Can't Shake The Noise From Their Bones

Devin, 20, I like music and stupid funny things

[3840293843293-deactivated202211]

why does disney own Winnie the pooh? I don’t like that. I think Winnie the pooh should be in the public domain

[harveyxspecter]

[thenatsdorf]

[baetology]

Stop letting your heart and your pussy choose your men.

[trapbinch]

I’m confused, what is left…

[trapbinch]

Oh nvm lmao my brain. You right sis lol you is right

[baetology]

You really forgot your whole brain.

[pussylipgloss]

she read this post with her pussy

[skywalker-of-tatooine]

Last night I had a dream that I was invited to some kind of sith or empire dinner party and after I got there I ended up wandering into the kitchen and Palpatine was straight up cooking a chicken with force lightning

[geistygeist]

The Dark Side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be…unnatural.

[vampireapologist-archive-deacti]

ppl are so annoying “you can’t paint ur bedroom pink you’re an adult” i did not spend my entire life waiting to grow up and control my life to paint my bedroom beige

[hojolove]

I had a sales woman in furniture store try and tell me not to buy a hot bubblegum pink loveseat because she wanted me to “think about the future”

Bitch, I am thinking about the future. I already got a hot bubblegum pink couch at home and now I need a loveseat to go with it.

[madgastronomer]

when I first bought my house, I announced my decision to paint my bedroom purple. I had wanted a purple bedroom for thirty damn years, you fucking bet I was gonna have one now. My friends decided, for some reason, that I meant what one of them referred to as “14 year old girl purple” (through what’s wrong with the colors a 14 year old girl chooses, I don’t know, even if they’re not what I want as an adult). They didn’t believe me until they saw the color on the actual wall, even thought they helped me pick out paints. My mother, meanwhile, decided to get worried that if I painted my bedroom a “dark purple”, it would be “depressing”. As if, with an entire house to live in, I would spend all my time in the bedroom, which I wanted to be dark because I would be sleeping in there. In the damn dark.

I had like one, maybe two friends who were all like FUCK YEAH YOU PAINT IT WHATEVER COLOR YOU WANT, PURPLE BEDROOMS ARE AWESOME.

But when they actualy saw the finished bedroom, every single one of them was like, “Oh yeah, that’s really pretty.” (Well, the ones who supported me from the beginning were more like WOOHOO.)

And the moral of the story is: Fuck ‘em, please yourself. Either they’ll come around, or you can safely ignore every question of taste they opine about for the rest of time.

[themintycupcake]

This applies to other adulting activities, too. When I was a kid, I decided that I wanted to have a wedding cake made of doughnuts. When I got older, I figured that I would be “mature” about it and get a traditional cake, which the older adults approved of. Now that I’m 25 and facing the possibility of actual marriage in the near future, I’m just like “marriage is a social construct but it comes with tax & insurance benefits, so just give me that goddamn doughnut cake.” If they don’t like it then they don’t have to come to my wedding.

[aridotdash]

https://xkcd.com/150/

[undanewneon]

I would like you all to view my office. I’m thirty and my rainbow room is awesome, people can fight me

[spuffybot]

I’m thirty and my first big furniture purchase was a custom coffin shaped coffee table that opens up and is lined with purple crushed velvet. I would have loved it at 13 and I love it now. Growing up doesn’t mean you have to abandon what makes you happy.

[idareu2bme]

GROWING UP DOESN’T MEAN YOU HAVE TO ABANDON WHAT MAKES YOU HAPPY.

[tzifron]

[dittohasadhd]

that’s not to say it’s the entire root, but social and economic factors are a major contributor.

[tenderlesbian-deactivated201807]

SOS I told the girl I like that I want a butch gf and she said "I'm butch" and I got really flustered and went to go make dinner for us (bc I'm at her place tonight)

uhh are you sure y’all arent on a date right now?

[tenderlesbian-deactivated201807]

i don’t even know what to say

[closet-keys]

This is the most lesbian thing I’ve ever read

[isnt]

follow @isnt​ for more memes

[myinnerlandscape]

[fuzzypetal]

What if that was your house What if a sheep lives off the grass on your house

[saltymommie]

Shes my landlord

[oldersistercore]

lamblord

[omruc]

What kind of boys do you like

i don’t actually like boys i’m just attracted to them

[ripe]

[senorcyborg]

This is the larval stage of a Funko Pop.

[hexpress]

insult the good name of axlotls once again and not even allah will be able to protect you from the fury of my shoe to your head

[hyrude]

you fuckinng dumbasses are wearing glasses during sex?

am i expected to find the g spot by echolocation? 

[newtgeiszler]

you looking inside the pussy with your eyes? you crawling in there like antman?

[rytfujgkuhhgmjgh]

actually the best part of the lotr cast commentary is getting to hear about sir ian mckellen’s gay agenda

[rytfujgkuhhgmjgh]

i phrased this as a joke because it is pretty funny but its also worth reading what he said:

IAN: When I suggested to Sean that he took Elijah’s hand it was because I thought anyone who knew the book would care about the deep friendship, often of an innocently physical nature, and that might’ve been missed by two resolutely heterosexual actors who mightn’t appreciate that gay people like myself saw in a touch something perhaps more meaningful than others might. So to persuade him to touch Elijah, I’d say, “Well look, it’s in the book.”

[Sean & Elijah in a separate recording] SEAN: Ian brought the book to me right before we shot it and he said, “Now look here, it says that Sam runs over and grabs Frodo’s hand,” he said. “The fans of the book are going to want to see that.” I sort of—I believed it, and I got a fan letter the other day that a neighbor friend handed to me, and it said how much it meant to her that Sam holds Frodo’s hand at that moment because it was something that she—it was one of the most important moments to her in the book. ELIJAH: Oh, that’s fantastic. It’s those subtle little nuances, man. SEAN: So thank you Ian. ELIJAH: That’s unbelievable.

[pansexual-pied-piper]

The gay agenda is accurate screen adaptions. Also homoerotic subtext.

[omghotmemes]

Friday the 13th

[kairibloodheart]

The last Friday the 13th on this decade will also give us the last full moon of the decade btw

[yassmines]

this literally made me laugh so hard it shooke my BRAIN

[yassmines]

god DAM babey u done stop me in m TRACKS i can smell ur dam FEET from HHHHHHH EEEEEEHEEEHOOHOOO i can smell ur dam FEET from HERE well look me n the patnurs goin down to the levi tpack some LIPS maybe go mudridin how bouchune y HHHHHHHHHHHH fat ass friend hop ina HHHHHHHHHHHHH 😂😂 hop inthe backs HH HHH HHH HEEEEEEE

[sam-i-am-27]

Wanna hear a shitty movie idea?

It’s a crime/comedy movie about two rivaling crime robbing syndicates trying to beat each other to the same deals. Pretty generic, right?

The twist is that they don’t really know anyone on the other side of the war and one day, the top agents go to steal the prize jewel, run into each other and end in a fight that results in their masks being taken off.

Turns out, the two groups are clones of each other and all the main ones are played by actors that are always confused because they look so similar.

Tom Hardy and Logan Marshal Green

Jeffery Dean Morgan and Javier Bardem

Amy Adams and Isla Fisher

Keira Knightly and Natalie Portman

The teams even have their own janitors/voice of reason!

Rupert Grint and Ed Sheeran

And, of course, the leader of both gangs and eventual main villain are Elijah Woods and Daniel Radcliffe.

[dancinbutterfly]

Someone tell Dan and Elijah. These assholes are the kind of tiny men who would make it happen and we all know it.