this blog is a museum of my heart

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@punkpillow
this blog is a museum of my heart
Imagine having been born in 1905... And all your life it doesn't fucking stop. The Great War, the Spanish Flu, and then you go out of your mind for 7 years. Everyone is traumatised and nothing matters. Then another crash. And then the rise of fascism, and the War to end all Wars didn't and it's 1945 and you're just about still there. You may have fought or ferried the boys from Dunkirk or sabotaged the Nazi occupiers or worked in the factories and put out fires during the Blitz and you're lucky to be alive, because not all your friends made it. But you are and finally, fucking finally, it stops. It stops. You are tough as nails and you can put that strength to work into building something and you do, and people have cars and can buy icecream and you have a pension fund and the kids have money of their own and no nightmares.
I want that for us. I so want that for us. I want to be the generation that has seen fucking everything and is like a MRSA bug and unfazed and when that Cheeto finally dies, I want us to. Plant the gardens and clean the seas because we can and we want to and we remember some joy, some time of trust even when it got broken and we can say to the 20 somethings "let us show you what we can build, how it can feel."
And maybe Gen beta will take it all for granted like the boomers did, but we can give Gen Z and Alpha some peace because we, and Gen Z and Alpha have seen the Dark Times and fuck that noise.
At the start of the Pandemic, my spouseās grandmother was in an assisted-living home, and of course they were severely locked down, because with no vaccination available and we donāt really know how it spreads and no tests and anyone over 80 is deffo gonna dieā¦. They couldnāt take the risks. So they werenāt even allowed to leave their rooms. Staff brought meals and left them outside the door, and they left dishes outside, and that was just their life for the foreseeable future.
So we tried to make sure someone called her every day, so she would have some kind of interaction, and one time my spouse asked how she was doing, and her attitude was basically, āYeah, this happens sometimes.ā
Because that was her life. She did live through the depression, she did lose three siblings to the last pandemic. She did live through WWII, and sent a son off to Vietnam, and made a family and a household and a career while knowing one slip of a button might wipe out all life on earth. And she lived through it; she survived.
And so 2020 wasnāt the end of the world, for her. It was just another thing. Because life is made up of sunshine and rainbows and puppy dogs, AND ALSO fascists and violence and rancid millionaires living high while people starve. And when you are in the middle of the shit times, you acknowledge that theyāre shit, and also that they are not exclusively shit, because they still include spring days and new flowers and people taking care of each other.
And it was just⦠a really helpful perspective to get. You can survive it, you can become strong enough to live to 103 despite everything, you can become a source of strength and joy for everyone around you.
I feel like a lot of people get "All Art is Political" confused with "All Art is made with Political Intentions" which is not the same.
āmust everything be homoeroticā no. but many things are, you will find
everything to think about, everything to notice
being a kid and hearing adults say stuff like "woah 2011 was 4 years ago haha" didn't really convey the fucking horror of a youtube video crossing my recommended labelled "9 years ago" and it's from 2017. that's not true. 9 years ago is 2010 or something. don't lie.
That is some fallout level environmental story telling XD
hate it when the people who I love are suffering due to circumstances beyond my control š there should be a sea monster that I can slay to fix the problem
nobody ever gets locked in a tower or chained to a rock at sea anymore - it's always some shit like chronic illness or ptsd related depression
some hyper famous artists like Van Gogh transcend overratedness and become underrated because they're so normalized. Like I'll look at a van Gogh and I'm like wait this really is amazing you guys don't get it
Shakespeare is like this
Every time I see a Van Gogh thatās not one of his better known pieces it absolutely blows me away
Have you seen this shit my liege? smh unreal
*Scrolls past*
*reluctant sigh*
*scrolls back up*
*rebogs*
I know the points been made, but god damn, Gideon must have been terrifying for most of Canaan House. She is this muscle bound mute wearing half assembled skull face paint and dark robes, often skulking around the building with her creepy necromancer out of sight. The first time anyone sees her duel she doesnāt seem to register this as a sport and instead just bodies the other cavalier. Sheās from a planet of weird monks and nuns who love bones and she is either so pious she took a vow of silence or care so little of everyone else that she simple has nothing to say. The moment things start to deteriorate amongst the various houses she and her necromancer are ready to tear shit up.
Then she opens her mouth and she is this dumbass jock who may only think about swords and boobs. 10/10 perfect character.
another objectively hilarious thing from gtn was that Harrow and Gideon were freaking out that someome will realise that Gideon isn't a real cavalier, that she has to use the rapier perfectly and not even think about her sword, that she has to be 100% obedient and loyal to Harrow and blah blah blah.
meanwhile Camilla also used the rapier only for show, Naberius and the twins were inches away from calling eachother stupid cunts and Protesilaus was literally a zombie
3 pm: god, I'm EXHAUSTED. going to bed early for SURE.
midnight: I Have Literally Never Been More Awake And Alert