toy)

They perceive themselves as sentient, talking creatures, but humans can’t understand them. They just see a squeaking mouse or an inanimate hot dog or whatever. 

and the last one is what most animal movies do, and it’s like, not devoid of weird implications but you can see where it mostly works.

but barnyard is the outlier here: it goes with tier one: the animals can talk and walk on two legs but just pretend that they can’t for unstated reasons. 

in the history of the barnyard world non human animals, at some point, decided to just pretend to be unable to speak. a “cow” or a “coyote” or a “hen” do not exist as we know it in the barnyard universe. the baa of the sheep is false; the ewe doesn’t understand it either. they only made up that noise to hide the fact that they speak human languages. a dog barking and running on all fours is a facade. animals naturally walk on their hind legs and made up whole postures just to appear non sentient.

and for what? what do they gain from this? they have no rights and no voice by their own choice. at one point a donkey claims the farmer is a good person because he’s vegan and a pig mentions bacon - this is not a fantasy universe devoid of death and misery and meat. do animals, in hushed whispers, remind their children not to sob in their real voice as they’re taken away? do the dogs not beg for kindness when they’re tied up and hit? do cows and chickens not cry for their life in the slaughterhouses? does a rat not scream a human scream when the trap misses their neck and only breaks their spine? Why? what is the point? They loose so much and have everything to gain.

anyways does everyone remember this really awful cat. it only appears in one scene but i can just sense the porn of it that would pop up if i googled it’s name

[inkthecryptid]

This post is like being tied to a chair as a a joker-style villain monologues and presses a gun closer and closer to my head as he reaches the climax of his rehearsed piece on the flaws of society and when he finally pulls the trigger it’s a little flag that says “bang!”

[flork-of-cows-official]

Tell Flork, he's just like hos father

Did you mean “his father” or “hog father”

[beardedmrbean]

[siryouarebeingmocked]

[currentlycryingaboutlancelot]

the funniest part of much ado is after claudio and hero get engaged and beatrice is like “meanwhile I’m over here!!! forever alone!!! I wish someone like don pedro would ask me to marry him haha!!” and don pedro is like “would you like me to marry you?” and beatrice says no.

[english-history-trip]

[yubriamakesart]

"Scrooge said that he would see him—yes, indeed he did. He went the whole length of the expression, and said that he would see him in that extremity first." - Charles Dickens, A Christmas Carol

[tlirsgender]

A nonhuman character in heavy makeup: *is very long*

Me: is that you, Doug

The credits: Freaky Creature played by Doug Jones

Me: YEAHHHH

[agir1ukn0w]

A nonhuman character in heavy makeup: *does that elegant hand movement that Doug always seems to do*

Me: DOUG!!!

[texnessa]

How dare anyone over look:

[dollsahoy]

Where it started

[laughterkey]

DOUG WAS MAC TONIGHT??

[icarus-suraki]

Y’all also need to know that Doug Jones was in Smash Mouth’s music video for “All Star” as Pencil Head:

[gallusrostromegalus]

@cellarspider It’s your Blorbo from apparently everything?

[jerico3193]

[frizz01percy]

this should be the most reblogged post on tumblr before it dies

[xan-thos-blog]

We need to reblog this so much that the post breaks

[bittymoonbear-deactivated201807]

Do not like

[secret-unicorn-sierra-blog]

Keep. Reblogging.

[dawn-machine-official]

If we reblog enough we could save it

[vwidjojo]

Reblogged at 1.7 M notes

[weirdo09]

reblogged at 1.8M notes

[earhartsease]

how did this lose over 5k notes

[cybermax]

I’m glad we cost Yahoo 2 billion dollars.

[cybernetic-divinity-deactivated]

it’s like a perfectly preserved body at Pompei

[jjsbizarreadveyj]

Finding this on my normal dash is like taking a stroll through the Park and suddently stumbeling upon the Codex Hammurabi just lying there.

[justplainrain]

[whale-blanket]

[video: gianni matragrano, cosplaying as columbo, walks up to a kitchen counter and says: “hi there. uh,” (loud fumbling for his wallet, opening it to show an id) “lieutenant columbo, LAPD, homicide department.”

he puts his wallet back. someone uses twitch points to overlay someone throwing a pipebomb onto the screen. gianni says, trying to contain a laugh, “pipebomb.” the pipebomb explodes. cheering erupts. end alt text.]

[dorian-they-ao3]

IT’S A WONDERFUL LIFE (1946) • JIMMY STEWART as George Bailey and LIONEL BARRYMORE as Mr. Potter

[radiofreederry]

[ghw-archive]

The Making of the Perfect Martini, Guy Buffet (b. Paris, 1943), Lithography, 2000.