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I was one of the 1.7 million children homeschooled in the USA.
I am also one of Homeschool's Invisible Children.
I was heavily restricted at home - I was barred from nearly everything that my peers were connecting with. I had incredibly limited access to movies and TV, even more restricted internet access, and was even barred from many of the same toys my peers played with. This on top of my academic isolation made socializing very hard.
I didn't relate to my peers socially.
Children younger than me were more academically advanced than me.
I was socially unaware, and frequently missed jokes or made faux pas comments because I didn't understand how to interact with peers.
My ADHD went untreated my entire childhood.
And the issues were not only social. Despite living in a state that boasted some of the most rigorous checks for homeschooled students, I was missed. My portfolios every year were falsified - much of what they claimed I had learned I had little to no understanding of.
By the time I graduated high school "with honors" (that I did not earn and were entirely false), this is a brief list of some of my academic failings:
I had never written an essay, and did not know how
I did not know how to do a critical analysis of a piece of text or media
I was incapable of math above a 4th/5th grade level
I could not tell time on an analog clock
I could not identify more than ~5 states on a map of the United States
I could not identify more than ~5 countries on a map of the world/globe
I could not spell above a ~6th grade level
I did not know that there was proof of life on earth prior to dinosaurs
I did not know that the lymphatic system was real
And so much more.
I entered college woefully unequipped for both the academic and socal demands that were placed on me. At 18, I was closer to as 14 year old, social/emotionally. Academically I was much worse.
I had to work three times as hard as my peers to achieve the same results, battled my still-undiagnosed ADHD as well as my academic and social neglect.
I didn't fully know who I even was as a person, due to spending so many years being expected to fit a specific ideal that was enforced upon me 24/7 through the isolation of homeschooling.
This April 30th, I'm wearing green for Homeschool's Invisible Children - for children like me.
If you are a child experiencing homeschool neglect, please know that you are not alone. There are resources available to you, and your future is not doomed just because your guardians failed to educate you. I'm listing some resources below that may be of help to you.
Homeschool alumni/survivors who resonate with this story: we deserved better. We deserved education. We deserved freedom. It's okay if you're angry at your past. It's okay if you're grieving the life you might have had without homeschooling. It's okay if you're conflicted. I hope you're able to find closure and healing in whatever form that means for you.
And, because I know it unfortunately needs to be said, if you're an ex-homeschooler or a homeschool parent who feels the need to jump on this post and defend yourself, I need you to step back, sit down, delete your comment, and sit with why you feel so attacked by our truth.
This is not a personal attack on you - this is abuse survivors speaking up to prevent further abuse. It is not your place to tell us we should be silent.
"But homeschoolers test better and are more successful!" I'm sure you're dying to say. To wave your statistics at me.
And you would be wrong. Because here's the problem with those statistics.
Let's pretend we have ten homeschooled children and ten public schooled children.
All ten of the public schooled children take a school assessment. Because some excel at different things than others, the public school students average out to an 85.
Only four of the homeschooled children take the assessment. Of the other six, one is traveling with their family during the assessment, two are not permitted because their parents know they aren't up to grade level and fear backlash or judgement, two are mentally or physically disabled and so their parents don't feel the test will adequately display their knowledge, and the last hasn't received any kind of education in years because their parents keep them at home either doing chores, working a job, caring for siblings, or they are simply neglected and spend all day hungry and scared.
Of the four homeschooled children that do take the assessment, they do quite well, as their parents knew/suspected they would. Their average score is a 98.
A 98 is better than an 85, yes. But just because 4 out of 6 homeschooled children were above the public school average does not mean homeschooling is automatically better. If you tested the top four public school students, they might very well score a 98 as well.
However, if you included those other six homeschooled students, the average homeschool score would very likely be something closer to a 45.
So when we talk about Homeschool's Invisible Children, we're talking about those six that never got the chance to take an assessment. Those six who never had a chance to tell a teacher "I'm ten and I don't know how to read". Those six who may not even realize how far behind their peers they are. Those six who deserved to have access to supports so that they could learn in ways that actually met their needs.
So while your statistics look good on paper, they are not honest. They do not present the full picture of homeschooling. Listen to the homeschool survivors who were one of those six kids who never got to make their voices heard. We have a voice now - don't try and take it from us.
