fuck algebra i donāt need it just give me a dead body and iāll figure it out from there
i feel i should clarify i am a mortuary science major

titsay
taylor price
KIROKAZE
todays bird
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pixel skylines

gracie abrams
One Nice Bug Per Day

Jimmy Eat World
Doug Jones

if i look back, i am lost

Jar Jar Binks Fan Club
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
RMH
$LAYYYTER
d e v o n
sheepfilms
Aqua Utopiaļ½ęµ·ć®åŗć§čØę¶ćē“”ć

oozey mess
cherry valley forever

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@putdowntheknifejohn
fuck algebra i donāt need it just give me a dead body and iāll figure it out from there
i feel i should clarify i am a mortuary science major
Whoa. I didn't think nature would allow this.
John about Mr. Crowley
It all started on the thirteenth hour of the thirteenth day of the thirteenth month. We were there to discuss the misprinted calendars the school had purchased.
April Cleaver
John: Hey, Mr. Crowley! How would you like to take a walk nowhere in particular while wearing a blindfold?
Mr. Crowley: Meh, beats just sitting around being old.
Hadn't realised I reblogged those here instead of to my main; have some quotes by way of an apology!
an inspiration to us all
the only alignment chart i'll accept
@devilish-lil-loki
Rack: You remind me of my wife.
John: I'm sorry.
Rack: I said you remind me of my wife.
John: No, I'm sorry that you said that while making heavy eye contact and applying lip balm.
āuhhhh what do i press to pay respectsā
so i started a new book
*drags hands down face*
reblogging this again because this is from Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents and Iām reading it right now and itās incredibly awkward to read about my entire lifeās problems neatly described by a complete stranger
Fuck this is literally meeeeeeee
Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents is right at the top of my psych books list along with Why Does He Do That and Trauma and Recovery.
10/10, highly recommend.
I actually meant to reblog this to my main but it's relevant here.
Uh, shit, fuck, abort! I meant to reblog those to my main.
soā¦..youtubers au?
marci is a popular horror letās-player who skyrocketed in views after her vlog/rant on misogyny in the gaming community went viral
john does niche true crime videos in the vein of buzzfeed unsolved. when it begins to look like thereās a serial killer operating near him, he eagerly tracks the case, unearthing debates about what it means to love true crime, and if itās tasteless or insensitive
marci is a casual viewer and, upon seeing the raging comments section in his fifteen-second response video(ābad can be interesting, and being interested in wrong things isnāt the same as approving of themā *turns off camera*), comes to his defense
he isnāt really sure how to respond to that, and she says he can thank her by listening to a collab pitch at vidcon, which he is reluctantly going to
john: iām not doing it. iām not. what she did was nice and all, but sheās a horror gamer, and i fucking hate horror, the gore is always so fake-ā *sees marci*Ā āand that could totally be fun to mock iām inā
she has him do a two-player on a game based on famous murder cases, every level being a riff on a different one. her subscribers go crazy for it. their banter is legendary within minutes of the first upload.
john hesitantly asks if she would be interested in doing a special on female serial killers. she accepts with a smirk that makes him forget he was telling himself he was only doing it to be fair
by this point, the rpf has already started rolling in, and her guest spot fans the flames. his longtime fans are quick to point out that she makes him look almost as happy as jeffrey dahmerās fbi file being released.
they run off on a tangent during the shoot about whether or not having jack the ripper as the final boss was too cliched, and john has to admit that he genuinely enjoys her company
by this point, the rpf has already started rolling in, and her guest spot fans the flames. his longtime fans are quick to point out that she makes him look almost as happy as jeffrey dahmerās fbi file being released.
john, reading comments: theyāre saying we should do a series. and something about a jarci. is that a character from one of your video games?
he googles it before she can decipher the sentence from the kitchen and learns what colorful conclusions his viewers have drawn about his sexual preferences
she asks a half-catatonic john to show her the camera he has where the most recent body was found, just in case the killer comes back
heās still staring into space when they get there. when he walks right past the tree where itās hidden, marci has to ask wtf is up, and he blurts,Ā āARE WE DATING AND YOU DIDNāT TELL ME?ā
she shrugs, grins and says,Ā āeverybody thinks we should. i mean, they have a point. our chemistry is off the charts.ā
that camera never did capture anything worth showing the police, but it does have footage of two idiots kissing in the snow
john, waking up to a million screaming notifications: i forgot to turn off the fucking stream
but itās just as well; marciās next video is possibly the weirdest iteration of the boyfriend tag ever
Marci: What's this outfit supposed to be?
John: Well I'm sorry if you don't like my breaking and entering clothes, but it's what I could get together in a short amount of time.
There once was a boy named John Wayne Cleaver, and he almost deserved it.
The opening narration if there was any that wasn't by John I mean let's be real
Hey, everybody, I know I havenāt posted in . . . a while, letās just say, BUT! Iām currently amassing quotes and hoping to start posting them soon in celebration of the sixth and final book, which I recently learned comes out in early June. Iām not as far along as Iād like; Iāve got six quotes in my drafts and only like four of them, but I just got a laptop for my birthday, and Iāll be looking for some good ones in the days to come, so hereās hoping.
When do you think you'll get off of hiatus?
First off, Iām sorry this is so late. I donāt really have an excuse, I just kinda . . . yeah. Anyways, this really isnāt the answer that you wanna hear after, like, a month of waiting on me to actually reply, but I really have no idea. It could be a few weeks or a year, and thatās honestly the best Iāve got. Sorry itās so unhelpful/nonspecific.