Hnnnghhh ok idk how to do introductions or talk about myself really well so the following is me trying to do that!! (there’s a slight rant/vent at the start, gender is hard)
Hi! I’m Pzos, or Zi, or Swing or any other nickname. I’m 20 now, I’m still forgetting, and I’m bigender. My two are girl and boy and my pronouns tend to just be he/him, they/them, and she/her.
(Gonna be honest labels are confusing and people tell you that you just ‘know’ and shit when I ask about what being a boy or girl is supposed to mean. Like what the fuck is a girl??? Boy??? Am I both?? Neither??? Idfk I can barely function without the sudden questioning and quest for a self-identity. :/)
I tend to express myself better through art (music, writing, drawing) rather than brown hair, brown eyes, and other traits. So, who am I (At least in this current moment)?
I’m primarily purple and blue with secondary colors of orange and green (the shades, with the exception of blue who is sometimes neon, all feel mint or pastel). I’m bite marks that last for a day, loose clothes that are sometimes worn, toe socks that all have holes and let me grab. I’m a ball of scribbles and pencil smudges, the symbols for Zi and Swing, orange question marks and green swirls. Bright shapes against a black background. I thrive in the rain and storms that shake your house, fill your bones, and blind you.
‘Swing’ is one of the best words to describe me. I swing between decisions and who’s side to take. I swing between the binary genders. My emotions swing quickly or get stuck and simmer. I swing between wanting to talk to others and getting anxious over sending a message. I swing between focusing on one thing, several things, or nothing at all. I swing between wanting to fight and not wanting to hurt anyone. I swing between wanting shoulder length hair and wanting short on side and long on top. I swing between perfect vision and glitching(blurry spots). I swing between understanding how to socialize and panicking because I skipped learning a part. Plus, it’s the best playground equipment.
I use weird words sometimes and if it says anything about how I think I once forgot the word ‘undermine’ and could only describe it as the motion of going under someone and disrespect. I can very easily get overwhelmed and anxious but once I can think the problems are easily solvable.
The last thing I can think of right now is I really fucking want antlers that are the same color as my favorite stuffed animal who I’ve created a whole person for (Randolf). And maybe fangs.