Resources for current homeschool students and alumni:
Khan Academy - basically free online self paced K-12 classes. They have fantastic explanation videos for the lessons, you can review them whenever you want, and you don't have to stay in the same grade level for every subject - great if you're trying to catch up and you're in 6th grad for English but 2nd for math. They have courses besides just core classes (math/english/science/etc), too! They run on donations, but it's completely free to use. Also, this site is used in my local public school system to supplement the existing curriculum, so it's not just for homeschoolers!
Learn for free about math, art, computer programming, economics, physics, chemistry, biology, medicine, finance, history, and more. Khan Aca
Coalition for Responsible Home Education - actively fighting for more oversight and restrictions on homeschooling in the USA. They mostly do awareness and advocacy, but they also have resources on their site for things like what to do if you don't have a high school transcript. They run on donations, but the information is freely available.
Probably the most famous resource on this list. Videos that give you a "crash course" (aka a condensed overview) of a wide variety of topics. These are best used as supplement to more structured lessons like Khan Academy, but they have a lot of merit on their own if they're all you can manage. Knowing a bit about something is better than knowing nothing about it!
At Crash Course, we believe that high-quality educational videos should be available to everyone for free!
Subscribe for weekly videos fro
the real challenge of adulthood that no one tells you about in advance is how many goddamn pieces of paper you have to keep up with that are never important until they are suddenly VERY important
psa cause i’m seeing WAY too many people saying “ow taking off trans tape hurts so bad” “it’s peeling my skin/leaving abrasions” etc etc
TAKING OFF TRANS TAPE SHOULD NOT HURT
as someone who has incorrectly taken it off multiple times before to the point where it left huge red patches, blistering, and sometimes even bleeding: TAKE YOUR TRANS TAPE OFF CORRECTLY!!!
so here’s my guide as someone who’s been wearing it for around 2 years now, pretty much daily.
it takes time to do it correctly. it’s very time consuming and requires a lot of patience which is why i often wear tape for 5-7 days at a time instead of the recommended 3-4 days, because the removal process takes takes so fucking long. for me it can take around 15-20 minutes, however i do use 3 layers while some people might use 2.
you have to slather your tape in oil. like soak that shit. even if you think it’s enough oil, it’s not enough oil. oil up. you need more oil.
i recommend peeling from the corners first rather than just peeling from any old side. (if you round out the edges of your tape with scissors this doesn’t really apply).
pull SLOWLY. SLOWLY!!! yanking hard will leave abrasions and irritate your skin no matter how lubricated the tape itself is. it’s not like ripping off a bandaid. especially considering breasts are a generally pretty sensitive area. so always tug very slowly.
it should not hurt. it should not hurt. IT SHOULD NOT HURT!!! it’s perfectly normal for it to pinch a little bit, be itchy, or be uncomfortable, but actual stinging pain means you’re doing something wrong. usually because you’re pulling too fast or too hard or you didn’t use enough oil. if it starts to sting or hurt when you’re removing it, let go and apply more oil to the area.
massaging the edges of the tape and areas that you’re peeling from will loosen it a lot. ive found this to be particularly helpful when you start, so i usually apply slightly more oil to the borders and edges of the tape, so that the beginning removal is painless.
be careful around the areas under your arm - like sideboob areas. since trans tape pulls your breasts to the side rather than flattening them in front, if you remove it too harshly, it can cause severe abrasions where the boob has been pulled it to the side. it’s NOT fun and is painful pretty much every time you raise your arms etc. so be very careful and patient with those areas.
always wear nipple covers. this is a given but just in case anyone out there is going to be stupid: do NOT apply it directly over your nipples. the skin there is extremely delicate and it will get damaged even if you’re extremely careful. use nipple covers.
above all, be patient. it is a time consuming process and can be annoying or uncomfortable, but don’t rush. it is not worth it!! it is NOT fun to walk around with your boob areas stinging and irritated!! and it can make future trans tape application more difficult!! so give yourself ample time to do it.
good luck and i hope this helps ! stop taking off your trans tape incorrectly friends
You can learn more about the fediverse and mastodon here:
https://fedi.tips/
In a nutshell, instead of one massive site where everyone signs up, like tumblr, facebook, instagram, x, etc, it's a series of smaller sites (called instances) that are all connected.
A good place to sign up is blorbo.social or eldritch.cafe (also have made some wonderful friends over at cooltrans.men.
