do you know how I can adopt cooper out of twin peaks the return

Dhara|she/her|ENFP

[sunnypeachyy]

Push-ups king

[dailyhudsonwilliams]

Hudson and Connor meeting fans in Toronto yesterday

[trippedlaces]

So anyway, let’s talk about what happens when Shane finds out that Wiebe is bisexual. 

Because during The Long Game, Ilya decides not to tell Shane because it’s not his secret to tell, and Shane has to find out eventually, right? Wiebe says something like “I’m sure Ilya has told you that I understand a little bit about your situation.” And Shane is thinking like, what, you definitely don’t, you were a mid player at your absolute best. But eventually Wiebe gets the point across and it goes, I think, one of a couple different ways:

One: Shane HATES this information and tries to memory hole it immediately. Shane has had a complicated psychosexual attachment to every hockey coach he’s ever had, which is fine because hockey coaches are straighter than God. Even though both Shane and Wiebe are in happily married monogamous relationships, finding out that it’s actually hypothetically possible for a coach to experience reciprocal attraction to him is the worst thing that’s ever happened.

Two: Finding out that Wiebe is bisexual pushes Shane over the edge into having a meta-textual breakdown. Shane: “It’s fucking ridiculous. It’s absurd! We’re already the gayest team in the league. The gay married team. And now we have a gay coach?” Ilya: “Lubimiy, he is bisexual, do not make me ask Harris to give another PowerPoint presentation on bisexual erasure.”

Three: Shane pours over stats from Detroit’s 2001 season and figures out who Wiebe’s teammate was in less than 60 minutes. 

[prideandprejudice]

#they know each other, you honor | (requested by anon)

[tiktaalic]

Cas was raised in a white room with only. Saltine crackers for thousands of years and then he was let loose on the. World discovering he was not. Only autistic but gay and his only. Point of reference for human behavior was dean winchester oh my god I’d be so mad. castiel was born in an AirPod case yesterday and his sister was going fall from heaven! Do it! You can kiss men if only you spurn everything you’ve ever known! And everyone he knew was calling her a traitorous wretch. Except for dean winchester who slept with her. AND then dean licked his lips called them thelma and Louise then sauntered directly into cas whil e he squinted into the middle distance trying to figure out what the hell that meant because he’s never seen a movie or experienced desire . So he has to decode dean winchester sentences of ALL things. While figuring out that hes gay and autistic. Dean winchester. Hammers. Now.

[castiellesbian]

remind me to reblog this when i turn 25

[gaynehollander]

We need to recentre the Scott Hunter virginity hoax because I'm now thinking about the amount of proposals he would have been getting in his DMs and through actual mail that his agent had to sort through and the amount of Christian housewives who told their daughters they needed to find a "nice boy like Scott Hunter", who does charity and is waiting for marriage, while secretly flicking their bean to his ad shoots after their husband failed to find the clit for the 20th year running, and the deep sense of betrayal these women would feel when they find out that he is not the Lord-loving-boy he claimed to be and is, in fact, engaging in sodomy (gasp)

[twirlingfreckles]

In like 2013 or so, word gets out that Scott Hunter is a virgin and he’s waiting for marriage (this is absolutely not true, it’s a rumor he started to explain why he isn’t having sex) and a week later Ilya Rozanov (an established womanizer) tells the press that he’s also a virgin, and won’t someone take pity on him and take him to bed? And then he winks at the camera. And then he texts Shane a link to this clip on YouTube

[perlukafarinn]

Canon divergent AU where Shane is a little more paranoid and when Hayden first comments on "Boston Lily", he decides he has to do something to break up the pattern and make it not so noticeable that he's got someone on Boston.

Not seeing Rozanov is not an option, so instead Shane picks out a few other cities to regularly go out by himself in. He'll go for a long walk, maybe sit down somewhere for a drink, and then catch a taxi back to the hotel an appropriate amount of time later. It's honestly pretty nice, unwinding by himself in this way, and now disappearing after games is not a thing specific to Boston! It's just another strange Hollander quirk!

Unfortunately, he fails to account for the guys on the team jumping on the most obvious explanation for all these disappearances, which is that Shane now has a girl in every port.

Word about this starts to spread quick, because it is so out of character for Shane, and pretty soon half the league is under the impression that he's some secret playboy.

Ilya is extremely not chill about this rumor.

[perlukafarinn]

@scunthotter

help 😭😭 ilya's playing 4d chess to keep his man to himself and meanwhile shane's like "it's so nice having ilya with me on my little walks 🥰"

[unwastelandunbaby]

thinking david corenswet is hot is the most embarrassing reputation ruining annoying thing I could have done tbh like ohhh my god really? tall big muscles dark hair and blue eyes kind man is hot? god fucking really. are you fucking stupid I hate myself. oh you think superman is hot? fucking superman? groundbreaking type shit going on here oh my god he’s tall should we tell everyone he’s tall and his jaw is nice wow she thinks the attractive man is attractive. you and everyone else. is pizza your favorite food too. fuck you. everyone look at her she thinks SUPERMAN is hot boundaries are really being pushed over here should we get her a medal because she thinks Mr Smile is easy on the eyes. “hear me out” and it’s a fucking marching band. should we call people magazine. vanilla. I DISGUST myself. summer blockbuster. I should be killed

[ladamania]

(via @divorce-enjoyer)

[finalgirldean]

Trying to track down if Jensen ackles can read and I found this interview which has led me to 1. The conclusion of deans hair colour 2. The fact that jared definitely hasn’t read a book since high school and 3. Well

[finalgirldean]

4. Jensen #1 dean kinnie

[perfecting-teleportation]

oh my god just found out this is from a j2 fic

[casgirl]

How it felt watching metatron say “he’s in love………with humanity” in 2014

[bambicoded]

it's important to me that ilya remains captain of the centaurs after shane joins, but i have a specific picture in my mind of shane being assistant captain and being generally harmless and super chill , so the centaurs see him as like the chill parent (something to be said about shane being content in letting someone else, specifically His Someone, have the reins and enjoying not being in charge) but then ilya has to be out for a few weeks for like health or smth so shane goes into Captain Mode and the centaurs are scared shitless by how intense he gets all of a sudden. the most intense drills of all time. the hardest plays they've ever heard of. the strictest practices on earth. and they suddenly understand why shane led the metros/voyagers to victory so many times and why ilya treats him like the boss in their relationship. and then as soon as ilya comes back he turns it off and the centaurs are like Oh Thank Fuck Because What The Hell Was That

[blacksheepcolorfulskin]

WHY IS THIS SO GOOD?!

[the-ladyrae]

They put drugs in this show, and this edit is the closest I've come to being able to snort it like cocaine. Excluding binging the entire show in 6 hours after first turning on episode one to see what all the fuss was about.

[shed-some-light]

they're doing hella journalism on tiktok. the top songs of the billboard charts at key moments in the show.

link

[haedraulics]

final boss of parental neglect ilya rozanov

[perfecting-teleportation]

i wish more people understood hindi so they could see the desi edits to heated rivalry. generational shitposting. also the most devastating song edits.