Someone not so clever

Han or Ham. Genderfluid (she/they) bisexual who's almost 3 decades old and still figuring it out. Melancholic & INTJ. Married! if I like it I reblog it, and i like a lot of things.

[t00thpasteface]

sorry to everyone out there who thinks they have the funniest tshirt but i think i can confidently say i just saw the actual funniest tshirt just now. i passed by a beautiful black woman with long multicolor braids blowing majestically in the beach breeze & she was wearing an oversized tshirt that said in gigantic letters "WHITE BOY OF THE YEAR"

[dilffussy]

just saw the funniest thing on twitter where someone was broken up with bc they ate 7 croissants im CRYINGGGG

[dilffussy]

[kosmogrl]

[chaoticneutralwife]

the next day after exerting myself too much because i felt good for once

[chipper-smol]

How would you describe a dragon to someone who has never seen a dragon?

[chipper-smol]

"Horse but make it a lizard and give it bat wings and horns"

didnt know how to interpret "make it a lizard" so i wrote lizard and drew an arrow pointing to the horse so people know its a lizard. Also didn't know what bat horns were so I gave it a horned bat nose

"A body like a big cat but completely covered in scales, the head of a crocodile with the horns of an ibex, and the wings of a bat on its back"

On it boss o7, ive mashed all these animals together and threw scales all over it. This the dragon you saw?

"Take a lizard, extend the neck. Add a pair of bat wings to the back. Add horns and sharp teeth."

Seems like we're onto somethin' boss! Though idk how it'd be so fearsome bein such a small thing.

"Big-ass lizard with wings" "big lizard" "Giant lizard" "Big fucking lizard"

don't seem too special?

"Imagine a winged alligator that was 70 feet tall and aware of its existence"

i dont know if this is a dragon but it could definitely be some kind of god

"Dinosaur with wings and horns?"

Dunno which dino you were talkin about so i just picked a random one. Stegosauus :}

"Big snake with legs and horns that can breathe fire"

Ah. Hm.

"A dragon is like a tree, in that it's a made up category for a broadly similar type of mythological creature that has no relationship to other dragons, but you know a dragon when you see one the way you know a tree when you see one."

[caspercryptid]

I feel like not enough people realize that people under enormous strain act really really fucking Weird

[withoutideas]

There was a parenting-kids-with-trauma book I remember running into around 2010 (I was not and am still not a parent, but I am an older sibling) that had a lovely little slogan I like to quote all the time:

“It’s not about the Cheerios.”

This was in reference to a story about a kid flipping the HELL out into a full-blown panic about running out of their favorite cereal. Not a tantrum, not a whine-fest, but an all-hands-on-deck, code-red, world-is-ending blowup.

The kid had originally come from a very unstable situation and experienced food deprivation. The new adoptive parents were stumped, because look at all the other food! You’re safe! We can get the Cheerios tomorrow!

But it wasn’t really about the Cheerios, it was about that first flicker of unease triggering all the old trauma. From the outside, it looked ridiculous. To the trauma-trained reaction of the kid’s brain, it made perfect sense.

Human brains are weird, and we’re all out here trying to survive. Sometimes our brains do this in socially acceptable, convenient ways. But not often.

(The book was titled “Beyond Logic, Consequences or Control” I think, I’ll look it up and edit this in a bit.)

[gracefree]

Hyena Pup by send2prashant_mali

[stranglerfigpudding]

[wolfie-barks]

[dubiousculturalartifact]

The new Odyssey adaptation has inevitably gotten people talking about a Muppet version of it, and they’re frequently suggesting Kermit as Odysseus, Miss Piggy as Penelope.

I’m sorry but that’s thinking way too small, hear me out:

We need to have Miss Piggy as Odysseus, and Kermit as Penelope.

Think about it… who’s the more fickle, prideful, warlike one in that relationship? Who is absolutely ready to go ham, at a moment’s notice?

It ain’t Kermit

[anyroads]

Miss Piggy tied to the mast while Statler and Waldorf heckle her from the sea

[mindovermuses]

But who is the single human cast member in this tale? Who gets to put in an Oscar-worthy performance alongside the Muppets and what role are they to play?

[muffinflarp69]

There’s no single human, everyone is a Muppet except for one scene. Circe, played by Janice, turns Odysseus’s crew into humans who still behave animalistic and are all played by Academy Award winning actors.

[unprettyextra]

Game Devs Start Worker Hardship Fund For Laid Off Colleagues

Proceeds from a 100+ game bundle will go toward the fund.

[unpretty]

here’s the bundle, it’s $10 and there’s some good ones in there

[mmmarty]

listen if no one else writes this im gonna have to do it and the problem with me having to do it is that im gonna have to do it. 

[spaceshipsandpurpledrank]

[punissuer]

ID / TL;DW: young Black man explains the history of voodoo dolls: they originated in England, where Black people where prohibited from learning to read or write, to help witches keep track of what ailed their patients. Eg., person goes to witch and laments headache, they treat their headache and make a small doll (called "poppet"), trying to represent them as good as possible, stick a needle in its head and put it up a shelf. When they return next week, the witch takes their poppet and asks about their headache. If it's gone, they remove the needle, otherwise they know they have to treat a rather persistent headache.

[tartrazeen]

I'm just gonna freeze-frame this for everybody:

[mousidy]

I really would like to not be treated like my body makes me dangerous

[noze2222]

This is a huge issue for transfems even amongst so-called "progressive" people. Saw someone claim that a trans woman "weaponized their AGAB strength" the other day and if that doesn't speak volumes about how we're perceived by the queer community at large I don't know what does

[fairycosmos]

i noticed my horrible patterns! i think the process stops there

[queerspacepunk]

not to be all "these two words will change your life" or whatever, but I promise you, programming in "good catch!" as your response to people correcting you/pointing out errors or whatever removes so much friction from interactions, and comes with a delightful happy meal toy of "not hating yourself so much for making mistakes"

[madgastronomer]

I use "I stand corrected" a lot. The mild silliness of the outdated language makes it work for me.

[knitmeapony]

I had a high school science teacher who would say "if you admit you're wrong and change your mind..." and the whole class would respond back "... you aren't wrong anymore!"

And when a kid would assert something incorrect In class, he wouldn't tell them they were wrong, he would help lead them to the right answer and then when they admitted/ accepted the new information, he'd say "now we're both right! Nice work!"

For a bunch of gifted kids whose identity and reputation often was staked on knowing more than most people, it was a great safety valve. No shame in making a mistake, because if you accept it you have learned! Now you are smarter! It always made me feel better.

[themoonandmyman]

therapy should just be One Session where they just slough off all the Goo and then you’re done. Will someone please take my Goo

[parkchanwoohoo]

[power-chords]

[organicmatter]

i fucking love when halloween music is just surf rock with a ghoul laughing in the background