We have free binders and are friendly:
An offer of new binders
We also do old binder give aways:
Free used binders
other benefits
There are no ads.
servers can be hosted in more data privacy friendly locations like the EU
still uses hashtags like it's tumblr or old twitter
The moderation is done by the community and not a faceless corporation. You can chat directly with the moderators of any instance.
nazis can be blocked easier, because you can block entire domains full of nazis at once.
if you don't like your instance, you can move and take your followers and people you follow with you to the new instance.
custom emojis
cozy community
alt text on about 70-75% of images (100% depending on the instance rules)
instances centered around specific stuff like fandoms, or gardening, or tech, being trans or whatever you want
Also, *ahem*, some us of really like BG3 and could use more fandom friends. If you need help, let me know.
I recently started taping instead if binding and it's unbelievably gender affirming like what the fuck it's amazing.
I don't even really mean the flattening affect because of course that's gender affirming if I want a flat chest (which I do) I mean just like. How it looks. I love my trans identity, I love my queer identity. And this just makes me REALLY feel trans. It makes me feel completely and truly connected with my community and the people before me. I don't know. I love it.
Because also I've never really hated my overall body shape, I quite like it. I often feel more affirmed looking at my naked torso than with a binder or bra because I genuinely like my shape and it's gender affirming for me, it's just that my chest looks a teeny bit off. It just looks like it shouldn't be there, while a bra or binder feels even more off putting to me because wearing something to cover it feels weird, it feels like it should just be bare.
And taping feels that way. Yes technically it's covering a part of my chest but it's also out and open. I feel like I can have my shirt off and be comfortable and I WANT to look at myself. I feel sexy and I feel desirable.
And some of you may not have heard this peak of human culture, but... just after Twitter purchase by Elon Musk got confirmed, a bunch of (serious) journalist put together a Twitter Space (a live audio streaming where any of the attendees can ask to participate) about what was going to happen next, and ... @tumblr joined. And... they invited tumblr to speak. I can't describe how much joy this moment brought me and how fucking proud made me of being part of our little entropy generator here:
Journalist 1: Um just real quick, Tumblr is now with us. Tumblr, uh, uh-
Journalist 2: Hi, tumblr!
Journalist 3: Oh my god
Journalist 2: Tuh-tuhmn-tumblr can you talk t-uh about Katie's phone predicament? We're trying to get to the bottom of it.
Journalist 3: Tumblr-
Journalist 1: (laughs) Yeah. oh, this is so cruel
Journalist 3: You gotta unmute yourself.
Journalist 1: You come on this space and you won't speak to me, tumblr?
Tumblr: [the babiest voice imaginable] Hewwo? Hello?
Journalist 2: ah
Journalist 3: OH GOD. Are you using a voice change-? Okay, is this Tumblr?
Tumblr: hi, this is tumblr dot com, the app and website :3
Journalist 1 + 3: [laughter]
Journalist 2: [?] speak again, I don't think this is the {...} exactly what we sounded like
Journalist 2: [wheezing laughter]
Journalist 1: [cackling]
Journalist 3: Can you tell me, how you doin' right now?
Tumblr: uh, well, we have a lot of, lot of new, new people, um, right now on tumblr
Journalist 2: [coughing laughter]
Tumblr: Tumblr dot com the app (.) and website.
Journalist 1: I feel like this is like. Oh god, this is awful, Brian, what's the acronym of like, like- you know what I'm talking about, like... L G.... Um, like, little girl-? Like
Journalist 2: Are you talking about DDLG? Yeah I'm not going to define that but you can google that if you want.
Journalist 1: That is like an embodiment of this
Journalist 3: Hey, so tumblr, how are you doing with all the people coming from twitter over to your app and website right now?
Tumblr: Oh my goodness. It is so busy.
[pause]
Journalist 3: [laugh cough] that's great. Um, what do you think is the biggest thing that Twitter users should know before they join Tumblr?
Tumblr: Well. It's a different kind of landscape, but everyone is definitely welcome.
That's great. That's super great.
Journalist 5: Would you let Elon Musk join the platform?
[pause]
Tumblr: I'm sorry, you kind of cut out a little bit, what did you say?
[laughter]
Journalist 5: Sorry, that is Twitter's fault, would you let Elon Musk join the platform [?]
Tumblr: There's like a buzzing? I can't really-?
Journalist 5: Sorry, that's a part of being Australian, I'll stop now.
That's fine tumblr, thank you, that's great. What's a big thing on tumblr that people might be curious about, what's big on your app and-?
[audio ends]
