Angel

20 ASPD + SZPD + OCD Multiple chronic illnesses

[rabidbatwings]

Hi so I forgot about this blog. Hi hello

[rabidbatwings]

Plesse nust gt me help . I'll get to bmi 13 i promise. Just please help me

[rabidbatwings]

I say i'm not that sick but I genuinely fantasized vividly and repetitively about cutting a girl's limbs off and throwing her body in the hotel sewer because she was skinnier than me, so I could be the skinniest one in the group.

[rabidbatwings]

So I have a TERRIBLE sun allergy and I'm in Sicily. I genuinely thought i was gonna faint, my face was burning all over and I'll probably be bedridden for two days.

[erraticanchorforest]

I hate the symptom of "gasping" with POTS because everyone acts so dramatic about it and the reactions I get when I gasp in front of people are so insufferable. Like leave me alone, I'm not doing it on purpose and I'm not just randomly gasping for air to get attention, it doesn't affect you at all, its a part of my medical condition.

[rabidbatwings]

I should order a new Fyodor toy. This one's fucking ugly

[actually-aspd-culture]

ASPD culture is being fake claimed by other pwASPD while having a fucking PROFESSIONAL DIAGNOSIS because apparently SOME people in this community are allergic to different experiences 🫩🫩

They think it's some kind of pissing contest. I'm so fucking tired, dude.- SPKS

[rabidbatwings]

I'm looking at his emotionless plush eyes and feel a deep sense of dread

[rabidbatwings]

My Fyodor toy looks tired of life. Me too buddy

[rabidbatwings]

Guess who got diagnosed with NPD traits. Im one of yall now ig

[alice-aspd1]

Conduct Disorder behaviors I did as a young teen:

- Frequently running away from home to the point where the police were involved. I would do drugs and steal from people.

- Constantly skipping school to the point where I almost got charged with truancy.

- General aggressive behavior. I physically attacked a girl. Threatened another one with a knife. Had to go to court and everything.

- Also threatened my mother and sister with a knife.

- I was constantly hospitalized for my behavior and would physically assault the staff there.

- Cruelty to animals.

- Shoplifting.

- I never bullied anyone but I loved making people afraid of me. I would constantly find ways to freak out my peers and make veiled threats towards them to the point that they were genuinely scared to be near me. It was so fun and I got such a sense of power.

- I was a rare case where child protective services had to get involved, not because my family was abusive or neglectful but because my behavior was so out of control.

I was a fucking nightmare as a teen but in spite of all that I was very charming and fun. Teens and adults couldn't help being drawn to me :)

[rabidbatwings]

I didn't bring my assignment on time. Luckily , my economics teacher was really kind. She even complimented my haircut.

[rabidbatwings]

My second cello teacher is more strict but man is she good, she's also interested in my snakes so I love that for her

[rabidbatwings]

[b2ndage]

i don’t know why people expect to be an exception to me not opening up past a surface level about how my brain works and i hate when they take it personally and make it seem like i’m keeping some secret from them. no i won’t fucking tell you that stuff why should i trust you

[rabidbatwings]

Proverbs 23:2

and put a knife to your throat if you are given to appetite.

[rabidbatwings]

ASPD isn't being emotionless. It's far from that. It's the emptiness beneath your ribs, the loneliness that can never be fixed because of your distrust and hatred for people, the stigma, being tied to beds in straight jackets, wanting to end it but also hoping that eventually you will truly live.