things that are never mentioned ever in supernatural now but had major psychological impact on sam:
- he watched his girlfriend (potential fiancée) burn to death (and he had nightmares about it in the first couple episodes of s1 and probably still to this day)
- he was forced to watch so many people die through his premonitions
- especially during the first couple seasons, he was constantly seen as a freak/monster (hunted by gordon, immune to croatoan virus, bullied by dean)
- meg used his body to assault the hunter, jo, and dean
- he had to shoot the first girl he opened up to romantically since jess’s death
- he carries the weight of dean’s demon deal and blames himself (and had to watch as his brother was ripped to shreds)
- HE!! HAD! TO!! WATCH!! HIS!! BROTHER!! DIE!! OVER!! 100!! TIMES!! IN!! MYSTERY!! SPOT!!
- he was on drugs and depressed and suicidal and basically a full-time alcoholic while dean was dead
- ruby (someone he trusted!!) manipulated him into becoming an addict and breaking the last seal (which he entirely blames himself for) (even though dean broke the first seal in hell) (and he was only in hell because HE made the crossroads deal)
- a ghoul who looked like adam, his newly found brother, sliced his arms open like he was an animal (this was LITERALLY never mentioned again)
- sam’s detox is almost never mentioned and it was extremely emotionally and physically painful
- lucifer is generally seen as evil, right? well sam was told that he is lucifer’s perfect vessel and he believes that he is inherently evil bc of this
- in ‘swap meat’ gary used sam’s body to have sex
- sam has to live with all of the people his soulless body hurt (and dean berated him the entire season for not having a soul) (which wasn’t his fault in any way, shape, or form)
- cas, someone else that he trusted, broke the wall in his head causing hallucinations of his centuries in lucifer’s cage
- non con with becky. i don’t have to say anything else.
- his lucifer hallucinations tortured him to the point of refusing to sleep and eat… he was in a mental hospital for crying out loud!!!!!
- the first girl he kissed after jess was killed was killed by crowley
- THEY NEVER TALK ABOUT THE TRIALS WHICH LITERALLY LED SAM TO SAY “SO?” WHEN HE WAS TOLD THAT HE’S GONNA DIE
- AND WHEN DO THEY DISCUSS GARDEEL NOW?? never!!!! dean tricked sam into accepting a being into him that he KNEW sam wouldn’t say “yes” to because of his past experience with lack of autonomy.
- and gadreel used sam’s body to kill people, including kevin who they thought of as a brother (and sam has said that he wakes up seeing his hands killing kevin)
- sam was willing to die when cas was extracting grace
- sam refused to give up dean’s location at the beginning of s10 to cole, even though dean was a demon
- SAM WAS TORTURED BY COLE. WHY IS THIS NEVER BROUGHT UP???
- sam was verbally abused by demon! dean (i know dean was a demon but sam was visibly shaken when he was talking about mary)
- once again, sam was willing to die in ‘the werther project’ and basically slit his own wrist
- sam obviously vomited after seeing charlie’s dead body
- dean wouldn’t even allow sam to speak at charlie’s funeral and was told that he should be the dead one
- sam was brutally beaten by his brother in “brother’s keeper” and was ONCE AGAIN ready to die
- sam was sick with the darkness virus at the beginning of s11 and cured himself + other infected people WITHOUT ANYBODY’S HELP
- sam willingly approached lucifer for help with amara, despite being tortured for centuries
- SAM WAS TORTURED FOR SEVERAL DAYS AT THE BEGINNING OF S12 (INCLUDING NON CON) and then worked with his abuser for the remainder of the season
- *whispers* and sam being killed by the vamp at the end of s13 will probably not be mentioned again :’))))))
