Crazy Works

The risk I took was calculated.. But man... Am I bad at math

[puddingdemon]

Sooo I’m painting a desk I found and I just finished my newest addition of the friendship squad!

[huffy-the-bicycle-slayer]

I haven't seen dancing pumpkin guy ONCE this year, are you guys okay?

[huffy-the-bicycle-slayer]

FINE! I'll do it myself

[huffy-the-bicycle-slayer]

Why did 12 people reblog this today??? IT IS ONLY AUGUST!!!

[dovewithscales]

It's September now

[bastard-unlimited]

it took me like a full minute to realise that this was a post that was blocked with my own tumblr filters and not that “this post may contain reddit and american” was the funny post I was like wtf why can’t I reblog this

[lindendragon]

Why do you have that blacklisted in the first place? Seems oddly specific

[bastard-unlimited]

because I hate americans and redditors next question

[fairycrowbar]

Don’t wanna be an American Redditor

[shittyreblogville]

[cloevr]

when i take my phone case off i feel concern and fear knowing that some people just rawdog their phone like that like its so slippery girl you are carrying around a little fish

[dankmemeuniversity]

[spyderqueen]

May I recommend...

Paste em on, x-acto em out. Make em reusable!

Examples:

[nuttysaladtree]

Thread summary until I have more energy for image descriptions: if you or an acquaintance don't know where to stick a sticker, you can convert them into magnets with magnetic adhesive sheets. /end summary

[sharkgirldick]

So what makes a butcher knife more butch than other knives?

[nature-nerd-sarah]

The knife itself isn't necessarily butch. It's named that because it's wielded by a butcher, who is more butch than the other food shop owners

[sharkgirldick]

Hmm, I see.

What, then, makes the butcher more butch than other food shop owners?

[dragongirlbunny]

the knife

[academicblorbo]

That's what ancient Greek philosophy is like

[hotvampireadjacent]

Ok

[sarkos]

I'm at the combination Play Area & Cholera Burial Ground

[victusinveritas]

[pleatedjeans]

35 Funny Test Fails From Students Who Got The Answers Wrong But Nailed The Humor

[pansyfemme]

born to be a bitchy gay forced to lie at night convinced im a horrible person because i said something that came off as kind of rude that one time

[deadnow-deactivated20250507]

yeah well. I'll jump off that bridge when I come to it.

[cher3pakhi]

just remember, one day you're going to open tumblr and the crabs will be raving like they never have before

[cannibalchicken]

[psychoticallytrans]

If a worker who isn't the owner says ANYTHING similar to "I'm not really supposed to do this but-" and then does something that helps you, under no circumstances inform the business, including through reviews. You tell them that the worker was polite, professional, the very model of customer service and why you like to go there. You do not breathe a word of the rulebreaking.

[steampunktomboy]

Employee-customer solidarity

[dykepuffs]

Even if they don't- Your review can be the thing that wrecks someone up accidentally;

"Janie was so helpful when I wanted to buy a new washing machine on Friday, she stayed with me for half an hour and wasn't pushy at all, we had a good laugh about our cats' silly antics and she got Adam and Suzy to carry it to the car for me- 10/10 excellent service, I'd come back any day!"

-But Management has a policy that workers should spend no more than 10 focused minutes on any customer at a time, and that they should always try to upsell the insurance and the higher price model, so Janie was breaking policy.

-And they aren't supposed to have their phones on the sales floor, so now Janie is going to be quizzed on whether she was showing photos of her cat to a customer.

-Adam is a warehouse worker and shouldn't have been in the front-of-house at all, Suzy is a porter, and store policy is both to use a trolley to move heavy items, and that only the porters should do it, so now Janie is in trouble for pulling Adam off-task, Adam is in trouble for walking through the shop floor, and Suzy is in trouble for poor handling procedure. Maybe the store even has a paid delivery service that Janie was supposed to upsell as soon as you said "I can't put this in my car without help", so this was all against policy.

Your review should always be as bland as possible, "10/10, five star service, will shop here again, thank you to Janie at the Town Street branch" You NEVER know what was technically a rule-break, capitalism is not your friend, the review process is part of the panopticon.

FIVE STARS, TEN OUT OF TEN, VERY GOOD, NOTHING MORE.

[yardsards]

surrounding myself with a bubble of diversity and self love and body positivity online and then being exposed to normies who actually care about conventional beauty standards feels so fucking bizarre. like you people just live like this??? are you not tired???

[viralfrog]

[wizardlyghost]

[savemeimgay]

not to be a slut but i would love to sleep next to someone